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To: Idisarthur
In a marriage, there should be mutual trust. Both partners feel they should be able to take each other at their word. Infidelity is so devastating because it represents not so much a violation of sexual exclusivity, which is bad enough, as it is a betrayal of a solemn undertaking to a partner's intellectual and emotional loyalty that's important to a relationship apart from sex. You can easily imagine if your partner is sleeping with someone else, that they can betray to the person they're with everything you've confided in them. And its for that reason a marriage seldom recovers. You could forgive someone for sleeping around - we're all human and have physical weaknesses and none of us is perfect but you couldn't forgive them for going to someone else for intellectual and emotional stimulation. That's like saying you're not my lover; heck, you're not my soulmate any more. So if you're married, remember cheating's more than just about the coupling of two guilty strangers in a secret tryst.

Denny Crane: "There are two places to find the truth. First God and then Fox News."

310 posted on 02/07/2005 8:18:06 PM PST by goldstategop (In Memory Of A Dearly Beloved Friend Who Lives On In My Heart Forever)
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To: goldstategop
thoughtful. I agree

I think if and when 1 of 2 gets weak or lazy in the relationship.... doesn't communicate or show effort.... (this could mean not pulling their weight.... not do something with family.... not wash dishes together... not sharing in adult conversation.....) THEN COMES the AFFAIRS.

So be selfless
315 posted on 02/07/2005 8:28:02 PM PST by Idisarthur
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