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Nice jeans. But should you really wear them to the opera?
The Christian Science Monitor ^ | 3/9/05 | Kim Campell

Posted on 03/09/2005 9:47:25 AM PST by qam1

NEW YORK – They've been part of the American "uniform" for years, worn to casual restaurants, house parties, and some workplaces.

But as jeans become more expensive, they are also becoming more ubiquitous, showing up everywhere from Midwestern churches to Broadway shows. Nothing is off limits, it seems. Or is it? Among those who buy high-priced, designer denim or who simply don jeans frequently - there's debate about where it's appropriate to wear them.

The tug of war over jeans etiquette is particularly prevalent in New York City. Here, people tend to be more creative about their appearance, and are often more demanding about how fashion-conscious people should look, says Dannielle Romano, editor at large for DailyCandy.com, a fashion and trends website.

Many 20- and 30-somethings here have theater backgrounds, for example, and often say it's inappropriate to wear jeans to theater and other cultural performances out of respect for the performers and the surroundings (even though the venues themselves have no official dress codes).

"I am all in favor of the current denim revolution that we are having, but I do feel that there are times when jeans should be left at home," says Lisa Kerson, a jewelry designer in her early 30s, whose parents insisted that she look nice when going to a play or traveling on a plane. "I still get bothered when I see people wearing jeans to the theater, ballet, opera, etc.," she says in an e-mail.

Melissa Popiel also prefers not to see denim at the theater, or at an engagement party. To her, jeans are OK for a house party or a casual dinner, but not for traditionally dressy places. "I don't like going to cocktail parties and seeing people in jeans," says the advertising executive, who's in her late 20s.

Ms. Popiel estimates she owns about 15 to 20 pairs, including premium brands, and has paid as much as $200 for a pair.

Many others are also paying big bucks for their jeans - from $150 to $1,000 or more per pair. Celebrities, in particular, are making jeans their garb of choice for appearances on talk shows and at some red-carpet events.

That, say fashion experts, sets the tone for the masses, who are encouraged by features like one in the Jan. 24 edition of Us magazine, "Hollywood's 10 Hottest Jeans," complete with suggestions for buying "premium" denim ($140 or more).

The concept of designer jeans is not new, however. They were also hot in the 1970s and 80s.

Are these jeans made for parties?

Etiquette experts offer few hard and fast rules about jeans, but among them are the obvious: Leave them in the closet when you're attending a wedding, or if your workplace bans them.

"A lot of it has to do with the appropriateness of the kind of jean you're wearing," says Peter Post, grandson of manners maven Emily Post and author of the book "Essential Manners for Men."

It comes down to determining if the jeans are for fashion or work. A pair that you do yard work in, for example, are "probably not appropriate to be wearing to a restaurant that night," he explains.

Mr. Post has seen men show up in quality restaurants wearing denim, which doesn't bother him as much as how sloppy their appearance sometimes is.He recalls seeing a man dressed in a T-shirt and old rumpled jeans. "He hadn't taken any care to step it up just a notch, to say to the woman he was with, 'You know, you're really important to me. I want to look good. I want you to look at me and be proud of me,' " he says.

Dark denim is making it easier for men to comfortably wear jeans in the evenings, especially since black jeans are no longer "in." But no matter how hip a certain style may be, some places are still off-limits.

"I probably won't wear them to a funeral," says Robert Smith, a 30- something businessman in Rockton, Ill. But in the past few years he's started wearing them everywhere else - to church and to most work-related functions.

Not the fabric but how it's used

The good news for jeans devotees is that standards for judging people on their appearance are loosening a bit - at least among women under 40. A recent study by Cotton Incorporated indicates that Generation X-age women (26 to 39) are less concerned about first impressions when it comes to dressing than they were 10 years ago, and more often are taking the approach that "you can't judge a book by its cover." The reverse was true for women boomer-age and older.

Alice Harris, author of the book "The Blue Jean," attributes the rise of jeans to casual Fridays in workplaces, which shifted the way people viewed dressing.

"We've actually gone back to a much simpler way of looking at it," suggests Post of the changing attitudes. It's not that certain materials, like denim, are bad. "It's what you've done with that material."


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Extended News
KEYWORDS: actyourage; bluejeans; casualfridays; dresscode; fashion; genx; manners; proper; slobs; slobsarerude
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To: tacticalogic

"...The more they tend toward the social, the more they're concerned with appearances."

