Why VERY INTELLIGENT Men Fail With Women

bullz-eye.com ^ | 04/07/05 | by: David DeAngelo, Author of "Double Your Dating"

[HitmanLV]

Some of it is luck, some of it is just flexibility and being realistic. A lot of men and women I know who are alone are holding out for some perfect person that doesn't exist. Sad.

[Joe 6-pack]

"Are you saying you have a big dictionary?"

Not only is my dictionary of biblical proportions, it is also clearly defined and well pronounced.

I rarely share my dictionary with anyone, but those I have shared it with speak volumes about it.

[nopardons]

No woman really wants a "wussy" man; we have girlfriends.

Just as men need to feel that they are the ones doing the wooing ( a form of hunting ),no woman will ever respect a man whom they "hunted".

No matter how competent and brilliant a woman may be, she biologically needs to know that she can run to HER MAN to 1) protect her 2) open that jar of whatever 3) fix whatever is broken/ needs fixing.

One thing where most men fail and fail miserably, in a "sexual" context, is that they don't talk; talk in the right way! Watch old movies ( and I mean OLD ) movies and listen to the way Errol Flynn and Cary Grant and Fred Astaire wooed the leading lady and look at their facial expression and body language. THAT IS PURE, UNALLOYED SEXINESS . WHY? Because all of those men were really involved with the women they wooed...they made them laugh, they made them think, and they adored them with the way they looked and reacted to them. AND NOT A ONE OF THEM TREATED WOMEN AS THOUGH THEY WERE A WHORE OR A NUN AND THEY DIDN'T BULLY THEM EITHER.

I don't like cliches. :-)

[Irish_Thatcherite]

They overlooked the main issue that being most woman when young do not know what they want themselves!

I think your right, especially these days, too many 'options', if too many cooks ruin the dish, then too choices ruin the decision.

Women these days are brought up to believe the world is their oyster - they can have whatever they want, but limited lifespan and limited means ultimatley ends in total confusion.

[Fast1]

LMAO Thanks; I will try to be more "Punctual"!

[mommybain]

Glad I could help out.

[Nowhere Man]

Actually, what you say tends to apply to BOTH men and women.Non-technical minded men, in particular younger ones, do NOT seem to relish discussions on serious matters, rather, they want to discuss sports, partying, sex, and other such things I have experienced this with my own eyes.

For example, One time, in my radio club, A couple of us began to discuss some serious physical science matters, and the talk ventured into string theories, something which I still lack much knowledge on, but am eager to learn more about.

The next day, at my job, another male employee and me were talking, about world affairs, or something like it. Anyhoo, I then mentioned that we had been discussing string theory the night before, to this employee. I was starting to explain the general definition of string theory,(the litle that I understand) and he stopped me, and just started making fun of me, and, for most of the day, maybe even week, talked very simply toward me.

You an amateur radio operator? So am I. I usually like to talk on 2 meters (144-148 Mc) on my HT although I haven't done so lately. One talked to Canada across Lake Erie (I was on the shore) on my HT with a rubber duckie antenna putting out one watt. It was Labor Day 2001 and I couldn't raise anyone in Erie so I heard the Ontario Provincial Police on the 142 Mc band so I decided to go up a few megacycles to listen for amateurs, I figured if I could hear them, they can hear me. Had a long, good chat with them.

I know here in Pittsburgh, we used to have our "Saturday Knights of the Round Table" on one of the local repeaters where we would talk about things like politics, South Park, old computers, you name it. I got to get back into that, it was so dang fun.

There are times I talk about heavy subjects too. String theory is interesting but I also like to discuss politics, one time we had a discussion on classical Marxism vs. what the Soviets and Red Chinese do. We got deep at times. Another deep subject that interests me is "alternate history," i.e., playing "what-if." Like, "what if" the Soviets made it to the Moon first, Hitler died at a certain point in history, what if World War I never happened, etc. History is fascinating. I do get deep. With women, I try not to unless they show an interest, I doubt many of them would want to discuss the geo-political ramifications of Adolph Hitler being assassinated in 1938 or if FDR died in 1940, how would Wendell Wilkie handle World War II? B-)

I guess with me, I'm also into role playing games, an ultimate symbol of geekism. B-) Still, I know some gamers who did find mates who are into gaming even though it is a male dominated hobby. I'm in a Morrow Project play by e-mail game where we do have a female player or two. B-)

Still I know better now, plus from what I have read here gave me some ideas, unfortunatly, until my economic situation gets a little better, women are out right now, but at least I'm learning some valuable things to start off on.

[Rca2000]

Hello again.just got in tonight. had several sets to fix today, such as a ctc-169, no vertical(cap connections), Sony with no conv(bad stk's), NAP- no vert(bad chip), ctc 187, (bad fly), and a mits., picture rolling, (bad SMD caps on PIP module.) All in all, less than three hours of real work, ( mostly done during the Andy mini-marathon on TVland(one big advantage of working on tv sets-- there is ALWAYS one available, to WATCH!!)

Anyway, on the way home, get a call, power is off at home. Sister and mom are hungry, and want food. SO-- pick up some food, then a little fuel for the van,(15 dollars wortth of gas doesn't do much nowdays) and come home. All of this time, (at least an hour, since the power had gone off), the computer is on, sans monitor, running on my UPS(45 dollar ups, hooked to an AVR,which was acquired for free at last years Hamfest in Dayton.)

