Posted on 11/09/2004 1:35:22 PM PST by Mike Bates
Received this e-mail from another sad specimen. Can these folks not simply deal with it?
How I Stole Your Election by George W. Bush
The first thing I did to steal your election was to make friends with ALL the manufacturers and code-verifyers of the Electronic Voting Machines. They were really nice, especially Diebold who gave me $600,000 for my campaign. Wow, thanks dude!
(Hyperlink deleted so as to not encourage these morons.)
Next, I had my attack dog, Karl Rove, convince these companies to either alter the vote totals on the central tabulator machines (simple PCs running windows using Remote Access Server -- RAS), or reprogram (via a downloadable software patch) the voting machines themselves so that they would give the advantage to ME! Isn't America great?!? A little money and some religious zealotry goes a looooong, loooong way. Oh, the religious zealotry thing? That's just a cover. I'm not really a Christian -- or at least I don't act like one. Anyway, I digress.
(Hyperlink deleted so as to not encourage these morons.)
Did you ever hear the media complaining about how inaccurate the exit polls were in prior elections? No. That's because they basically ARE accurate. But this election, the exit polls showed Kerry WAY ahead. No problem. My buddies rigged the machines (and all they needed to do was rig it in one state, Ohio, but they took care of at least Florida for me too) not only to make me squeak by in the important battleground states, like Florida and Ohio, but they also made sure that when I did get a state that I was expected to win, the margin was HUGE so that my "popular" vote would make it look like I had a mandate.
So let's recap how the popular vote thing worked again. Let's say we didn't want it to look suspicious by taking states that Kerry really would have won (except for Ohio and Florida, gotta take those! heh heh). So we let him win there, but in order once again to boost the "popular" vote (I put that in quotes because as you know, I'm not REALLY popular), we bring my vote tallies RIGHT UP NEXT to Kerry's, to jack up the "popular" vote as much as possible, even if I didn't win the state.
Then, with states like North Carolina, we know we're going to steal the state anyway (at least according to what the exit polls were telling everyone.... and according to the long, long lines of new voters were telling everyone ... because we all know most of those people were voting for Kerry, not the status quo), so we just jack the crap out of the vote total to REALLY stuff a crapload of "popular" votes in my pocket. You see, this way I can get on the TV and declare that I have a "mandate" and that I'm going to "cash in" on my political "capital" (which I don't really have of course, but we made it look that way).
Here's a nice chart to show you what I mean. Take special note of how the electronic voting machine totals compare to the paper ballot totals. And see what I mean about North Carolina? (Hyperlink deleted so as to not encourage these morons.)
Look folks, if you really want me out of office, first you're going to have to impeach me. But you know what, if you don't have verifiable paper trails at the polls like these folks recommend (Hyperlink deleted so as to not encourage these morons.), and if you don't take these voting machines out of the hands of private companies that are aligned with one end of the political spectrum, then I'm gonna just continue to hose you (and then my brother Jeb will be president too cause we're into this dynasty thing, kind of like my buddies the Saudis... ain't it cool?!?). Also, in 2006, we're going to steal about five more senate seats, and then we'll have the "super-majority". That means the Democrats can't do that confounded fillerbs... fillas.... fillbusters.... CRAP, well, they can't get in the darn way any more and we can pass ANY laws we want about ANYTHING and put whoever we want on the Supreme court. Ha ha, then you're REALLY screwed. So if you don't fix this mess (I mean great system) in two years and have a verifiable voting system nationwide, America is MINE!!!!! (and Jeb's and my daddy's and Cheney's and Rove's... hey, we could even pass a law saying I could be president for FOUR MORE YEARS after 2008! That would be SOOO cool!) Anyway, I digress once again.
Here's one of my favorite sites: (Hyperlink deleted so as to not encourage these morons.)
And that pesky Bev Harris. Man I wish she would go away. If too many of you contribute to her cause, I might just get in trouble so KNOCK IT OFF!!
(Hyperlink deleted so as to not encourage these morons.)
I've said it before and I'll say it again, "Fool me once.....", oh CRAP, I forgot again. Well how about this? "This would be a heck of lot easier if this was [grammar incorrect] a dictatorship.... just so long as I'm the dictator. Heh, heh." Well, sorry to say folks, but I got my way. What are you gonna do about it, huh? Bring it on!!!
(Hyperlink deleted so as to not encourage these morons.)
"Sincerely" Yours, "President" George W. Bush
P.S. Pass it on! I dare ya.
Ah yes. More from the "If I didn't win, then it wasn't fair" contingent.
Wish they'd crawl back under their rocks.
It's so sad, I almost feel ashamed watching them do this.....
Just tell 'em that not only did we steal the 2000 and 2004 elections, we've also rigged it so we're going to steal every election from now on, and there's nothing any of them can do to stop it. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Not really. Would require another constitutional amendment.
'Fess up. It is a little fun just watching them go through the agony, isn't it?
Hey Dems, ever think that maybe you lost despite YOUR party's fraud? That's really pathetic-cheat and STILL LOSE!!
I'm glad I invested in Tin Foil right before the election.
We should elect this guy president!
I worked the election. I also worked the tabulating machines that's been around since 2001. My state went blue because of the coast is so dratted liberal leftist communist demoncRATS. I guess that means the machines worked correctly. (Big Sarc on that last sentence.) Sheesh!
"Can these folks not simply deal with it?"
NOPE!
So this means we will never lose again? Cool.
I respectfully disagree with this lunatic. When I hear the phrase "attack dog" in a political context, I immediately think of James Carville and Lawrence O'Donnell.
Shush! That's our secret.
This is how it starts.
The difference between a law and the Constitution has always been vague in the Lefty's "mind."
Likewise:
These libs will have to go thru the phases of grieving. This email indicates that the author is still in the anger phase. Nothing to do but wait it out.
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