Posted on 08/22/2005 5:05:10 AM PDT by genefromjersey
Berlin: When a package started making a ticking sound in a busy post office,all hands were evacuated while the brave officers of the Bomb Squad did their job.
The package turned out to contain something called an “electronic nappy”-designed to monitor baby’s diaper for wetness, and to emit a “beeping” sound – (instead of a sinister ticking noise)- when it is time for a change.
Hmmm… What’s next ? An octopus-armed “Robo-Nanny” ?
(Oh ! They already have one : It’s called a “Mom”.)
Salt Lake City : A local woman was pulling into her two-car garage when she saw something white run in ahead of her.
Accompanied by her Golden Retriever, the woman searched the garage and discovered she had a mountain goat as a guest .
Thinking quickly, the woman opened the other garage door,so the goat could make its getaway.
The goat countered by jumping onto the roof of a pickup truck , in the other bay of the garage , and dancing around on the roof in little circles.
At this point, the woman called Animal Control . She also grabbed her camera : knowing if she told her insurance company the truck had been damaged by a mountain goat , it would be a good idea to have some proof.
Animal Control finally tranquilized the critter, and hauled him away.
“We’re not quite sure why a goat would go and do this “, a Wildlife spokesperson said.
Fortunately,there was no damage to the pickup truck roof – and the woman did get some memorable pictures .
Gardnerville, Nevada : After the lights went out suddenly in the firehouse, two firefighter-paramedics rushed outside to investigate, and found a small grass fire near the base of the 40’ powerline pole.
After extinguishing the blaze, they discovered a just-breathing, badly singed cat ,lying unconscious near the base of the pole.
When the power company checked the pole, they found evidence of the likely cause: a bird’s nest on top of the pole, and a large black spot where something had touched a relay switch on a 25,000 volt line.
The cat , although presently hairless , is expected to make a full recovery; and will hopefully do his future stalking in safer surroundings : not a bad idea, considering the number of lives he has used up !
New York : The prestigious New York Times has invented a new phrase :
Yesterday’s editorial page proclaimed CINDY SHEEHAN as THE OFFICIAL GRIEVING MOTHER (TOGM) , and denounced all who might disagree with her slightest utterance – no matter how wacky or obnoxious.
Such persons are, in the words of the Times, trying to Swift-Boat Cindy.
This proclamation means that OTHER grieving mothers of fallen service personnel exist ONLY as extensions of TOGM , and may be disregarded- (nothing new there !)-especially if they disagree with Cindy Sheehan.
So, heads up, out there ! Don’t Swift-Boat Cindy !!
ps: For all you purists out there,this last entry was partly satirical,okay ?
Probably a victim of domestic abuse.
Why not, it sure worked on Kerry.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.