Halloween Warning - Trick or Treaters Avoid these Signs of Danger

Today on a local radio show, a Kerry supporter called in who was commenting on the recent Bush ad showing wolves as surrogates for terrorists. This person understood that the wolves were a metaphor, but was still hopping mad that they were used in the spot. His reason? Wolves are really good creatures and he hated to see their good name besmirched by a crass Bush ad! Even though the ad is aimed at making a point about terrorism, his anger was directed at the folks who would use wolves to make that point - not at the terrorists. According to the caller, wolves have been proven by environmentalists and scientists to be good creatures without an aggressive or hostile bone in their bodies. How dare the Bushies compare these creatures to terrorists?

My first reaction was to fall over laughing at the wolfman. You could not have come up with a more comical caricature of a Kerry supporter than this guy. If the folks at SNL heard the caller, you'll find this as a skit on their next show. It was too funny.

But it occurred to me that we might want to use the occasion of his call to point out to parents the danger that could be lurking right down the street as Halloween approaches.

Remember, come Halloween, we'll have many of our precious children out roaming the streets and innocently going up to the houses of strangers. As parents, the last thing we want to do is put our children in any danger by letting them go to houses that might be inhabited by crazed, baying at the moon lunatics.

If the house is horribly run down, the lawn is a jungle, and there are 16 cats on the porch, these are pretty good signs that the house should be avoided. Most caring parents would not let little Johnny and Jane go to these places for a treat. These houses could contain people who might not be stable, and so why take the chance?

After listening to the wolfman today, it occurred to me that there's another danger sign parents should watch out for - the John Kerry for President sign. If you see one of these in the yard, it would be a really good idea to skip this house during your trick or treat fun.

After all, it's well known that Kerry supporters suffer much more than regular folks from a seething, boiling, rolling on the floor and spitting French wine out your nose anger. This in itself could be dangerous, so why take the chance your kid might set them off? All around the country, dozens of Bush supporters have been assaulted, campaign buildings defaced, and signs torn out of the hands of 3 year old girls. At least 95% of the reports of "over the top" misbehavior has been by Kerry supporters.

Not only are these people likely to fly into a rage at the slightest provocation, but they are also unable to come to the simple conclusion that our biggest threat is from terrorists. Kerry supporters frequently believe our biggest threat is from normal Americans. And I'll bet your little trick or treater will look like a normal American kid on Halloween. Will this cause them to go postal? Why take the chance?

Also, Kerry supporters are renowned by their inability to tell right from wrong, good from bad, or our soldiers from our enemies. With this built-in handicap, do you really want to allow your kids to accept candy from them? If they can't tell the difference between a swift boat vet and a terrorist (which one do they hate most?), how do you know they can tell popcorn from cat litter? Better not take the chance.

So please folks, do your friends a favor. Warn them against trick or treating at houses with John Kerry signs. Inside might be a real wicked witch with some strange things in their oven. At the least, you may find a wolfman, ready to spring into action to defend his noble wolf brothers.

I don't think there is any question about which party is supported by terrorists, rapists, murderers, and pedophiles.

It must have been some of the non-hostile and non-aggressive wolves that killed so many deer this summer in Minnesota. I, personally, saw five different kill sites in one very small area. Wolves may not be aggressive towards people, the Forest Service in Minnesota states that there has never been a human attacked. But, they are quite aggressive and hostile towards animals they consider their prey.

....well....we have a Cougar on the lose here in Indianapolis at Fall Creek Park...but my guess is it's John Mellencamp roaming around in his usual dazed stupor.

wolves have been proven by environmentalists and scientists to be good creatures without an aggressive or hostile bone in their bodies.

Nature is cruel.When an animal sees weakness,it takes advantage of the opportunity.Wolves are the perfect animal to use for the ad.They hunt in packs(like terrorists),they pick out the weak(like the terrorists),they kill with no remorse(terrorists).

During "the Zippers" terms,our nation and military was greatly weakened.The wolves took the opportunity that was given to them.

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