Posted on 09/21/2004 10:00:16 PM PDT by Redcoat LI
CBS producer may sleep with the phony fishes By Howie Carr Recent Columns by Howie Carr Wednesday, September 22, 2004
Three words for Dan Rather's producer Mary Mapes:
Witness Protection Program.
Mapes is the one person who can tie together all the loose ends of Rathergate. She is to the DNCBS dirty-tricks unit what Abe ``Kid Twist'' Reles was to Murder Inc. And look what happened to the Kid - he went out the window of the Half-Moon Hotel on Coney Island, the ultimate canary.
One press conference by Mary Mapes and this presidential campaign could be over. She is to Rathergate what John Dean was to Watergate. Which is why it behooves her to be missing. Surely her blood ran cold when she heard that Dan Rather has taken to describing her as a ``great reporter.'' Talk about the kiss of death.
The vast left-wing conspiracy isn't going down without a fight.
You would think Mary Mapes, crack journalist that everyone says she is, would understand the peril she's in. But she's obviously not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree. I mean, even the Globe could see through Bill Burkett - the Globe! She checked out nothing before green-lighting the hoax for the benefit of the Kerry campaign. She set up the phone call between her crackpot source and the Clintonite sleaze Joe Lockhart. As someone said yesterday, forget the smell test, this hoax didn't pass the laugh test. The Weekly World News has higher journalistic standards than ``60 Minutes.''
Of course, it'll be tough for her to leave behind her fabulous career as Dan Rather's top flimflam gal. She'd already worked her way up to the top of Rather's personal fraud squad and was looking forward to becoming manager of the prestigious ``60 Minutes'' forgery unit.
Some on the Internet, such as conservative blogger John Ellis, have advised her to hire a lawyer and an agent. The lawyer, for the frame the CBS suits are so clearly fitting her for, and the agent for the inevitable book deal. But there's plenty of time for her memoirs, ``Forging Ahead at CBS,'' or ``Putting the BS into CBS.''
But it's over for CBS. Compared to Dan Rather, Ted Baxter looks like Edward R. Murrow. The DNC has gone from plausible deniability to nonplausible deniability.
Bill Burkett would be a better witness than Mapes in the upcoming criminal trials, but Dupe Throat is even nuttier than Dan Rather. The ``unimpeachable source'' now says he's suing CBS, which means Viacom can ``settle out of court.'' Burkett's latest tall tale is that he got the documents from a woman named ``Lucy Ramirez.''
Has anyone ever seen ``Lucy Ramirez'' and Mary Mapes in the same room together?
According to her own father, Mapes is a ``radical feminist.'' I've seen her picture - let's just say that a photo spread in Playboy is not in the cards once she gets the bum's rush out of Black Rock. But among the perks of the Witness Protection Program is plastic surgery, if necessary. And then the feds will try to relocate Miss Mapes to a place where she can feel at home. Have you ever visited Jamaica Plain, Mary?
I tried to reach out to a couple of people I know who've been in the program to see if they had any tips for the disgraced ditz. First I called Henry Hill in L.A., but his phone's disconnected and he's moved to Nebraska. Then I phoned Fat Tony Ciulla in Malden. His phone's disconnected, too.
Poor Mary Mapes - the loony left-winger may not realize that this is her future. She may even try to hang in at CBS for another few days. My final advice, Mary: If Dan Rather says he's putting you up at the Half-Moon Hotel, tell him to forget about it. Tell him you'll be staying with a dear friend of yours.
Lucy Ramirez.
I had a dog namned Butch. True story.
She won't be taking the fall; she is even more guilty than Rather is. Producers do most of the real leg work putting together TV news stories, particularly on magazine shows like "60 Minutes." The anchors and reporters are sometimes brought in only to do the on-camera stuff after the producer has already put the rest of the piece together.
(Of course, in this particular case, it's obvious Rather was far more involved than merely sitting down to do voiceovers written by somebody else; I'm just saying that at best, the actual work of creating a TV news package is shared by the on-air guy and the behind-the-scenes producer. No producer, no story. By the way, when Peter Arnett was fired from CNN for the fraudulent Tailwind story, his so-called defense was "They just brought me in to appear on camera as the front man!")
This is not to say that men like Rather, Heyward et al do not also deserve to be fired, just that Mapes isn't going to be a scapegoat. She did it.
bttt
Ping--here's your guy Carr in case you hadn't already seen it.
Newsflash....Mary Mapes sinks John Kerry's swiftboat....developing......
She sounds like just another of those continuously forward-leaning triple-A type personalities who advances through chutzpah and pressure rather than intellectual capacity and talent.
This is going to be fun - looney liberals eating liberal loonies...
I think she did. Remember, CBS said that they approached Burkett, and not the other way around.
Too funny. This article was a pleasure to read.
If that crazy bastard Burkett had bought a vintage typewriter, they would have gotten away with it. The LSM has been carrying the water for the Democrats so long, they've become completely unhinged from reality. Sinton survived on spin and spin alone.
Are not we all so happy for lawyers!
A bet that the Clinton lawyer who had a hand in setting this up thought his piece in making this Killian's PRIVATE FILES, thought that was his masterstroke. You see, as private files, the forgeries are not forgeries of military files or documents. I think that is being somewhat overlooked. Again, you can count on a lawyer to do his part for goodness.
bttt
I understand what you're saying and Mapes is just as guilty for her part in all this as Rather and Heyward. I was stressing that She shouldn't be the only one with the pinkslip. And how the names being pointed at are Mapes and this Ramirez person (if she's real). Which removes Lockhart, Burkett and a host of other men from the focal point hiding behind these skirts.
Just my perspective.
Thank you. I love Howie's columns, and I really love his radio show.
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