I agree. And the more they are concerned with appearances, the more distanced they become from the true purpose of a church.


361 posted on 03/09/2005 4:53:48 PM PST by Chena
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To: durasell

I know. My daughter used to buy suits and they were beautiful and cost too I thought.


362 posted on 03/09/2005 4:54:12 PM PST by cubreporter (I trust and admire Rush. He has done more for this country than he will ever know. God bless him.)
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To: Chena

For some of the women who spend, say $1,500 on a pair of shoes -- $1,500 isn't that much. They're rich. Some women who spend the same amount save up to buy the same shoes because the shoes convey something they aspire to...for a complete explanation of this go to Thorstein Veblen, Theory of the Leisure Class.


363 posted on 03/09/2005 4:55:53 PM PST by durasell (Friends are so alarming, My lover's never charming...)
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To: Chena; Modernman; Eepsy; todd1; Tamar1973; xsmommy; antoninartaud

It seems people are more concerned about what they are doing AFTER church when choosing their clothes as opposed to church attendance itself. Why is it that people think it is okay to dress up for work, the country club or golf course, etc. but when meeting God can only scrounge up a pair of jeans? It's lazy. Out of 168 hours in a week you can't give one hour of not being comfortable for the Lord?

For the Catholics out there, have you forgotten why you go to Mass? Cathechism states (1382):
The Mass is at the same time, and inseparably , the sacrificial memorial in which the sacrifice of the cross is perpetuated and the sacred banquet of communion with the Lord's body and blood. But the celebration of the Eucharistic sacrifice is wholly directed towaerd the intimate union oc the faithful with Christ through communion. To receive communion is to receive Christ himself who offered himself for us.

You really want to do this in jeans? The Catechism recognizes the need for outward signs of our inward understanding of just what is happening at Mass.

(CCC #1387):Bodily demeanor (gestures, clothing) ought to convey the respect, solemnity, and joy of this moment when Christ becomes our guest.

How do you expect children to learn how magnificent this is? They don't understand that the little wafer is Jesus. However, my kids know that Mass is an important, special event because they dress up for it. They, and I, do not wear our "dressy casual" jeans to church...EVER. My husband and I are the primary educators of our kids' in matters of the faith. We set an appropriate example for them.

We dress up out of respect and honor. We don't do it because the Church has written some sort of dress code that we have to follow. We don't do it so we can look down our noses at people not wearing clothes like us. It's just common sense. And to think that we, who take the time to make ourselves presentable for certain occasions yet feel irritation at those who don't are rude or ignorant, or un-christian like, is also rude and ignorant. Show a little respect.

Btw, I wear jeans almost on a daily basis. I love them. I'm not comfortable in anything else but jeans. Okay, that and a white shirt. You can never have too many white shirts! Didn't want any of you to think I was running around topless. Sorry! :-) I do realize that even though I may not want to be judged by what I have on, there is such a thing called "first impressions". It's life. Usually, people see you before they have the chance to talk to you.

And for those that can not afford anything other than jeans, how un-Christian are we that we can't help that person. A pair of khakis at the Salvation Army would cost about $5. Maybe one of these non-judgemental people might care to buy the man a pair of slacks. We're not talking a $500 suit. Modesty and moderation are also important.

Show God the respect he deserves. Not because he cares whether or not you are wearing jeans but because He deserves our best.


364 posted on 03/09/2005 4:56:03 PM PST by samiam1972 (Live simply so that others may simply live!)
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To: nopardons

...when it's a stop-over for Jupiter Island?

(do I win anything if I'm right?)


365 posted on 03/09/2005 4:56:56 PM PST by durasell (Friends are so alarming, My lover's never charming...)
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To: 13foxtrot
I never dress on account of what folks expect me to wear.

When I want to send a message...

You admit you intentionally dress to send a message, then deny it.

hmmmmmmmmmmmm, interesting...very interesting.

366 posted on 03/09/2005 4:57:27 PM PST by cyncooper
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To: durasell
That's NOT what the poster I was replying to said...he/she said "progressive".

And like the idiotic hippies,who claimed that they dressed differently than the norm,to get away from "CONFORMITY",there was NEVER anyone as conformist as the hippies and there is now nothing "different",now,about piercings and tattoos.

367 posted on 03/09/2005 4:57:39 PM PST by nopardons
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To: nopardons

I don't know how the term "progressive" is being used. Is it being used as "better" or as "just the next thing."


