LAUGH OF THE WEEK: HILLARY THE EVANGELICAL

Mich News ^ | 11-23-2004 | J. Grant Swank, Jr.

[RepCath]

Proof that the Bush win has brought center stage attention to the Protestant evangelicals in the US is Hillary Rodham Clinton going way over the line in professing that she is in fact a "conservative evangelical."

She was readying for her hubby’s library rained-over opening. In the process, she responded to a church newsletter. In her flowing remarks about returning to the South, being brought up an evangelical, appreciating her roots as a conservative Christian, Hillary simply went overboard. She was redundant, in other words.

Why?

Well, think of 2008.

According to Kevin McCullough, radio talk show host and syndicated columnist, his site states the following quote from Ms. Hillary:

"I always take time to worship God in as evangelical a way as is feasible, given time and location constraints. As you know, I consider myself an evangelical Christian, really a Christian conservative, if you want to know the truth, so it's nice to be 'home' again in the South, which I really consider my quote-unquote home even though I live in New York most of the time. Well, Washington, D.C., most of the time, actually, but if I'm not there I'm in New York, of course, but always thinking about being here, in the South, my spiritual home, where I shared so many wonderful evangelical . . . moments and . . . events."

Evangelicals know their theology. And it does not include pro-choice, pro-practicing homosexual lifestyle, pro-liberal doctrine and so forth. Therefore, there’s no chance that Ms. Hillary could ever find a warm spot in an evangelical pew. No way, except to repent of her spiritual waywardness and reveal it through repeated — over plenty of time — acts of righteousness, the latter defined in the biblical way.

Go, Ms. Hillary, go — to the altar.

---- Email: joseph_swank@yahoo.com

[PeterFinn]

WTF?????

[Bogey78O]

I believe this was a joke by the NRO.

[MHT]

There's enough footage of her ranting and raving at marches about "human rights" like abortion, etc., that her claims would be quickly contradicted.

[warchild9]

Someone needs to ask the Witch Queen if she believes a woman has the right to murder her unborn children. Right to her smirking face. I'll do it. I volunteer.

[Spok]

"I always take time to worship God in as evangelical a way as is feasible, given time and location constraints. As you know, I consider myself an evangelical Christian, really a Christian conservative,"

This kind of talk could hurt her with her base-if they believed her. I can't imagine who she thinks this is going to fool.

[truthseeker2]

{"I always take time to worship God in as evangelical a way as is feasible}

I think that pretty much sums it up.

Feasible - "capable of being used or dealt with successfully"

[Liz]

The piece was published as a satire......but is probably close to the truth as Hillary comtemplates 2008 in light of 2004.

Looks like Hillary's gonna be mighty busy with her Extreme Makeover. The question is---in light of the resounding 2004 Values Voters Victories---how "conservative" will Hillary get? After she opens a charge at Wal-Mart, enrolls in divinity school, and gets a lifetime membership in the John Birch Society, she'll need to get a shopper's card at Sam's Club, and schedule daily morning prayer services in her Senate office, just to make sure she covers all bases.

Maybe Hillary will campaign for 2008 wearing the official
DNC apron, and give Easy-Bake oven demonstrations.

[26lemoncharlie]

I knew this was coming, Anyone with half a brain saw this coming. Hildebeast will do and say anything to get back into the White House. Sorry Hildebeast, we all know who and what you are. Your repentance to gain any credibility would involve a complete and sincere change of heart for you. That will never happen for you.

[GrandEagle]

so it's nice to be 'home' again in the South
I wonder what her constituants think of this new revelation?
To MS Clinton: "Hi, now shut up - pack up- and go home to New York."

[RBroadfoot]

I'm fairly confident this story is a spoof.

[rudyudy]

It demonstrates how dumb some people are in this country. By election time quite a few will think she is very devout.

[PISANO]

I thought she was JEWISH?

[Miss Behave]

Hillary, the SPANISH SPEAKING Evangelical....

You just KNOW that she's learning to speak it at warp speed.

[Eric in the Ozarks]

National Review has a similar piece this week.

[epluribus_2]

My Response to this development

[joesnuffy]

Interesting that you brought this up

Many years ago on one of the big TV Evangelist shows...there was a young woman who was a member of a Christian 'Right to Life" group..

She said, on the show, that she had felt God calling her to speak with Hillary and confront her with exactly that...

During the first inauguration of the Clinton's this pro life woman was able to simply walk passed all security and into the celebration...she was able to simply walk passed Ms Clinton's security and walk right up to her...

Ms Clinton mistook her for someone she knew and patted her hand and said that she was very happy that the woman could make the celebration...

She then spoke these words and these words only to Hillary "Mrs Clinton God does not want you to kill babies"

According to the woman's testimony Hillary's face contorted and her eyes took on a fearful light and she literally 'hissed' back at the woman in a demonic like voice..."God wants us to kill babies"...and then Hillary still staring at the woman walked away...and the woman was allowed to simply walk away and leave the celebration...no one every stopped her or said a word to her...from the time she entered without a pass or a badge of any kind to the time she left..