Woman in power is powerless when it comes to meeting men

http://www.mcall.com/ ^ | September 17, 2005 | Amy Alkon

[teldon30]

Dear Amy: I'd like to be in a relationship again, but I never even get asked out (unless you count frisky 85-year-olds and drunks at the corner bar). I'm a 32-year-old woman who's happy, sociable, and attractive. (I paid for college by modeling and continue to take care of myself.) I'm second-in-command at a big company, financially secure, and own a beautiful home. How can I meet men in general, and more specifically, men I'd actually want to date?

Deluxe Chopped Liver

Dear Deluxe: To scare away vampires, it takes garlic and crosses, which make ugly bulges in sleek, satin evening bags. Luckily, all you have to do to scare away men is pull out a business card that says ''senior vice president.''

''Power is the ultimate aphrodisiac,'' said Henry Kissinger. Sure it is — unless you're a woman. Research by Stephanie L. Brown and Brian P. Lewis, published in Evolution and Human Behavior (Nov. '04), seems to confirm what many lonely women at the top already know: When guys go for the woman in the boardroom, it isn't the woman running the meeting but the secretary who wheeled in the coffee and croissants before it started.

Sure, plenty of men will scamper up the corporate ladder for a one-night stand. But, according to Brown and Lewis' study, men looking for dates or relationships tend to prefer their subordinates to their colleagues or bosses. The researchers hypothesize that men evolved to want women they can control as a means of guarding against ''parental uncertainty'' — unwittingly raising kids fathered by the Neanderthal next door as their own. Brown and Lewis think this may also explain why men are suckers for ''behavioral expressions of vulnerability'' — women who act like they might not be able to make it across the street

[Petruchio]

Sans wedding band, major (or minor) psychosis, bankruptcy, walker/false teeth/pacemaker, Mom-as-current-roommate, no means of transportation and life-threatening illness.

OK, so mebby I'm being picky.

And dumb.
As one who meets a few of the things on your list, I can honestly say you have no clue about what you are missing out on.

"life-threatening illness"? Been there, done that, wear the scars. As one who has been on life support, I do know the value of being Alive. I LIVE my life to the very fullest. I do not exist, I LIVE! Every morning when I wake up I rejoice that I did wake up. You have no clue how fragile life is. You may get hit by a bus tomorrow. It is not the number of days you live, it is how much living you do in those days that counts.

And the "Mom-as-current-roommate" crap. We are commanded in Scripture to Honor our Father and Mother. Our Parents cared for us in our youth when we needed it. It is our duty to return that care when they are old and frail. I made a promise to my late Father that my Mother would not die alone and neglected. If you can't handle a son caring for a parent, then you lose out on being with someone who is capable of caring for you in the same way. True love transcends infirmity. Are you looking for a sex partner, or someone who has enough love for you to wipe your a** when you can't.

If you desire to be loved to that degree, you must be willing to love to the same degree.

[HitmanLV]

I basically agree but reducing it to 'women like bad boys' isn't a secret, nor is it that meaningful. Some of us Freepers have discussed this paradigm often in the past. I personally think that it's not the bad boys they go after at the expense of the nice guys, it's just that they naturally find some bad boy qualities sexy, and find nice guy qualities listeless.

THE secret is that all a man has to do is have some bad boy qualities while remaining a nice guy. I dub that 'The Good Guy' - neither a bad boy nor a nauseatingly nice guy (which is to say, sexless).

And yep, embelishing the image is important in my life! I'm all talk, but the lady in my life appreciates that! ;-)

[apackof2]

Could be because you look 15 years younger, and you're cute ;).

Thank you, that's nice of you to say

[Dont Mention the War]

Am I the only person in this thread who believes the author of this letter doesn't exist, and that the entire thing was made up by the columnist? (I could go into the reasons why, if anyone cares, but if they don't I don't want to type it out, heh heh.)

[MarkL]

Let's not forget that those who control the fashion industry, and thus, decide who get to be models, are largely male homosexuals. In other words, models are picked by people who haven't a clue what really is desirable about women.

Clue: most blokes, myself included, like women who have at least some curves. Not women who look like stick insects on heroin.

This is something I've noticed for some time as well. While the "heroin chic" look never really did it for me, something I've thought since the days of "Twiggy" is that the homosexuals behind the fasion industry are choosing girls and women who often look like effeminate boys.

Mark

[tet68]

I'm hopeing to move up to Watts Bar, I have a friend
who lives up in Spring City and I am looking in the
Spring City/Dayton area.
Hard to find a place that's suitable for a blacksmith shop
and living quarters, but it doesn't take much for me to
be comfortable, still you have to placate the lenders.

Tell your friend Ooorah! for me.
Yes, was there for Tet. Damn Walter Kronkite!

[fqued]

great post

I have been married 29 years. last year I was diagnosed with a class 4 [vey bad] brain tumor, was totally out of commission for months, am still on chemo, etc.

My wife is thankful for every day I am alive - that's true love.

[papertyger]

Men proceeding cow-like???? huh??

Please explain this remark

Are you familiar with the term "bridezilla?"

If men were being attentive to their fiance's implied temperment and values in such cases, these harpies wouldn't ever see the inside of a Church.

[apackof2]

In American society today, *all* women are, to some degree, feminist.

And statement is not just patently wrong but ridiculous!

So if your statement is correct then ALL men nowdays are to some degree confused metrosexuals?

[Nowhere Man]

Ping

[apackof2]

And at that point, I figure it's time cash out my chips

I don't blame you one bit there

[MadIvan]

I think it may start to change - Kate Moss was revealed to be snorting cocaine in a bar not too long ago. This may be finally the trigger that gets rid of this nonsense.

Regards, Ivan

[SauronOfMordor]

If a man said to a woman just a handful of the things I have seen women say to men (whether to me, to friends, or just overhearing in a bar), I'd bet most women would have already joined a convent. Quite the double standard...

Men can be strange critters. A guy who would have no problem staring down a gang of punks on a deserted subway platform may have great difficulty dealing with the risk of being noisily put down by a pack of women at a bar

[apackof2]

End of story.

Agree

[tet68]

YOu are cute, how is your dog doing.

[Fruit of the Spirit]

"Blur, you oughta go after this executive chick. You could tame her! ;o)"

Remember the lesson about woman being taken from the "rib" of man? To stand beside him, not tower over him or be walked on by him, but to be supportive..."a helpmate."

[apackof2]

I think they call that "stalking" nowadays

I don't

[diamond6]

Excellent post; I couldn't have said it better myself.

[HitmanLV]

No, I think there is a good chance the woman in the article isn't real, also. At least, not the way she describes herself.

[Petruchio]

And as one who has been balanced on that brink, you have the perspective to love in return with an intensity others can't even imagine.