Yep, paying respect to the nation you live in is one step away from Nazi Germany. Totalitarianism, by cracky.
Paying one's respects can and should be voluntary. I have nothing against that.
Of course there's more to totalitarianism than just coerced loyatly oaths. Totalitiarian states disrespect the rights of their inhabitiants in a number of ways. However, coerced (the part you conveniently forgot to address) loyalty oaths are a defining characteristic of every oppressive state I can think of.