Okla. Gays Struggle to Remain Optimistic

TULSA, Okla. (AP) -- Far from the coastal strongholds of the same-sex marriage movement, gays in the red states of the Bible Belt are struggling to maintain confidence and optimism in the aftermath of an election that many viewed as a stinging personal rebuff.

In Oklahoma, the 76 percent support for a constitutional ban on gay marriage has prompted some gays to leave the state or consider leaving. The staff of Tulsa's community center for gays and lesbians say calls to the center's help line, some of them suicidal, have tripled since the election.

"Some people talk about leaving, but there's a larger group more invested in fighting than they were before," said Mark Bonney, a gay activist who heads Tulsa Oklahomans for Human Rights. "They're saying it's time to come out to their families, to draw a line in the sand."

The resilience is evident in the launch of a $1 million fund-raising campaign for a new gay community center, in a court challenge of a new state law opposing adoptions by same-sex couples, and in the decision of two lesbian couples to file a lawsuit against the state and federal laws that deny recognition to same-sex unions.

"Tulsa is our home, and we have a strong community of family and friends," said Sue Barton, one of the plaintiffs. "Why would we pack up and leave just because we're treated unequally? We'd rather work toward being treated equally here."

Oklahoma was among 11 states that passed gay-marriage bans on Nov. 2. Only Mississippi's amendment won a higher portion of votes - 86 percent.

"We couldn't get married before, so it didn't create any larger legal hurdle," Bonney said. "But it's got to hurt, when you know that three out of four of your neighbors don't want you around. It was a statement of hate."

The author of Oklahoma's gay-marriage ban, Republican state Sen. James Williamson of Tulsa, insists hate was not a factor, but he shares the view of many in this churchgoing state that homosexuality is a sinful lifestyle choice.

"As a Christian, I don't like that behavior," Williamson said. "If they want to live their life quietly, in the privacy of their homes, that's freedom in America. But when you want to force the rest of us to accept a new definition of marriage, we're not going to stand for that."

Except for one small town, no Oklahoma municipality has joined the hundreds of cities and towns nationwide that have expanded anti-discrimination laws to cover sexual orientation.

"We'll never go there," Williamson said. "If a Christian couple here in Oklahoma doesn't want to rent property to openly in-your-face homosexuals, they should have a right to do that."

Oklahomans voted overwhelmingly Republican - red on the campaign map - in the presidential race, and also gave the GOP control of the state House for the first time in more than 80 years, increasing the likelihood of socially conservative legislation.

Tom Neal, an aspiring architect and publisher of a now-defunct monthly gay newspaper, said fears of growing intolerance have prompted him and several friends to consider moving to Canada.

Two of his friends, partners for 24 years, plan to wed next month in British Columbia, and Neal said he would join them in surveying real estate there. He's descended from Oklahoma Land Rush settlers, but Neal says that "after this election, I'm literally feeling a lot less safe."

Atlanta native Laura Belmonte says she has established a comfortable life as a history professor at Oklahoma State University in Stillwater, where she lives with her lesbian partner and sometimes advises gay students.

"Some Oklahomans make this blatant assumption about sameness - that you're straight, you're an evangelical, you're conservative," she said. "If you challenge any component of that, some people just write you off."

To an extent, national gay-rights groups also wrote off Oklahoma's gay community - offering only token assistance for the longshot campaign against the marriage ban.

Bonney said he understood the pragmatism behind such decisions, although he noted that Tulsa gays have been organized and active for 20 years. Far from demanding marriage rights, many gays and lesbians in Oklahoma are still wrestling with whether to come out to family and associates, he said.

"You can't have marriage until you've gained enough self-acceptance to demand respect from your neighbors," he said. "That's still an ongoing process here."

The four women filing the lawsuit against state and federal marriage laws hope their effort will inspire boldness among others in the local gay community. They shrug off criticism from several national gay-rights groups who say their lawsuit is so certain to fail that it will be counterproductive.

"We may not prevail, but to run a marathon you have to start taking steps," said Sharon Baldwin, who - like partner Mary Bishop - is an editor at the Tulsa World. "We can't sit back and do nothing."

Baldwin and Bishop, who were heartened by their newspaper colleagues' support, say they have no interest in leaving Oklahoma. Sue Barton said she and her partner did contemplate moving to Chicago or the East Coast after getting a civil union in Vermont in 2001, but now they also intend to stay.

"We have to live smart and careful," she said. "But we don't walk around in fear."

On Dec. 13, about 125 Tulsa gays and their families gathered at a Congregational church for a holiday potluck dinner, trying to shake off the postelection blues with turkey and pie, songs by a gay-lesbian chorus, and a ceremony honoring some of their supporters.

