Posted on 11/03/2004 10:00:22 PM PST by CardCarryingMember.VastRightWC
Note: A few weeks ago WeldGOPhardline started a thread called What do you say to a Democrat on Nov. 3 after Bush Wins? Below are a number of responses to his question, with some of my favorites near the top.
You rushed to nomination without a plan to win the election.
Don't blame me, I voted for Nader.
Since Bush was selected in 2000, shouldn't he be able to run again in 2008?
Hey, at least your guy won the debates, huh?
Dean would've won.
What brand of dog food will your parents eat when Bush destroys Social Security?
I hear now that Bush is back in we'll all get to own our own slave!
Halt! Your papers, please...
Well, what do you know? There weren't as many of y'all as you thought!
You must have voted for Buchanan again.
Ha ha ha! That's two we've stolen now!
Now we're going after Kerry's senate seat.
Someday you'll thank me for this.
Don't worry!! You'll be drafted soon!!!
[Use earnest sounding voice]: Gosh, do you think maybe I shouldn't have voted for Bush, after all? Maybe Kerry WAS the best choice.
I voted for Bush. You're welcome.
God has given us a reprieve.
We're just getting started.
You may not appreciate it, but your children will thank me.
Did you hear that all religious symbols are going to be replaced back from where they were taken down?
And did you hear that George W. Bush, like Kerry, is instituting a "litmus test" for all Supreme Court Justice Appointees? They have to be pro-life, and anti-homosexual; welfare will be a thing of the past, and all churches will be allowed to talk about politics and candidates to their hearts' content. And by the way. We're Here, We're Not queer. Get Used To It!!!
Hey, look at it this way...in "Outcome-Based Elections", coming in 2nd is really pretty good!
Well, not everyone can win all the time.
It's not the votes that counts, it's how you played the game.
There's always '08!
Want some champagne?
Were you one of those who voted for Kerry after you decided to vote against him?
Boy, you guys sure know how to pick a winner... Remind me never to listen to you at the race track. Seriously, what in blazes were you guys thinking with this botoxed dud? Oh yeah, he has three Purple Hearts, and the war vet always wins... And everyone loves a middle-aged candidate who snowboards and dresses like a teenager while doing it. And what a dynamic speaker!...
It's November 3rd, are you gonna vote today?
Don't jump!
Can I help pack your bags?
I hear France and Germany are looking for more leftist immigrants.
Air France flights 1192, 491, 288, 751, 216, now boarding...
Canada has universal health care.
Jeb in 2008!
You know, I think Kerry was just a few years ahead of his time. Seriously - You should nominate him again in 2008, and then you'll win for sure!
Yes, nominating Gore and then Kerry may both have been major mistakes. But you know how the old saying goes --- "Mistakes Are Oft Times the Stepping Stones to Failure".
Mission Accomplished!
Bumper Sticker: "Mission Accomplished: '04 President-Elect George W. Bush!"
Don't cry, at least you get to keep your guns and hunt for four more years!
Well, I guess irrational hate wasn't enough after all.
I think it's time to repeal the twenty-second amendment so that W can be elected four times - like FDR.
We're GLAD your MESSAGE got out THIS time!
Isn't Terry McCauliffe the classiest ... Wow, if they just would have run HIM for President"!
Well I'm so glad I voted absentee for Nader in (name narrowest Kerry-lost state). Sure, 2 percent isn't much, but you gotta start somewhere.
All Your Electoral Votes Are Belong To Us!
Hey, aren't you supposed to be in re-education camp?
Better luck next time!
Imagine what you could have done with a real candidate. Someone people actually like.
Strategery Works!
I just love Ralph Nader, don't you?
No, I'm all out of rope. How about some cyanide?
My court's bigger than your court.
I voted once. How many times did you?
Man, am I tired! Been voting all day. Twice downtown, then once at the courthouse, then over to the north end of town, then .....
Here's your mandate!
Now that W has been elected a second time, may I have your tax cut check? After all, you don't want it!
Just think, we won't have to listen to more media spin of "what Kerry was trying to say...." or "Kerry meant to say...."
Should have canvassed a few more cemeteries.
Cheaters never win!
Thumb and index finger shaped in a L.
Stay down, or we'll do it again.
Got crow?
Would you like your dish of crow with, or without, Heinz 57?
YOU AIN'T SEEN NOTHING YET!
LOL!!! Good one!
>> "You may not appreciate it, but your children will thank me."
If I may add to this one, ahem...
"Oh wait! You abort your children, don't you? Oh, well...never mind!"
Show them a pic of the White House with caption, "Whose house is this!?!?!?!"
-PJ
"Your party is sick. Fix it."
Gloaterama Ping
Later that same year, I saw a "Townhall DC" Nightline show where some of the audience repeated this same scurrilous rumor to Koppel. And if I remember correctly, the San Jose Mercury News sometime later did a big "expose" piece where they claimed this was a TRUE rumor, and claimed that the entire operation was run by ex-Contras from Nicaragua. The SJMN management immediately disavowed the entire piece as a fabrication and blamed its publication on the fact that their own "journalist" who wrote it and published it did it during a week when the editor was on vacation and so it didn't go through the normal fact-checking phase where they would have discovered that it was a totally bogus story. But of course this gave the story new life in the black community. I think Maxine Waters used the original SJMN story - and completely ignored the retraction of the story - to start a Congressional investigation into it that of course went nowhere - but just its mere existence perpetuated the rumor further.
Hey! What's wrong with you? Don't you know, it's right there in the Constitoooshun in black and white and 65,536 shades of gray that a woman has a God-given inalienable right to pith her 9-month-old, about-to-be-born baby in the back of the head like a laboratory frog with a sharp scissors! It's right there. Can't you see it? If you place enough different kinds of lights coming from all different directions over your copy of the Constitution, you'll see all sorts of umbras and penumbras that you didn't see before!
If you're still having trouble seeing it, try smoking just the right kinds of mushrooms before you look for those penumbras.
And if you STILL can't see that inalienable right in your copy of the Constitution, then you don't have the right copy. Try to get a copy of the Official US Supreme Court Liberal Faction Constitution And Ouija Board. Besides the Constitution, it has all the letters of the alphabet down the side. The Liberal Soopreems use this to find all kinds of new rights that you woulda never thunk would be in there!
I hear ya! I tried to make it "CardCarryingMember.VastRightWingConspiracy" but that ornery old JimRob wouldn't let me go past 30 letters!!!! So send your complaints to him, not me.
Oops! I forgot to say in my best Foghorn Leghorn voice, "That's a joke, son!"
Or to a Liberal Democrapic woman you could say, "Don't worry about Bush winning. I'm sure you can still return for a full refund the burqa you bought in anticipation of a Kerry win".
One of my Dimwit Co-workers said to me Wed morning "So I guess we're stuck with a**h*le for President, eh?" And I replied with as much feigned shock and distress as I could muster by saying..."Man...you mean KERRY WON??!!??!!" You shoulda seen his face as he spit out "No...Bush did!" It was precious and priceless all at the same time.
WELL WRITTEN.
WOULD BE FUNNY IF IT WASN'T SO TRUE!
Thanks.
Blessings,
Your first PING!!!!
I havent laughed this hard in weeks!!
"After a long campaign doesn't someone have some ketchenup to do?"
Phil
Sarasota
Awesome! Pictures would have been good, too.
Welcome to the 1,000 year Republican Reich
You picked the wrong metro-sexual, at the wrong election, at the wrong time, at the wrong etc...
BWAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Thanks. That was great!!!!!!!!!!
thanks. i assume you were (are) in the military. thanks for your voluntary contributions!
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