[JellyJam]

MISSION ORLANDO - COMMUNIQUE #3 (the last installment):

The Disney security check is all complete, and I give it a thumbs-up. First off, you have to park at least two miles away, then you get on a tram to the main ticketing area. From there, you get on a monorail to the Magic Kingdom. I don't know any jihadis personally (nor do I ever want to), but I imagine that a majority of them have ADHD and would fall into the fetal position if they had to endure all this. We Americans and visiting Europeans are a tough bunch; we can handle these impositions.

Once you're at the main gate, your bags are thoroughly checked, and you have to have two fingers digitally fingerprinted. Disney workers claim it's so that no one tries to get in with your ticket; yeah, right ... Disney is tracking us down, gathering up all our purchasing history and getting ready to flood us with more marketing scams, er, ploys. They know where we live.

Disney's just not my cup o' tea. It's all fantasy - nothing about it is real. Sea World, at least for my family, is more real life. Heck, it has REAL animals, not animontronics. (My wife got a kick out of seeing cobwebs all over Disney's "animals" on the Jungle Cruise. She said, "Since they go to all this trouble trying to make these animals look real, the least they could do is clean up the cobwebs.") We spent 12 hours at Sea World and hated to leave; we spent five hours at Disney and couldn't wait to get the hell out of there.

In conclusion, jihadis likely will spare Orlando. Hearing "It's a Small World" would send them screaming into traffic on I-4, rendering their suicide bombs useless.

[Rushmore Rocks]

I have thoroughly enjoyed reading your "Disney World/Jihadi" reports. What a brave soul you are for doing this intrepid reporting. It really was above the call.

Move over, Geraldo.........JellyJam is on the job!

[Cindy]

THANKS Jellyjam for that update.

Cobwebs on the animals?
Yuk.

[nw_arizona_granny]

We spent 12
hours at Sea World and hated to leave; we spent five hours at Disney
and couldn't wait to get the hell out of there.<<<<

We have missed you, but I do want you to know that with the above, you have proved your fatherhood, it is sealed to you for all eternity.

My reactions would have been the same.

Hugs to you and your family.

With all that experience, we expect to see several funny articles, as I too have enjoyed your reports on the trip.

[appalachian_dweller]

JJ,
Thanks for the reports and laughs. Sounds like you had a terrific time.

>> Tomorrow is the ultimate test: the Magic Kingdom. It's fraught with danger. The Jihadis better not mess with this mommy and daddy, wielding a cranky 4-year-old and a know-it-all 6-year-old. <<

>> In conclusion, jihadis likely will spare Orlando. Hearing "It's a Small World" would send them screaming into traffic on I-4, rendering their suicide bombs useless. <<

PRICESSLESS!!! Rest well my TM FRiend. You have earned it!