368 posted on 03/09/2005 4:59:32 PM PST by durasell (Friends are so alarming, My lover's never charming...)
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To: Tamar1973
One of my former college roommates borrowed a pair of my jeans but she wouldn't wear them until she had ironed and starched them. They were as stiff as a board when she was done w/ them. I had to wash them twice to get the stuff out after she returned them. (She had never even worn jeans before because her parents always made her wear dresses.)

I don't know when you went to college, but when I attended I and my roommates starched and ironed our jeans, too, and we certainly were not backwards and repressed by dress-forcing parents. (I rarely touch the iron these days...)

369 posted on 03/09/2005 5:00:16 PM PST by cyncooper
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To: EllaMinnow

I love jeans. I live in jeans. Long jeans in the winter, denim shorts during warm weather. Long jean skirts, short jean skirts, denim jumpers.

I know how to dress for the occasion, though, and speak only of my day to day attire, not events.


370 posted on 03/09/2005 5:02:33 PM PST by cyncooper
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To: tacticalogic
The more they tend toward the social, the more they're concerned with appearances.

I would say it's the opposite. The more casual, the more social.

371 posted on 03/09/2005 5:03:00 PM PST by Tamar1973 (The path to conservative brilliance starts at Free Republic!)
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To: durasell
We have a most definite parting of the ways. I HATE AND ABHOR THAT PETER SELLERS! He staged "THE MIKADO" in modern day Japan in a Masda (or some such) factory. Some things can be transplanted to other eras/places (Orson Wells' Macbeth into sort of a Nazi thingy),but hands off my G&S!!!!!!!!!!
372 posted on 03/09/2005 5:03:07 PM PST by nopardons
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To: nopardons

My chinese food has arrived. I have to go.

Goodbye all.


373 posted on 03/09/2005 5:03:10 PM PST by durasell (Friends are so alarming, My lover's never charming...)
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To: Xenalyte
When you are worshiping, or allegedly doing so, NO FREAKIN' WAY.

Ladies, what say y'all?

We in this family wear dresses or skirts to church.

374 posted on 03/09/2005 5:04:36 PM PST by cyncooper
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To: nopardons

I'm back to reply to the Peter Sellers thing -- I like "trick staging" of classics. It freshens them up. I even liked the new Romeo & Juliet done in MTV style and the new Richard III. It's a weakness maybe and a vice, I can't help it.

I want to see Othello done in LA rap music culture.

Okay. All I have to say.

I get the last word....ha!


375 posted on 03/09/2005 5:05:32 PM PST by durasell (Friends are so alarming, My lover's never charming...)
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To: cyncooper
One of my former college roommates borrowed a pair of my jeans but she wouldn't wear them until she had ironed and starched them. They were as stiff as a board when she was done w/ them. I had to wash them twice to get the stuff out after she returned them. (She had never even worn jeans before because her parents always made her wear dresses.)

I don't know when you went to college, but when I attended I and my roommates starched and ironed our jeans, too, and we certainly were not backwards and repressed by dress-forcing parents. (I rarely touch the iron these days...)

Let me put it this way, I'm Gen-X. Gen-X is NOT known for starched blue jeans. HAHAHA!

376 posted on 03/09/2005 5:08:39 PM PST by Tamar1973 (The path to conservative brilliance starts at Free Republic!)
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To: durasell
WRONG COAST and it's NOT a stop-over for any place!

You might have won something,if you were correct,but since your geography is so wrong, you "win" bupkiss.

377 posted on 03/09/2005 5:09:08 PM PST by nopardons
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To: Tamar1973
I would say it's the opposite. The more casual, the more social.

Maybe it's a matter of perspective then. I've been to some large churches in the city where everyone was expected to dress nice. For the last few years I've been going to a small one room country church with a regular congregation of about 25-30. The dress is more varied, and there are a couple of sun-baked old farmers who regularly show up in jeans and chambry shirts. On the whole I find it a much more spiritual experience.

378 posted on 03/09/2005 5:09:43 PM PST by tacticalogic ("Oh, bother!" said Pooh, as he chambered his last round.)
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To: durasell
Damned if I know,which is WHY I asked for an explanation and clarification.
379 posted on 03/09/2005 5:10:30 PM PST by nopardons
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To: durasell

Enjoy your din-din. :-)


380 posted on 03/09/2005 5:11:49 PM PST by nopardons
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