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Barbara Streisand's Top 10 Explanations For Kerry's Loss (Blog Humor; D&D Refrences Included)
Ace of Spades ^
| 11/11/04
| Ace of Spades
Posted on 11/11/2004 4:37:50 AM PST by KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle
10. Exit polls show that Elves went big for Nader.
9. Bush's Flying Monkeys surpisingly effective at getting out the vote.
8. One word: Cheneymania.
7. Damn Republicans kept making their saving throws against Media Bias.
6 In the house of R'yleh, Dead Cthulhu lies sleeping, except when he mans the phones for the Iowa Republican Party.
5. James Carville, busy with his Crossfire gig, couldn't get down to the bayou and work a little cornpone voodoo.
4. JoBu did not answer our chickenbone prayer. F*ck JoBu.
3. Stupid American voters couldn't grasp the subtle political arguments contained in Papa, Can You Hear Me?
2. Opening speakers of Republican convention -- Smurf-Archenemy Gargamel and Pinhead from Hellraiser -- really "connected" with public.
... and the Number One Barbra Streisand Explanation for Kerry's Loss...
1. Public simply had no confidence in Kerry's constantly-evolving, multiple-position nuance; in D&D terms, they decided to stick with the +3 Holy Avenger that is George Bush, rather than the Dick of Many Things that is John Kerry*
* Why only +3 and not +5? Two reasons: One, we haven't taken out Fallujah yet. But more importantly: I don't run a Monty Haul campaign.
TOPICS: Editorial; Miscellaneous; Political Humor/Cartoons; Politics/Elections
KEYWORDS: aceofspades; barbarastreisand; machineofbabsthemad; reignofwitches
"This reign of witches will pass."
To: KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle
Ace runs one of the two most hysterically funny conservative blogs on the 'net (the other one is Jeff Goldstein's
Protein Wisdom ). If you don't already have his site bookmarked: you're wrong. :)
2
posted on
11/11/2004 4:38:51 AM PST
by
KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle
(I feel more and more like a revolted Charlton Heston, witnessing ape society for the very first time)
To: KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle
3
posted on
11/11/2004 4:39:46 AM PST
by
BushCountry
(IT'S OVER WHEN THE FAT-LADY SINGS... SHE'S SUNG AND AND AND AND... IT'S OVER!!!!!!)
To: BushCountry
Love the graphic! Yours, I take it...? :)
4
posted on
11/11/2004 4:41:17 AM PST
by
KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle
(I feel more and more like a revolted Charlton Heston, witnessing ape society for the very first time)
To: KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle
Yes, if anyone wants a high resolution graphic of it, freep mail me with you email addy.
5
posted on
11/11/2004 4:46:11 AM PST
by
BushCountry
(IT'S OVER WHEN THE FAT-LADY SINGS... SHE'S SUNG AND AND AND AND... IT'S OVER!!!!!!)
To: KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle
I wish she would just go away, like to France of something, and lose her voice permanently so she couldn't talk anymore, that would be funny.
6
posted on
11/11/2004 4:54:18 AM PST
by
kx9088
To: KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle
"This reign of witches will pass.".....in Hollywood, it only just begun.
7
posted on
11/11/2004 4:59:20 AM PST
by
drpix
To: kx9088
Unfortunately, as
South Park reliably informs us: the only thing that can take down the evil MechaSteisand --
... is vocalist Robert Smith, of The Cure. :)
8
posted on
11/11/2004 5:00:41 AM PST
by
KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle
(I feel more and more like a revolted Charlton Heston, witnessing ape society for the very first time)
To: KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle
Also a Major League reference in there, "F* JoBu!"
9
posted on
11/11/2004 5:12:01 AM PST
by
Skywalk
(Transdimensional Jihad!)
To: Dan from Michigan; Constitution Day
4. JoBu did not answer our chickenbone prayer. F*ck JoBu. Major League was a great movie.
10
posted on
11/11/2004 5:13:32 AM PST
by
NeoCaveman
(Don't blame me, I volunteered for Toomey)
To: BushCountry
That is rather striking. Nice work.
To: dubyaismypresident; Skywalk
Major League BTTT! :)
12
posted on
11/11/2004 5:23:07 AM PST
by
KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle
(I feel more and more like a revolted Charlton Heston, witnessing ape society for the very first time)
To: KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle
The last time you posted something from here, I bookmarked the site, but like an idiot, completely forgot about it! (I have a LOT of bookmarks, LOL!) Thanks so much for the reminder!
13
posted on
11/11/2004 5:24:58 AM PST
by
alwaysconservative
(Addicted to FReeping and don't want to be cured.)
To: KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle
"
14
posted on
11/11/2004 5:28:11 AM PST
by
maggief
To: KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle
Love the D&D references. Very Nostalgic.
15
posted on
11/11/2004 5:44:27 AM PST
by
Ragnorak
To: maggiefluffs
Now that looks like a happy couple.
To: Ragnorak
17
posted on
11/11/2004 6:05:28 AM PST
by
KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle
(I feel more and more like a revolted Charlton Heston, witnessing ape society for the very first time)
To: KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle
1. Public simply had no confidence in Kerry's constantly-evolving, multiple-position nuance; in D&D terms, they decided to stick with the +3 Holy Avenger that is George Bush, rather than the Dick of Many Things that is John Kerry*
* Why only +3 and not +5? Two reasons: One, we haven't taken out Fallujah yet. But more importantly: I don't run a Monty Haul campaign. Dangit Kent,
Mountain Dew: Pitch Black was not meant to be forcibly exited your body via the nose....
:)
18
posted on
11/11/2004 6:11:08 AM PST
by
akorahil
(MSM is RIP)
To: maggiefluffs
"I am the perfect reflection of my lover's affection."
19
posted on
11/11/2004 10:02:08 AM PST
by
OESY
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