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Your Favorite Johnny Carson Joke?
Free Republic Vanity Kind-of ^
| 01/23/2005
| gortklattu
Posted on 01/23/2005 11:57:30 AM PST by gortklattu
Just the Jokes, OK?
![](http://www.johnnycarson.com/carson/images/carnac/carnac4.jpg)
Johnny: "Sis - Boom - Bah
ED: "Sim - boom - bah
Johnny: What sound does an exploding sheep make?
TOPICS: News/Current Events; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: johnny; johnnycarson
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To: BigSkyFreeper; Quix
Why didn't you just start a different thread in the chat area? My God. I couldn't care less for your off-topic tangent apology. You ranted about it in every Johnny Carson thread all day. (I did???!!!!!)You must feel real smug from one Conservative to another! If you had any 'class' you wouldn't even feel compelled to trash me like this. How does it feel to be a RINO?
Are you two related?
201
posted on
01/24/2005 4:40:04 AM PST
by
SheLion
(God bless our military members and keep them safe.)
To: Cagey
Roflmao, that bit between Carson and Webb is classic!
202
posted on
01/24/2005 4:40:44 AM PST
by
SeaBiscuit
(God Bless all who defend America and the rest can go to hell.)
To: gortklattu
I have heard from several sources that Carol Wayne had a genius-level IQ.
Guess you have to be pretty smart to be good at acting dumb.
203
posted on
01/24/2005 4:40:57 AM PST
by
capt. norm
(Rap is to music what the Etch-A-Sketch is to art.)
To: SheLion
Apparently you don't believe in rights and freedoms of others. You seem rather self-centered. Not the trademark of a Conservative. As for your RINO comment, you resemble a CINO with your POV.
204
posted on
01/24/2005 4:45:21 AM PST
by
BigSkyFreeper
(PEST/Suicide Hotline 1-800-BUSH-WON)
To: hunter112
My all-time favorite Carnac insult:
"May your only daughter wear a bra with three cups!"
205
posted on
01/24/2005 4:52:43 AM PST
by
capt. norm
(Rap is to music what the Etch-A-Sketch is to art.)
To: SeaBiscuit
There's a link to the audio of that routine in post #118 but of course without seeing their faces it's just not the same. Carson's facial expressions are unmatched in that routine and so many others.
206
posted on
01/24/2005 4:58:34 AM PST
by
Cagey
To: gortklattu
A. "Knickerbocker"
Q. "What do you want to avoid doing when you shave her bocker?"
207
posted on
01/24/2005 5:00:30 AM PST
by
Richard Kimball
(We sleep soundly in our beds because rough men are ready to do violence on our behalf)
To: gortklattu; Petronski
I'm lost......... I took the Slawson Cutoff.
*******
Heaven is a funnier place today with Johnny there.
208
posted on
01/24/2005 5:18:02 AM PST
by
beyond the sea
(Andrea Mitchell is Barbra Streisand on peyote ......and the north end of a south bound mule.)
To: Cagey
Thanks for the link! Yep I agree, Carson's facial expressions were priceless. Good material like the Webb skit or bad material it was often his expressions that would crack people up.
209
posted on
01/24/2005 5:18:39 AM PST
by
SeaBiscuit
(God Bless all who defend America and the rest can go to hell.)
To: gortklattu
It was so cold today.
How cold was it?
It was so cold, a flasher came up to me and described himself.
210
posted on
01/24/2005 5:24:01 AM PST
by
ru4liberty
(I don't know what tomorrow holds, but I know Who holds tomorrow. May His Name ever be praised!)
To: Uncle Hal
That's the cat/pussy incident. I have it on tape. It was Jane Fonda who had her "cat" on her lap.
211
posted on
01/24/2005 5:31:12 AM PST
by
beyond the sea
(Andrea Mitchell is Barbra Streisand on peyote ......and the north end of a south bound mule.)
To: beyond the sea
"heaven is a funnier place with Johnny there."
how beautiful
To: NorCalRepub
I think the pussy thing is an urban legend. But he did tell Ann Margaret, who was talking about her gardening, that he'd like to see her shrubs, or something like that.
213
posted on
01/24/2005 5:36:14 AM PST
by
zook
To: zook
But he did tell Ann Margaret, who was talking about her gardening, that he'd like to see her shrubs, or something like that.Yeh, and I saw a piece on yesterday with him and Dolly Parton. She was saying to the audience that they (her breasts) were all real. Johnny looked over shyly and said, I'd give a month's pay to peak in there to see for myself". LOL!
Ed McMahon was on Larry King and said correctly........ that Johnny could every once in a while get away with somewhat slightly off color schtick in those times just because he was such a standup, clean guy, nice. Ed was right. Johnny was an American treasure.
***
May your only son be goalie on nudist hockey team!
;-)
214
posted on
01/24/2005 5:50:46 AM PST
by
beyond the sea
(Andrea Mitchell is Barbra Streisand on peyote ......and the north end of a south bound mule.)
To: Trout-Mouth
But not if you got hit by an SUV.
215
posted on
01/24/2005 6:03:44 AM PST
by
gitmo
(Thanks, Mel. I needed that.)
To: BigSkyFreeper
Apparently you don't believe in rights and freedoms of others. You seem rather self-centered. Not the trademark of a Conservative. As for your RINO comment, you resemble a CINO with your POV.Awww baby... you must be lashing out at me because the fat police are knocking on your door and you are panic stricken. Didn't anyone ever tell you that it's all freedoms or none?
216
posted on
01/24/2005 6:44:44 AM PST
by
SheLion
(God bless our military members and keep them safe.)
To: BigSkyFreeper
I just checked your home page. I won't be arguing with you anymore. Your too cute to argue with.
Have a good day there and stay warm. I live in northern Maine where it's BITTER cold. Sunny but bitter!
217
posted on
01/24/2005 6:47:41 AM PST
by
SheLion
(God bless our military members and keep them safe.)
One of my favorite Carson moments was when Ed Ames was demonstrating how to throw a tomahawk, only to hit a cardboard dummy in the crotch.
Carson replied: I didnt even know you were Jewish.
218
posted on
01/24/2005 7:23:08 AM PST
by
Cornjonny
(Remember folks, only you can prevent Hillary!!)
To: gortklattu
A show where children, parents and granparents could all watch at the same time together........will never happen again!
![](http://www.papineaufamily.com/paul/Holidays/Egypt/images/karnak2.jpg)
Remember when he was showing a little boy magic tricks on how to make a quarter dissappear and the amazed boy asked"could you make a million dissappear?" to which Johnny quickly uttered "Yea, get married!"
219
posted on
01/24/2005 7:26:29 AM PST
by
MadelineZapeezda
(If you right click on Keith Olberman's image, the word a$$hole should come up!)
To: zook
He had the same exchange with Raquel Welch.
Raquel Welch: It's very reassuring in a way to know that all these fans are so interested in film personalities that they would like to come, you know, and even just look at your house and your shrubs, it sometimes it's rather embarrassing.
Johnny: I'd love to see your shrubs.
220
posted on
01/24/2005 7:30:17 AM PST
by
Cornjonny
(Remember folks, only you can prevent Hillary!!)
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