Meanwhile, in a galaxy far, far away...
"Your father wanted you to have this when you were smart enough. But Moveon.Org wouldn't allow it. They feared you might actually remember what it is to be an individual."
"What is it?"
"Your father's Free Republic account. This is the weapon of a free man. Not as clumsy or random as a boycott--"
*FREEP*
"...an elegant weapon...for a more civilized time."
"How did my father die?"
"An old woman named Cin Sheehan...who was a citizen once before she turned to evil...helped al Qaeda hunt down and destroy our honorable men. *pause* She betrayed and sullied your father's sacrifice. Now our soldiers are all but demoralized. *deep breath* Sheehan was seduced by the Liberal Side of the Force..."
WOW that was excellent. Impressed BUMP! Even with my tagline I probably would never have come up with that.