Posted on 06/09/2005 4:46:35 AM PDT by SJackson
'DJ Attacks Live8 Line-Up As 'Too White,'" ran the headline in Britain's Independent On Sunday. No good turn goes unpunished, and the trouble with all the good turns lined up for the Rock Against Bush mega-bash at the G8 summit in Scotland is that they're overwhelmingly of the Caucasian persuasion. That's the crux of the "row" that "broke out" over the weekend between Bob Geldof, Knight Commander of the Order of the British Empire, and Andy Kershaw, Jockey of the Discs at the British Broadcasting Corporation.
"If we are going to change the West's perception of Africa, events like this are the perfect opportunity to do something for Africa's self-esteem," said Kershaw. "But the choice of artists for the Live8 concerts will simply reinforce the global perception of Africa's inferiority." And when elderly 80s rockers like Midge Ure give you an inferiority complex you know you've got a self-esteem problem.
In this epic clash between Sir Bob and DJ Andy, one recalls Henry Kissinger's observation on the Iran/Iraq war: it's a shame they both can't lose.
I've always had a certain regard for Bob Geldof, and it's disappointing to see him lending his name to a feeble bit of poseur politics chiefly aimed at certain Western leaders who are entirely blameless for Africa's current woes and severely constrained in their ability to do anything to alleviate them, at least within the acceptable bounds of transnational political discourse. So I reckon Live8 is a dud, with or without Midge Ure, Pat Boone and Little Jimmy Osmond.
On the other hand, I've always quite liked those BBC radio shows where Andy Kershaw takes a tape recorder to Niger or Mali or some such and comes back with the latest groovy sounds. But come on, man, what a lame-o complaint. Given that you and Bob and the "Make Poverty History" group and all the rest are as one in your indestructible conviction that Africa's such a hopeless case it needs to be put on an ever more lavish drip feed of western "aid" in perpetuity, it's surely a bit late in the day to begin raising self-esteem issues.
I'd have low self-esteem if I'd been taken on by Western do-gooders as a permanent poster child for the world's irredeemable losers.
Bob and Andy agree that paternalism and condescension are the only ways to deal with Africa, they're just quibbling over the particular form of condescension. After all, Kershaw's suggested remedy for avoiding the "reinforcement" of "global perceptions" about Africa would surely reinforce the oldest stereotype of all – that say what you like about these darkies but they've got the most marvelous sense of rhythm.
The point is we all know Africa can produce wild, vibrant, exciting jungle rhythms. What's unclear is whether it can produce anything boring, humdrum and routine. Accountancy firms, for example. I mentioned in a column a few weeks ago the extraordinary number of US tax returns that are now prepared by accountants in India. Small hospitals in America have their patients' CAT scans analyzed overnight by radiologists in India. These and a thousand other niche businesses were not facilitated by government leaders meeting at international summits. That said, government leaders did not actively obstruct their creation and growth, as governments do all over the Dark Continent.
IT'S HARDLY news that Western pop stars are so deeply concerned about Africa that they're willing to climb into wacky gear and caterwaul geriatric rock hits in a stadium for a couple of hours every decade. But would they be prepared to outsource the book-keeping for their music publishing to a guy in Ouagadougou or Niamey? That's tougher than another spasm of feel-good agitprop aimed at that brave band of guilt-ridden Western liberals who got such a frisson out of wasting their money on the tsunami appeal they're itching to waste a ton more. (One quarter of all the tsunami aid sent to Sri Lanka has been sitting on the dock at Colombo since January, unclaimed and/or unprocessed. Maybe Sir Bob could do "Sitting on the Dock of the Bay" for his next charity single.)
As long as Western progressives are divided into those who wish to keep Africa in a backward subsistence agriculture economy and those who wish to keep Africa in a backward subsistence agriculture economy but if the rude field hands break into something catchy enough when Andy Kershaw's passing they'll be in with a shot as the warm-up to Bananarama at the next all-star charity gala, the do-gooders will have no useful contribution to make to Africa's future.
According to the World Bank's "Doing Business" report, in Canada (which, believe me, is no paradise for buccaneering capitalists) it takes two days to incorporate a company; in Mozambique, it takes 153 days. And Mozambique's company law has been unchanged since 1888. In the midst of the unending demands that Bush do this, Blair do that, do more, do it now, would it be unreasonable to suggest that, after 117 years, the government of Mozambique might also be obligated to do something about its regulatory regime?
Meanwhile, next door in Zimbabwe, Robert Mugabe's government is being given hundreds of thousands of tons of emergency supplies from the UN's World Food Programme. At the press conference, James Morris, head of the WFP, was at pains to emphasize that the famine was all due to drought and Aids, and certainly nothing to do with Mr. Mugabe's stewardship of the economy.
Some of us remember that during the 2002 G8 summit, also devoted to Africa, Zimbabwe's government ordered commercial farmers to cease all operations. But still neither the UN nor his fellow African leaders will hear a word against Mr. Mugabe, no matter how many people his kleptocracy starves.
The issue in Africa in every one of its crises, from economic liberty to Aids, is government – a style of government that makes prosperity and civil society all but impossible. Until the do-gooders get serious about that, their efforts will remain a silly distraction.
But, if you want some black music to cheer up the silly distraction, I recommend the lyrics of Andy Razaf, nephew of Queen Ranavalona III of Madagascar. If they ever clean up their kleptocratic act, "Ain't Misbehavin'" would make a great group anthem for Africa's heads of state. Until then, more than a few of their hapless peoples must wonder, "What Did I Do To Be So Black And Blue?"
Thank you for not quidnucing!
Steyn always gets it right :)
One of Steyn's better ones lately, I think.
