Skip to comments.Come back, liberals!
Posted on 03/09/2005 4:44:37 PM PST by perfect stranger
Liberals have been completely intellectually vanquished. Actually, they lost the war of ideas long ago. It's just that now their defeat is so obvious, even they've noticed. As new DNC Chairman Howard Dean might say, it's all over but the screaming.
In an editorial last week, the New York Times gave President Bush credit for democracy sweeping through the Middle East or, as the Times put it, "a year of heartening surprises." Yes, the Middle East's current democratization would come as quite a surprise to anyone who puts his hands over his ears and hums during the president's speeches.
Rolling Stone magazine is making fun of "moveon.org" for having no contact with normal Americans. Their Bush-hating cause has become so hopeless that moveon.org is on the verge of actually moving on.
Marking the first time Walter Cronkite and I have agreed on anything, Cronkite is ridiculing Dan Rather, saying he should have retired a long time ago.
No one, not even Chris Matthews, is defending the Italian communist who claims American forces intentionally shot at her in Iraq. (But to be fair, Keith Oberman has been on vacation this week.) She may have lost some credibility when she backed her claim that Americans were targeting her by quoting her kidnappers. She said her kidnappers had warned her to stay away from the Americans because they would only hurt her. And then my rapist said, "Whatever you do, don't cry out for the police! They won't help you!"
Consider that less than 20 years ago, ABC's Peter Jennings and CBS' Mike Wallace announced at an "Ethics in America" panel that they would not intervene to prevent the slaughter of American troops while on duty as journalists especially during sweeps. As Wallace said: "You don't have a higher duty. No. No. You're a reporter!" It almost makes you wonder if U.S. troops have ever targeted American journalists in the field during wartime. Maybe Eason Jordan would know something about that.
Now liberal journalists are pretending to support the troops. They hardly ever call them "baby killers" anymore, at least to their faces.
Democrats are even pretending to believe in God you know, as they understand Her.
The only people liberals can find to put up a fight these days are ex-Klanners and other assorted nuts.
There's former KKK "Kleagle" and Democratic Sen. Bob Byrd, who compared the Republicans to Hitler last week. Byrd having been a charter member of a fascist organization himself, no one was sure if this was intended as a critique or a compliment.
Aspiring first lady Teresa Heinz claims the election was stolen through the machinations of a vast conspiracy involving Republican polling machine manufacturers. We eagerly await a Michael Moore documentary to flesh out the details. It's only a matter of time before Heinz announces that anti-Bush insurgents control most of the Red States, and that the sooner the U.S. pulls out of those quagmires, the better.
Howard Dean chairman of the party that supports murder, adultery, lying about adultery, coveting other people's money, stealing other people's money, mass-producing human embryos for spare parts like an automotive chop shop and banning God has called the Republican Party "evil." One Democrat in the audience, a preschool teacher no less, complained that Dean was soft-pedaling his message.
Teddy Kennedy's big new idea is to wheel out his 18th proposal to raise the minimum wage. He's been doing this since wages were paid in Spanish doubloons (which coincidentally are now mostly found underwater). Kennedy refuses to countenance any risky schemes like trying to grow the economy so people making minimum wage get raises because they've been promoted. Kennedy's going down and he's taking the party with him! (Recognize the pattern?)
I keep expecting the real Democrats to appear and drag these nuts out of the room, saying, Oh sorry, he's escaped again don't worry, he does this all the time, and then Howard Dean will stand up and have no pants on.
So now, the entire country is ignoring liberals. I'm the canary in the coal mine. Twenty-six congressmen have signed a letter denouncing me for a column I wrote two weeks ago; for the past two weeks, I've been attacked on MSNBC and CNN, in the Detroit Free-Press and on every known liberal blog and radio show. (I especially want to thank Pacifica Radio in this regard.) I personally have shouted their complaints from the rooftops. Liberals had fallen into my trap!
But there was no point in responding because no one had heard about the liberal denunciations in the first place. It was like explaining a joke: OK, and then they said, "Call me a cab," and then I said, "You're a cab! Are you following this? ... Sorry, let me start over again."
This is like beating Dennis Kucinich in an untelevised presidential debate. That and $8.50 will get you a cup of coffee at Starbuck's. I'm tired of helping liberals publicize their attacks on me. Liberals are going to have to do better than that if they want a response from me.
It's not just that we're a divided nation, with liberals watching only CNN and conservatives watching only Fox News. I'm pretty sure liberals are aware of me, and I haven't appeared on CNN for months. It's liberals the country is ignoring. No one knows or cares what they're carrying on about in their media outlets. Liberals can't get arrested. They're even letting Martin Sheen off with a warning now.
I hate to sound selfish at such a great moment for the country, but this is nothing short of calamitous for completely innocent right-wing polemicists. Liberals are too pathetic to write about. I have nothing to do; my life is over. Where have all the flowers gone?
I'm confident they'll stage a comeback someday. In lieu of common sense, liberals have boundless energy. But I'm getting bored waiting. In the interest of good sportsmanship, I have some proposals for liberals. I think Democrats might want to drop the contract all Democrats apparently have to sign pledging to pretend to believe insane things. Also, if you could just get the base of your party to not participate anymore and maybe be a little less crazy, people might listen to you. Barring that, you're just going to have to scream a little louder.
