My advice: demand she gets a full time or 30 hr week job and then split the house chores.....well, at least it's a start.
FYI: I worked 75-85 hrs (7 days per week) for 8 1/2; weeks straight with 1/2 day off. I got nagged at for 'always being tired' when I got home. The company didn't get the contract, but, we did some awesome R and D work and I got a hell of a raise in Jan. even though she had walked out in Oct. after 19 years.
You don't get something for nothing.....just keep the faith!
still that's got to have been hard on you and a marriage, when you aren't able to at least come up for a breath every now and again. Not saying I sympathise with her!!!...very stupid and selfish of her to let 19 years go down the drain for a slight change in schedule or for an aberration that in the longterm would have benefitted you both. Sometimes I *wish* my hubby had longer hours...then I wouldn't see him stressing about paying the bills, especially since I am a stay at home mom and am homeschooling now.