"Each of us is unique," said one of the honorees, Rabbi Charles Sherman. "Those who'd have us fit into some neat category that makes them comfortable - they're wrong. That's not what God wants."

That is just it, the Majority have spoken in more than on are and on more than one occasion, we do not want this and we will not accept this. So now they are trying to come in by the back door, which is the schools.

They are going to convience our children that Homosexuality is a normal thing and is not a sickness, is not wrong, is acceptable, God does not exist or is just irrelevent. We cannot allow this to continue. We must stop this and turn it around.

The Democratic Party , by affiliation with this group has numbered there own days. The may change their Label to Progressive or what ever they like, it's the same agenda.

We must place a tremendous pressure on the Congress and the President, to roll back these Freedom of Speech supressing so called HATE Crime Laws and other Socialist legislation that allows this alternative lifesyle to flourish. We ahve to much to lose, OUR CHILDREN, OUR RELIGIOPNS and OUR COUNTRY.

Some Articles you should find Interesting:

http://waysandmeans.house.gov/hearings.asp?formmode=view&id=954

This is a good one also:

Why Christians and the Church are unable to fight the culture war
Restore America - http://www.noDNC.com ^ | October 23, 2004
Posted on 10/23/2004 1:15:13 AM EDT by woodb01
Why Christians and the Church are unable to fight the culture war
although it's still not too late
October 23, 2004
http://www.nodnc.com

Often, in and out of church walls today, we hear about the apathy of the religious community. Hardly a month goes by that the church is not embroiled in some major controversy to the glee of the anti-christian left. The Church in America has lost its soul. The American church no longer fears God, and no longer loves God.

If this sounds like harsh criticism, I intend to fully support it in just a moment.

First, a little background. Since as far back as I can remember, I was raised in a Baptist Church, in my late teen years, after considerable rebellion, I had an "awakening" to what is meant by being "born again" after getting involved in the Pentecostal / Charismatic movement. Not the typical emotional "born again" experience that many people go through, but a true, life-changing, life-altering event that only an encounter with a living God could have initiated. This event led me to pour over the pages of the Bible for over 20 years, reading it cover to cover many times.

In a direct parallel to the church and our out of control culture today, I was on a roller coaster ride. On the wagon, off the wagon, running after God, running away from God, believing in a Heavenly Father and then having my doubts. Compromise, tolerance, foolishness, and sin were regular occurrences in my life, just like the American Church and American Culture today.

Then one day reading my Bible I stumbled on this:
Proverbs 8:13 The fear of the LORD is to hate evil...
That unnerved me because I didn't HATE evil. I was "tolerant," I was accepting just like all good little secular humanist citizens should be. I knew there was something wrong because if I didn't fear God, then how could I profess to truly be a Christian? Then other verses struck me:
Psalms 97:10 You that love the LORD, hate evil...
Romans 12:9 ...Abhor that which is evil; cleave to that which is good.
Confronted with this harsh reality that I did not HATE evil and therefore did not love or fear God, I was forced to change. My realization forced me to concede that I was headed straight for hell--, just like today's American Culture, and frighteningly enough, the American Church.

HATE, is a passionate thing. HATE is an active thing. You can't be apathetic if you have that passion. Activism and involvement against the causes of evil are the obvious results. Am I advocating violence? NO! Absolutely not! What I am advocating is serious, sincere, and committed activism to confronting and changing the sick and twisted evil in this culture today.

For example, as prayer was taken out of the schools, and abortion became the judge made "law of the land," every pastor and Christian in this country should have been running for Congress for the sole purpose of impeaching the Supreme Court Justices. It should have been the American Church's passion to stop the evils of the anti-christian assaults of American religious tradition and to stop the butcher of innocent human life. But there was nothing.
Today, with the controversy surrounding gay marriage, it hasn't been the Protestant faiths leading the fight, but the Catholic church, family groups, father's groups, and the Republican Party. The American Church's protestants are eerily silent.

Recently the democrats in Congress attempted to pass new "hate crimes" legislation identical to Canada's. In Canada, it is a hate crime to preach against homosexuality, even if you take it directly from the Bible. Yet still the church and christians do nothing.

The church, the family, values, morals, ethics, our children and our country are under attack. A relentless assault is being waged on patriotism and America from treasonous traitors within and still the American Church stands idly by as a spectator. It's time for American Christians to find their passion and their souls. DEMAND that your pastor abide by the Bible and teach what the Bible says about hating evil and if that pastor refuses, that pastor does NOT fear the Lord, and does NOT love God! That pastor must be removed from that position. It's time for the American Church to clean house and once cleaned to stand face to face with the vile anti-christian beast that has arisen in American government and lop the 7 headed hydra's heads off!

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