"But to have it all, you give it all up - closeness to children, time together as a family unit and true connection to your spouse."
I've gotten flamed for my opinion on this topic before, but again, I totally disagree with you about this. My mother was (and still is) a successful working woman, who is still married to my dad (almost 40 years now), and I have never been more proud of or inspired by anyone else. I remember helping her proofread her doctoral dissertation when I was in highschool, and thinking that she was the person I wanted to be when I grew up. Neither my brother nor I ever felt neglected or disconnected from our family, and we were both encouraged towards academic and extracurricular accomplishments, both by words and example. I don't think my life would be nearly as enriched as it is if my mother hadn't been so inspiring.
A woman genius academically I think should be an exception to the rule. Her value to society is potentially extremely large. Like a researcher in pharmacueticals as a hypothetical. So its possible such a woman could surpass the value of children, with the value of her impact on society.
Of course here is the counter argument. Woman gifted genetically with intelligence, would also have a higher likely hood of producing genius offspring. So in the long run it still might be worth it for her to have a large family, instead of pursuing her research.
As evidenced by the fact that both of you have academic accomplishments.. thats not surprising if both your parents are intelligent.