As soon as I walk in the door, seeing candles around the house, and hand a flashlight to my mom, the power comes back on, the computer was STILL running on the UPS, before. I turned on the monitor... Still booted, except for road runner.(cable had gone off, too.) refreshed explorer. CAME RIGHT BACK UP, no problems!!!My little UPS sure did my proud, tonight.

(something I should remind FReepers about.. It is NOT a good idea, to have all digital, or cordless phones at home. Every household needs at least ONE line-powered, old-fashioned touch-tone phone, that will work WITHOUT the power being on.Otherwise... when the power goes off, NO phones. Now.. I had TWO messages on the answering machine, I had been saving since last Nov, from GWB, and those are most likely lost forever(it is a digital TAD.)AND-- this new "digital" phone service, where the phone is on the cable... DONT!!!! Cable around here is NOTORIOUSLY unreliable, and I would NOT want my phone service to depend on my cable servicer!!

ANYHOO, as for the discussion at hand... NO I am NOT a HAM, the club is for ANTIQUE radios, tv's, etc, but there are a number of hams there.

And yes.. I sometimes get into the "what if" game, too. I love history, especially WWII.

[Rockitz]

Napoleon Dynamite......what a great flick!

[Senator Pardek]

Take my ex-wife - PLEASE take my ex-wife!

[Mr. Jeeves]

Women, for some reason, perpetuate the bad messages being sent to men on how to behave in a sexually appealing way.

I think it's because mothers, understandably, want to be able to control their little boys. When those lessons and strictures carry over into adulthood, however, the problems that result for society as a whole are huge. With so many fathers either absent or spineless these days, there is often no male presence there to say, "Leave the boy alone, Marge - if he's going to grow up he has to learn those lessons for himself."

Perhaps the widespread military service undertaken by 17-18-year-olds in past geneations made a difference, and helped a larger percentage of young men establish themselves as independent individuals, free of Mom's apron strings and her teachings on romance. In these days of the "slacker culture" where it isn't uncommon for 30-year-old men to live with their parents, something is broken.

[HitmanLV]

Very true!

[nopardons]

You don't have to be "loaded" to find a nice young woman to date . If you're flat out broke, then that is a problem, but if you just aren't making a lot...yet and have potential, there are girls who will not only date you, but will probably make you dinner a couple of times a month too.Yes, girls like to be take out to nice places, but some can see farther then the end of their nose. :-)

I took a wee look at your personal page. I'm a VICTORIAN/EDWARDIAN nutter, like alternative history and I can't possibly be the only female with such tastes...you just have to find the ones out there, who share your interests. IT CAN BE DONE ! :-)

[durasell]

Yes, the trick is to exhibit a modicum of "potential." Women love do-it-yourself projects. I've made an entire life of having a great future behind me from the second grade on...

[Melas]

For me, the cardinal offender is the idea that women somehow want a nonmasculine male.

The problem there is that we could argue all night about what makes a man a masculine man, and what non-masculine men lack. The truth is that it varies wildly from person to person, crowd to crowd. The manly attributes that get you by in NYC aren't he same ones that will sell in Ruston Lousiana, and vice versa.

[nopardons]

Well, if you don't finally live up to said " potential", then girls/women WILL dump you. There's nothing worse than an underachiever, unless it's a cad and a bounder.

[HitmanLV]

Not really. The same basic standards apply broadly, though there may be minor regional distinctions.

Like I said in an earlier post, masculine traits include beiong assertive, dominant, confident, goal-oriented, and more. Women respond to this in NYC as well as anywhere else - I know, I lived in nyc for 33 years.

[durasell]

My goal in life has always been to become a "remittance man." And I plan to excel in the field.

[nopardons]

You have been an abject failure at that. No real and true "remittance man" works and you do. I guess that your folks just don't see as a black enough sheep,to pay you to stay away. LOL

[texasbluebell]

Remittance Man
By Jimmy Buffett

Sinner on the mainland
He's a sinner on the sea
He looks for absolution
Not accountability
How many destinations
Oh God he's seen them all
He collects his precious pittance
Never a port of call

Remittance Man
Blacksheep of the family clan
Broke too many rules along the way
Remittance Man
So far away from home
No they'll never understand
The Remittance Man

A man of empty pockets
From jingling his change
The idleness and grieving
For all that he retains
By the harbour lights of Sydney
Or the Bora Bora moon
He recites his sad confession
To the seagulls and the loons

Remittance Man
Blacksheep of the family clan
Broke too many rules along the way
Remittance Man
So far away from home
No they'll never understand
The Remittance Man

Well you can claim that you were born a prince
But you're the only one you can convince
Survivor with no livelihood
That you could ever make it good
But still you dream of what you can pretend

An unexpected passenger
Boarded in Marseilles
An angel full of tenderness
She gave her heart away
She was but a gypsy
He was just a stray
They almost made a miracle but it slowly slipped away
So he follows the equator
With a wish to run aground
It's a very vicious circle
Goin' round and round and round
And he watches from the fantail
As the mainland disappears
Just like the Flying Dutchman
He's a prisoner of his fears

Remittance Man
Blacksheep of the family clan
Broke too many rules along the way
Remittance Man
So far away from home
No they'll never understand
No they'll never understand
No they'll never understand
The Remittance Man