Posted on 09/17/2005 6:59:48 AM PDT by teldon30
Dear Amy: I'd like to be in a relationship again, but I never even get asked out (unless you count frisky 85-year-olds and drunks at the corner bar). I'm a 32-year-old woman who's happy, sociable, and attractive. (I paid for college by modeling and continue to take care of myself.) I'm second-in-command at a big company, financially secure, and own a beautiful home. How can I meet men in general, and more specifically, men I'd actually want to date?
Deluxe Chopped Liver
Dear Deluxe: To scare away vampires, it takes garlic and crosses, which make ugly bulges in sleek, satin evening bags. Luckily, all you have to do to scare away men is pull out a business card that says ''senior vice president.''
''Power is the ultimate aphrodisiac,'' said Henry Kissinger. Sure it is unless you're a woman. Research by Stephanie L. Brown and Brian P. Lewis, published in Evolution and Human Behavior (Nov. '04), seems to confirm what many lonely women at the top already know: When guys go for the woman in the boardroom, it isn't the woman running the meeting but the secretary who wheeled in the coffee and croissants before it started.
Sure, plenty of men will scamper up the corporate ladder for a one-night stand. But, according to Brown and Lewis' study, men looking for dates or relationships tend to prefer their subordinates to their colleagues or bosses. The researchers hypothesize that men evolved to want women they can control as a means of guarding against ''parental uncertainty'' unwittingly raising kids fathered by the Neanderthal next door as their own. Brown and Lewis think this may also explain why men are suckers for ''behavioral expressions of vulnerability'' women who act like they might not be able to make it across the street
(Excerpt) Read more at mcall.com ...
Mine are traditional, thank you
You have freepmail,
If you only knew how you just stepped in it...but I'll forgive ya darlin' ;) You don't know me.
There's a big difference between having your Mom live with you, and living with your Mom, FRiend ;^)
Thanks sugar. ;)
"And that's why women should not give sex out like candy. "
Are you suggesting they give it out more like clam chowder? Heaven forbid they give it out like tacos.
My dog is doing great
She has a good "mom" who takes her for long daily walks where
she can run and pursue her biggest passion, hunting furry varmits
(Mom gets her excercise too!)
LOL!
True, but I still love'em
There is no other kind.
The last time my wife pursued me she just barely missed my noggin with a heavy glass ashtray. That was almost 30 years ago when we were getting used to each other. I've always viewed us as a partnership doing equal work at pulling the family wagon. When we married we had nothing except each other, I worked where I could and she stayed home and raised the kids. When they went to school so did she and wound up with a masters. Now I have one of the last good factory jobs in our country and she just started her own company. When we're together it's just us and careers don't count. Oh yeah, she still makes heads turn even though she doesn't think so.
Sounds good. We have been married for 17 years.
I think I understand.
My wife says one thing she likes about me is I never "gave up my power" whatever the hell that means.
I've always called myself a "good guy," then quickly add "good" doesn't mean "nice."
Women should not give out sex until a man demonstrates that he is interested in a commitment- that is, unless the woman wants a shallow, meaningless, short relationship.
Men do not marry women they don't respect- and a woman who sleeps with a man right away with no love present or expectation of commitment is not respected.
DEAR CHOPPED LIVER,
Men crave to be needed, useful, and desired. Look in any organization or church where women are in charge and there will be a lack of men. especially in churches. You do not have to fiegn helplessness, but there needs to be an invitation and a place in your life that a man can be desired by you. If you have the attitude that " I don't need a man I can hire anything out I want" then you will be alone.
Basically its career over relationship which is sad.
When your on your death bed I doubt if most people think about the award they got from work but who they loved and were loved by
that being said
There were ( and are) a lot of men who WANTED their women to Pursue that good paying career because THEY WANTED THE EXTRA CASH.
That was until they found out that the cottage up north, a motorcyle, a big screen TV didn't compensate for companionship, communication, a homecooked meal and snuggling time in front of the fire.
***How does one stave off the ruthless and self-absorbed with ambitions to your powerful position?***
Easy, it's all in management style. I don't make myself look good, I let the people that work for me make me look good (i.e. hire the best people, push them hard and reward them for their hard work). It's not rocket science and I've been using it for years--hasn't failed me yet. I have a firm policy of not running people that work for me under the bus in order to make myself look better.
***And if your comment were nothing but self-congratulation, how would one prove it to you?***
My comment was not "self-congratulation," it's merely my general observation of women like me. Let me give you an example. My sister (who is also an educated professional) was dating a guy who did not go to college and works in a blue-collar position (which is not meant at all to be a put-down, btw). They dated for a few months and seemed to have a lot of fun together. His own family even told her that he thought very highly of her (as our families are well-acquainted), which is not surprising because anyone who knows her can tell you she is a total sweetheart. She's also not at all a woman who puts the pressure on for a man to commit. However, he stops calling her. Months go by and come to find out, he's suddenly engaged to a girl who is a divorcee', with a small child, no solid job, and has no more than a high school education. Now tell me, why would someone choose that over a beautiful, intelligent, sweet, secure woman who doesn't flaunt the fact that she is successful?
I can give you a dozen examples just like this that leave me scratching my head. How would a man prove that my earlier comment wasn't true? Not being scared of women who have their act together and can think for themselves.
Hardly. Being a fish, you would not "feel" wet. And note my original comment contained the qualifier "to some degree."
Metrosexuals are still a rather small subculture.
Unless of course you hit it off with the hired hand! :>)
Seriously I have no problem accepting help
As a side note check out your friendly Vons/Pavillions shopping isles on Sunday afternoon.
I am a married man, and sometimes I had no problem chitchatting with some amazing attractive ladies. No rings on the fingers...
no--i assumed she was a "profile of such women." she has too many of those qualities that are working against her... i would think that in real life, these women really only have two or three of them...
Lets just agree to disagree
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