Redneck IQ Test

Nealz Nuze ^ | ? | unknown

[Quilla]

...with a $10 customer waitin' outside.

;-)

[MJemison]

"It's hot enough to make a mare bite her colt."

"It's hot enough to drive a dog off a gut wagon."

[Phantom Lord]

[KodakKing]

As a Tennessee resident I'll be offended as soon as I stop ROFL! Guess I'm fixin' ta go sit on the front porch couch, get me a chew, and cypher the answers to this here test.

[cloud8]

[SelmaLee]

Hotter'n a brake rotor at Bristol. Double points for having a NASCAR/redneck origin.

[Bloody Sam Roberts]

If your uncle builds a still, which operates at a capacity of 20 gallons of shine produced per hour,

Holy crap! 20 gals per hour?! How big is the boiler? 500 gallons?
And if it is producing 20 gallons per hour, the product is already condensed.

[Phantom Lord]

Has a 20 gallon capacity per hour. Condensers still needed.

And speaking of size, several years ago in Johnston County NC, there was a bust of a guy who had a 10,000 gallon still in his barn!

[chuckles]

Number 2 is A.

B and C would still be runnin.

[Lion in Winter]

I have laughed so hard I am cryin' some. Thanks for the GREAT POST!!

[JoeSixPack1]

YOU HAVE JUST RECEIVED A MEXICAN VIRUS!!!!!

Since Mexicans are not so technologically advanced, this is a MANUAL virus. Please delete all the files on your hard drive yourself.

Thanks.

[sittnick]

4. A woodcutter has a chainsaw, which operates at 2700 RPM. The density of the pine trees in the plot to be harvested is 470 per acre. The plot is 2.3 acres in size. The average tree diameter is 14 inches. How many Budweisers will be drunk before the trees are cut down?

None. Rednecks drink Miller.

[Quix]

What a scream. Thanks.

Tooooo close to home for some of my relatives, though!

[Phantom Lord]

None. Rednecks drink Miller.

The biggest rednecks I know drink Natural Light.

[1L]

I don't think this is a fair test. Consider the following:

1. How big does a bathtub have to be to hold a chevy truck transmission?
2. What is the average number of news crews that show up at any given trailer park after the tornado hit?
3. How many people does the average person hit on at a given family reunion?
4. Who in the average family needs rogain more: men or women?

[stevie_d_64]

"I swear to you, there are no American infidel UFO's within 100 miles of Baghdad..."

Long time no hear-um from you girly!

[sandydipper]

To get the answers call BR549 - 24/7.

[Bloody Sam Roberts]

Has a 20 gallon capacity per hour. Condensers still needed.

Isn't the condensing array the part that actually produces the liquid. So if you get a measurable amount like 20 gallons then the vapor has already been condensed. Filtering and aging (20 minutes or so !) being the final processes. Yes?

What was Mr. 10k's name? Jack Daniels? Hiram Walker? Or his brother Johnny?

[Phantom Lord]

I don't know his name. But for comparrison, it was in the same county that over a ton of MJ was stolen from police custody.

The MJ bust was so big they didn't have room in the evidence room to store it so they got a back hoe, dug a big hole behind the police station, buried it, and when they came back the next morning it was gone!

[Bloody Sam Roberts]

The MJ bust was so big they didn't have room in the evidence room to store it so they got a back hoe, dug a big hole behind the police station, buried it, and when they came back the next morning it was gone!

Brilliant!