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To: freemama
It is both. Children, boys and girls, NEED a mother and a father. It is one thing if something happens to one or the other, but even when that is the case, there needs to be a strong gender role model to fill that space, otherwise, they will seek it out, as you say.

I think it is the family dynamic and the fact that solid, stable, two-parent families have become the exception. Many single parents are able to find healthy ways to compensate for the lack of the other parent, but it is never ideal. Children are being raised by day care centers and public schools, which are all too often more part of the problem than of the solution.

There are no easy answers. Those who know right from wrong need to be an example and teach as much as we can, but until there is real change in the hearts of people, I don't foresee things getting any better in the near future. A lot of the children I see having children came from parents who had no parenting either. These kids have all kinds of problems. Many never developed properly in the first place because their basic needs were never met. Many have attachment disorders because they never bonded with their parents. Child neglect has far-reaching consequences, but all too often, society's solution is to put a bandaid on it. No one is willing to confront the root causes because that would fall under "moralizing" and "judging." Well, some behaviors SHOULD be judged.

73 posted on 11/28/2004 12:28:54 PM PST by sweetliberty (Proud member of the Pajama Posse!)
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To: sweetliberty

"No one is willing to confront the root causes because that would fall under "moralizing" and "judging." "

You are so right. I'm watching this happen right across the street. Unmarried mom with 2 kids...boyfriend's a live-in. (some say he's the father) They physically abuse eachother, police arrive, kids are hysterical, etc. etc. I'm new in the neighborhood and to hear the neighbors describe this behavior is unreal. They dance all around it.....but won't JUDGE. Oh, they might judge the boyfriend, but NEVER the stupid mother. "Poor thing" etc. etc. Just but one example.


77 posted on 11/28/2004 1:32:39 PM PST by bonfire
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