Posted on 07/03/2005 9:14:29 AM PDT by COUNTrecount
Actor Tom Cruise stunned the worlds of cinema and space travel today, bidding Earth farewell forever as he returned to his planet of origin.
At a launch pad on the outskirts of Malibu constructed specifically for his intergalactic journey, Mr. Cruise spoke briefly to friends, well-wishers, and Larry King, who was covering the launch for CNN.
Farewell, earthlings, Mr. Cruise told the crowd. My work here is done.
The actor then engaged in a twenty-minute kiss with his fiancée, Katie Holmes, whom he said he would send for later.
Boarding the spaceship, Mr. Cruise delighted the crowd with the thumbs-up gesture he immortalized in the film Top Gun, then told them, I feel the need for speed, before disappearing into the stratosphere.
While many had expected Mr. Cruise to return to his own planet at some point, the timing of his departure took many by surprise, coming as it did on the eve of the debut of his summer blockbuster, War of the Worlds.
Executives at Paramount Pictures, who produced the film, expressed concern that Mr. Cruises departure from the solar system would limit his availability to appear on the late-night talk shows.
But according to Buddy Schlantz, a veteran talent agent and observer of the Hollywood scene, Mr. Cruises decision to return to his planet before the films opening may be a masterstroke: If Tom Cruise wanted to do something to make himself more popular, leaving Earth forever was a great place to start.
Elsewhere, in a deeply divided decision, the United States Supreme Court allowed the Texas State Capitol to display The Five Commandments.
What I still cant believe is that pseudo detox clinic he and his scientologist friends set up in ground zero...
LOL!!! "Why would you do that! Why would you do that?" pizzzzzzzzzz..."Why did you do that again? Why did you do that again?" pizzzzzzzzz.."Why did you do that yet again? Why did you do that yet again?" pizzzzzzzz...
Wow, time has not been kind to Vanilla Ice.
ACK-ACK-ACK-ACK-ACK-ACK-ACK-ACK
Translation:We don't want him, we sent him to you in the first place. He's to strange!!!
In the near future... Tom Cruise movies will all be free. A plate will be passed during a short intermission for Scientology donations.
You know something I found very interesting about that was how it changed Toms attitude. When he was telling this guy about the movie, he was talking very arrogant, folding his arms like an authority figure, sort of talking down to the guy. And when this guy squirted him in the face, Tom immediately changed that attitude and laughed. I mention this because my cousin has a baby who sometimes goes into crying fits and will not stop no matter what she does. So what she usually does as a last resort is she sprays water into his face using an emptied Windex bottle filled with water, it makes a mist of water, and I swear, this kid immediately stops crying! It`s like night and day, and this is the same thing I saw here with Cruise. He was in this arrogant attitude and the guy got him out of it the same way, which is why Cruise laughed at first. I think the real reason Tom got ticked off was not exactly because this guy sprayed water in his face, but because he stopped him from being arrogant.
Bye!
Make is a long trip!
ROTFLMAO!
NY POST/PAGE SIX.. SINCE Katie Holmes hooked up with Tom Cruise and the Scientologists, she's not allowed to be alone - ever. When Holmes accompanied Cruise to a recent taping of "The View," eyebrows were raised when she wasn't allowed to go to the bathroom alone. At one point, Cruise asked where the bathroom was and "took Katie with him into the men's room," an insider says. Later, when Holmes needed to go, "three Scientologists followed her in." A rep for "The View" said, "We don't follow guests to the bathroom." Some were also concerned because Holmes "looks like she hasn't slept in weeks."
MOnica babe?....that's what I was thinking but could not find the right words. Must be our great ( dirty) minds.
I read that the girl friday Katie Holmes is not allowed to go to the bathroom alone.... three Scientologists escorted her to the bathroom at a recent taping of The View... surpised Cruise left her on the landing pad...
Looking at that picture, I can't help but think that's probably not the first time Tom has, um, had something like that happen to him. That could easily be a screen capture from one of Tom's home movies.
There is nothing that's "ok" about Cruise. He's a mouthpiece for a very dangerous cult.
I wish you hadn't said that. I had to get a towel and clean the coffee off of my monitor and keyboard.
BAWAhahahahh !!!!!!!!
I believe the air on whatever planet he's from is really thin, and there's no "brain food" there.
tom and his girlfriend/hostage were meant for each other...
I found a web site advertising "Free Katie" tee shirts. Enterprising minds are quick.
don't feel sorry for her, she went from a C-list actress to on every magazine imaginable, and supposedly is also getting 8 million out of the deal.
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