The only way liberals can succeed is to wait for bad times and demagogue every issue to the prejudices of the unwashed. Liberalism is far from dead. Like herpes virus, it has simply gone dormant, silently embedded within the DNA of the body politic, waiting for its host's resistance to go down.
Good Ol' Annie. Gotta love her!!!!
If Ms. Coulter is lurking, and reading this:
I invite you to come along with my unit, as an ember reporter. You HAVE to be better than the NPR flacks currently tagging along...
ember = embed.
See what NPR can do to a man?
That one's going to leave a mark too...
This was a great column, funny and biting!
Ann Coulter dances like a butterfly ans stings like a bee
What is frustrating is that we know the Democrats/world Socialists (M&M by extension) are irrelevant but the Senate, to an extent the House, seem to have missed the memo.
I am not going to state the country has waved goodbye to Democrats- Yet. I will state they have given Republicans a probationary period for the first time in my living memory. Republicans have a chance to make this a lasting majority and secure their valued hides by doing what they campaigned to do. What the President campaigned to do. Do that, and Dems are toast.
Time for the Reps in Washington to WAKE UP! The key word here is "probation". It will not cement as a permanent fixture if you don't earn the right. Judges, ownership society, and you had better find a way to address immigration with reason.
"I invite you to come along with my unit, as an ember reporter . . . ."
Think there is a missspelling here. You really mean you want to get her embed, right?
You, very naughty person, you.... ;]
Actually, a doubloon in its time was a respectable gold coin, an equivalent of maybe $100 today in purchasing power. And I, for one, wouldn't mind getting paid in double eagles, if each was counted at nominal, as $20.
I do fill a bit of pity for Ann. She has no equal on the other side to engage with. I hope the money, in some way, makes up for it. :^)
Oh, Ann, we know it's frustrating to having nothing but nutbags to write about. But don't stop......we love it when you do!
Nonetheless, I'd still like to see if she'd go in theater with the troops who respect her.
Buy that Lady a Steak!! Ann Rox!
The Old Dinosaurs in the Senate have become a museum for the insane. From Sinisters Drunk Uncle Ted, Byrd-brain & Box-a-Rocks, there is no shortage of the musings from the Ash Heap d Histoir. They seem to be in competition with each other of who will be driven away from the Chamber in the Rubber Truck first. Byrd-brains ridiculous rant calling Republicans Nazis because they demand to allow judges to receive votes by the entire chamber is enough to get a one way ticket. What next Crazy Uncle Ted giving lectures on the evils of Driving Drunk??
To call the Republicans Hitler is about as extravagant as it gets from a man who used to recruit to the Klan. Those decades of his life must have slipped his feeble marbles. The fact that he once again proves that the Rats can get away with any attack on any Republican w/o any fear of scrutiny by their lapdog press has become obvious. If any Republican had said anything remotely similar about the Rats, the Stone Age Press would be in full front page assault mode. Let alone if he were a KKKer.
So why is this Old Dinosaur upset enough to compare Republicans to Hitler or those evil Jews who Crucified Jesus in The Passion?? The Pubs want to stop the Dem filibusters against our Conservative Minority Judges. This extreme tactic has disallowed a floor vote which has never ever been done in our history. The Republicans want to have their Judicial nominees to be able to win confirmation with the 51 vote majority rather than the 60 vote supermajority it takes to stop a filibuster. Obviously, since we have 55 Republican Senators we can confirm any of these judges without the minority votes. The filibuster rule is being abused to give the minority power it was never earned at the ballot box. Their coup alienates 55 states full of voters.
The Republicans need to become Phili-Busters! They have to step up to the plate and defend their power in the Senate. The Senates role is not to decide who passes the DinocRat litmus test on abortion or homosexual marriage, but to vote on whether the nominee is qualified, period. We need to take a stand on this point and not allow our Senators to be bullied by the press and their minions in Congress. This is a major axis point in the transfer of power to Republican.
The official changing of the rules in the Senate to return to allowing filibuster for the 6 criteria allowed in the Constitution and eliminate this extremist tactic. The Rats use of this loophole which has never been allowed previously IS the Nuclear option. They are the ones who have used this extreme measure to disallow Conservative Blacks, Hispanics, Women and Catholics from assuming judgeships they are fully qualified. These filibusters are strictly political to make sure that the minorities in America dont realize their Brothers and Sisters are advancing through the Republican Party into places that they cant go on the Rat Plantation.
There is enough irony of an ex-Klansman lecturing the Party of Lincoln about stopping him from keeping minorities from advancement, to build a battleship. For an ex-clansman to call them Nazis was either the ultimate putdown or his ultimate compliment??? Imagine those Christ Murdering, Hitleresque Republicans demanding a vote in the Senate. They should just resign for theyre outrageous demand. Forcing the Rats to confirm judges the way it has been for the past 228 years.
The phrase, those who live in Glass Houses shouldnt throw rocks; doesnt apply to the Dems. The double standard allows these feeble old fools to live in their Crystal Palaces and fire howitzers through them without anyone noticing the broken glass. The scribes from Pravda provides cover for these outrageous statements with no retribution. The digital press is now reporting it with a larger and larger audience viewing these byrdbrains for what they really are. The tide is turning and from CommieWood to Camelot. The weblength of truth is being shined on their vile attacks. The hungry old Dinosaurs wade into the night with the warm ooze of tar squeezing between their toes.
Pray for W and Our Freedom Marching Troops
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