LOL!
Steyn Bump
Dear God! Is he a verb now, too?
I get letters all the time from Nigerian companies eager to handle my financial transactions.
Just send my account number and they'll get right on it, they say.
Steyn is -- as always -- dead on.
No amount of entertainer posturing will cure what ails Africa.
Corruption, dictatorships run amok, below subsistence wages, apathy, climate, diseases.
It is one thing to raise the capital to "help".
It is quite another to get it actually into the hands of someone "in country" that can use it for good.
Most (if not all) of the money they raise will never get to it's desired or advertised destination.
And just for fun -- I've been to both Ouagadougou and Naimey.
Well that may all be true but I think it was very impolite to say it out loud.
I don't think it impolite to point out Steyn always gets it right ;)
yeah , Mark gets a re-read and a gold star with this one , a few paragraphs were GREAT
.
Yeah, but did you go to the right places when you were there?!!!
What brought you there?
My take on this is as follows ~
EAT THE RICH
TO: NIGERIAN PRESIDENT OLUSEGUN OBASANJO
REQUEST FOR URGENT BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP
FIRST, I MUST SOLICIT YOUR STRICTEST CONFIDENCE IN THIS TRANSACTION. THIS IS BY VIRTUE OF ITS NATURE AS BEING UTTERLY CONFIDENTIAL AND 'TOP SECRET'. I AM SURE AND HAVE CONFIDENCE OF YOUR ABILITY AND RELIABILITY TO PROSECUTE A TRANSACTION OF THIS GREAT MAGNITUDE INVOLVING A PENDING TRANSACTION REQUIRING MAXIIMUM CONFIDENCE.
WE ARE TOP OFFICIAL OF THE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT CONTRACT REVIEW PANEL WHO ARE INTERESTED IN IMPORATION OF GOODS INTO OUR COUNTRY WITH FUNDS WHICH ARE PRESENTLY TRAPPED IN AMERICA. IN ORDER TO COMMENCE THIS BUSINESS WE SOLICIT YOUR ASSISTANCE TO ENABLE US TRANSFER INTO YOUR ACCOUNT THE SAID TRAPPED FUNDS.
THE SOURCE OF THIS FUND IS AS FOLLOWS; DURING THE LAST PRESIDENTIAL REGIME HERE IN AMERICA, THE FIRST LADY AND HER FRIENDS SET UP COMPANIES AND AWARDED THEMSELVES CONTRACTS WHICH WERE GROSSLY OVER-INVOICED IN VARIOUS MINISTRIES. THE PRESENT CIVILIAN GOVERNMENT SET UP A CONTRACT REVIEW PANEL AND WE HAVE IDENTIFIED A LOT OF INFLATED CONTRACT FUNDS WHICH ARE PRESENTLY FLOATING IN THE FEDERAL RESERVE BANK AND ARE READY FOR PAYMENT.
HOWEVER, BY VIRTUE OF OUR POSITION AS CIVIL SERVANTS AND MEMBERS OF THIS PANEL, WE CANNOT ACQUIRE THIS MONEY IN OUR NAMES. I HAVE THEREFORE, BEEN DELEGATED AS A MATTER OF TRUST BY MY COLLEAGUES OF THE PANEL TO LOOK FOR AN OVERSEAS PARTNER INTO WHOSE ACCOUNT WE WOULD TRANSFER THE SUM OF US$21,320,000.00(TWENTY ONE MILLION, THREE HUNDRED AND TWENTY THOUSAND U.S DOLLARS). HENCE WE ARE WRITING YOU THIS LETTER. WE HAVE AGREED TO SHARE THE MONEY THUS; 1. 20% FOR THE ACCOUNT OWNER 2. 70% FOR US (THE OFFICIALS) 3. 10% TO BE USED IN SETTLING TAXATION AND ALL LOCAL AND FOREIGN EXPENSES. IT IS FROM THE 70% THAT WE WISH TO COMMENCE THE IMPORTATION BUSINESS.
PLEASE,NOTE THAT THIS TRANSACTION IS 100% SAFE AND WE HOPE TO COMMENCE THE TRANSFER LATEST SEVEN (7) BANKING DAYS FROM THE DATE OF THE RECEIPT OF THE FOLLOWING INFORMATIOM BY TEL/FAX; 234-1-7740449, YOUR COMPANY'S SIGNED, AND STAMPED LETTERHEAD PAPER THE ABOVE INFORMATION WILL ENABLE US WRITE LETTERS OF CLAIM AND JOB DESCRIPTION RESPECTIVELY. THIS WAY WE WILL USE YOUR COMPANY'S NAME TO APPLY FOR PAYMENT AND RE-AWARD THE CONTRACT IN YOUR COMPANY'S NAME.
WE ARE LOOKING FORWARD TO DOING THIS BUSINESS WITH YOU AND SOLICIT YOUR CONFIDENTIALITY IN THIS TRANSATION. PLEASE ACKNOWLEDGE THE RECEIPT OF THIS LETTER USING THE ABOVE TEL/FAX NUMBERS. I WILL SEND YOU DETAILED INFORMATION OF THIS PENDING PROJECT WHEN I HAVE HEARD FROM YOU.
YOURS FAITHFULLY,
DR CLEMENT OKON
NOTE; PLEASE QUOTE THIS REFERENCE NUMBER (VE/S/09/99) IN ALL YOUR RESPONSES.
You think so? Even though he forgot to mention Mugabe beating, raping, killing, and disposessing all the farmers (white) off the land as the primary cause of the famine?
If Indian accountants are so great why is there so much poverty in India? Is India really any better off than Africa?
I assumed that he assumed his readers were well-informed enough to be aware of that.
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