I watched Greta's interview with Joran's mom. My heart broke for her, also. She is indeed sincere and whether her son is guilty or not I believe she loves and trusts her son unconditionally. I would feel the same about my child. She had made a statement earlier that if he did do something, he would have to pay for it. So, she is reasonable and obviously not the type who would overlook the truth when confronted with its absoluteness. But, at this time she doubts that he had any involvement.
I also found her compassion for Beth very sincere and the angel statue she took out of her Christmas decorations and set up with Natalee's prayer card at the base was a genuine act of compassion, concern, and kindness.
The father is strange. But some men are very stand-offish. I believe he knows something, or has some very strong suspicions and is keeping that info close to his vest. He might have a very serious reason for that, none of us knows. Or, he might just be one of those non-emotional men who never show how they really feel and so, seem arrogant and insincere. I don't like that type, but it does not - alone - make him bad. And that is all we really know or have seen about him.
In the beginning I was very, very ready to jump on all of them. I got on the bandwagon about their lifestyle, Joran's behavior, etc. I might have been too hasty. After seeing them as people, there with Greta, and watching the genuine tears flowing from Joran's mom's eyes, I think it is a terrible situation for them also and I am going to be just a bit more merciful for the suffering his mother is enduring. She even made a comment about that as bad as she is feeling about her son, she still has her son and that Beth's situation is so much worse.
I also watched Nat's mom who is an amazing, strong, and dedicated woman. She going at this with all the energy of a bulldozer and that takes so much character. I don't know how she manages holding back the tears, but she does somehow. Different people, different personalities - but definately two women caught in a circle that is breaking both of their hearts.
Joran - either rightly or wrongly - is the key. He is either totally innocent or the best liar in the world. Evidently, even though some people have said some bad things about him, he does seem to have other very redeeming qualities too. Many have attested that he is not the typical troublemaker, sleezeball, bad student, sports jock, or girl chaser that we originally thought he was. Are his bad qualities too different than many boys at that age? I am not so sure. Did he cross the line, go wild and commit some horrible act? I am not sure of that either.
I would love to be sure of something. I would love to knowingly point a finger at someone and be certain that was the criminal, or a bunch who were the criminals in this. At this point I just can't even though I have had strong opinions for weeks.
As this unfolds, it becomes more difficult and is not as easy to stick with some of my original assumptions and suspicions. I know the stories Joran has told have changed. That troubles me. But I do not know what they have changed TO - and for all we know it might make the situation very different.
I think now that we have seen both families, we might have some different opinions about how these kids live and their values than we originally did. I don't think Joran was more priviledged than Natalee, or more spoiled or endulged. She, also comes from a family of obvious comfort and has been given freedoms. They seem pretty equal to me.
I hope we can all take a breather and not finger anyone for the moment and let our hearts - for both families - be softened and pray for all of them. I am asking forgiveness for any hasty assumptions or cruelness I demonstrated in my ferver to find fault or come up with the solution. It is not my place to judge. It is, however, my place to pray and hope for Natalee's safe return and hope that justice will be done. I can't change or solve anything here, at my puter, in my jammies!
The Arubian system is perplexing, and their obvious inability to handle this is very distrubing and enlightening. I think many parents have learned a valuable lesson about letting their children have the adventure of such an excursion. This is not to fault anyone, but I believe this event will give many pause about sending their kids away to another country with only a small group of adults along who are not fully involved with the day-to-day activities of the kids. I am sure all the parents in that small town made a decision that was comfortable to them, and now they must feel great pain about the outcome. There are no winners in this situation. Everyone has been hurt and traumatized. Let us just pray and hope that Natalee is discovered and that she is unharmed in any lasting way. If she is found otherwise, I for one will pray that no other human was responsible and that a tragic accident took place and somehow the series of events that led up to that and followed that do not wrongly incriminate any innocent person.
Only God knows the truth. I certainly do not.
Blessings to all who are hurting in this terrible tragedy. And blessings to whoever is at fault - might God help them come forth and resolve this --- no matter who that might be, they need God's grace now.
Thanks for the well thought out post CitizenM.. :)
Thanks for your comments. I have had some of the same feelings about this case.
After I heard that the Aruba police really had bugged the cell phones of the three, I began to realize that the Aruban police are not as incompetent as I first thought.
It's been reported on this thread that there will be more arrests in this case very soon. I'm surprised about the number of arrests planned. I haven't been able to figure out how so many more could be involved.
Joran's mother said in that interview with Greta, that she called her son's school to warn him not to talk about Natalee. He'd told his pals at school that of course he knew nothing about her disappearance and implied it was voluntary on her part. He also said he'd kick her butt when she turned up because of all the trouble she'd caused him.
I could say the same as you: In the beginning I was very, very ready to jump on all of them. I got on the bandwagon about their lifestyle, Joran's behavior, etc. I might have been too hasty.
In fact, I believe I was the first person to make the Robert Chambers (yuppie murderer) analogy with Joran van der Sloot. I even posted photos of Robert Chambers next to photos of Joran vdS here on FR.
Soon after that, however, I started to think along the lines of what you said so well here: Many have attested that he is not the typical troublemaker, sleezeball, bad student, sports jock, or girl chaser that we originally thought he was. Are his bad qualities too different than many boys at that age? I am not so sure. Did he cross the line, go wild and commit some horrible act? I am not sure of that either.
This especially was brought home to me when I started thinking about one of my own sons, who is very like Joran van der Sloot in many ways: He's tall, smart, a babe-magnet, very "outgoing" (as Joran's mother describes him), clowns around with his friends in photos posted on websites, and likes to stay out late --yet manages to do very very well in a very demanding school.
I also have a pretty, smart, blond, accomplished daughter who won a scholarship to college, and is close to Natalee's age.
So I can easily picture myself in both parents' shoes, and am not attacking one set of parents and defending the other.
But I'm really appalled at the vicious, almost pack-mentality I see here, with posters jumping to conclusions with somehow undeniable "facts," as purveyed by the media we all know we can trust ( /s ) -- and jumping on other posters who dare to disagree.
I wonder if it's occurred to anyone that the investigation might be "STALLED," as someone posted this morning, because the suspects in custody just might, MIGHT, be innocent and know nothing of what ultimately happened to Natalee? And that many of those "facts" accepted as gospel truth here aren't REALLY facts we know to be facts, for sure.
If that scenario is true, then there's very little we can expect to get out of them except perhaps a false confession under pressure. And that wouldn't help anyone, would it.
And you're right that there's very little we here can do to help in this situation, except to pray that Natalee be found safe. And, failing that, that justice be done. To the right person, or persons.