I'm confused.
How can you still be married to your first wife and yet be married to another? Are you a bigamist?
I certainly understand what the Christian vows of marriage mean and that "what God hath joined together, no man can put asunder". Yet you did break those vows and now, since you believe you are still married to your first wife, you are also now committing adultery, aren't you?
This is not a personal attack upon you, but I do hope you will clarify this for me.