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More women are taking husbands’ names
New Hampshire Union Leader ^ | August 10, 2004 | RICH LOWRY

Posted on 08/10/2004 6:00:00 AM PDT by presidio9

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To: presidio9
It's all about Family. When a woman takes her husband's name, it is a signal to the world that she is in a committed relationship with one man, and that any offspring are his. This is a very important social function, especially before the advent of paternity tests. A female always knows whose children were hers; a male can never be 100% sure without DNA tests.

Taking on the family name, therefore, is a form of acknowledgment that the woman's children are her husband's, and so obligate him to commit to their wellbeing.

OTOH, unwillingness to take the husband's (and familial) name is a signal to the world that the woman considers her individuality more important than her family ties.
61 posted on 08/10/2004 7:25:37 AM PDT by LexBaird (This opinion was tagged and released into the wild. Please report all sightings.)
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To: Centurion2000

"A woman that won't take your name when she marries is not worth marrying."

A man that won't take his wife's name when he marries may not be worth marrying, either. Why is his name more valid than hers? I took my husband's name -- but he considered taking mine instead. Mine is easier with a strong heritage, and his is a result of his dad's adoption. It's ridiculous to believe that women should take their husband's name and give up their identities. Maybe it was fine in the days when they were husbands' property. But now, when husbands send their wives off to bring home the bacon, that makes them equal. The name thing is an option, it should be an option, and women who keep their own family names should not be criticized. It's part of who they are.


62 posted on 08/10/2004 7:27:07 AM PDT by MayflowerMadam
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To: cwiz24
Because me not taking his name shows other men that he has no control over his wife?

And there it is ladies and gentlemen. The real reason the she keeps her own last name. Thank you for finally getting to the meat of the issue. All that "interesting last name, too lazy to change it, want old friends to find me" was bull or mostly bull. Thats the reason a woman wants to keep her last name.

So what we have learned is this. Your husbands last name is superficial and means nothing in the grand scheme but your last name is special and proves to the world you are independant of your husband. You are in control of you destiny. The reason we all know this is because you kept your Dads last name instead of your husbands.

So in closing, last names do mean something after all. It can mean "I am part of a family under the same name and I respect my husband " or " I am part of a family but look at me I am special because I have a different name. My husband does not rule over me and I am my own woman. Hey everyone ask me about it".

63 posted on 08/10/2004 7:27:48 AM PDT by normy (Just cause you think you can box, doesn't mean you're ready to climb in the ring with Ali.)
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To: normy
Cliff:

Normy, you're not going to take that from Diane are you?

64 posted on 08/10/2004 7:28:27 AM PDT by demlosers
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To: cwiz24

I know how to address them, it's just a pet-peeve...an irritation. I'm a traditionalist and don't like feminist ideals and attitude that usually come with someone that won't take the husband's last name.


65 posted on 08/10/2004 7:29:21 AM PDT by samiam1972 (Live simply so that others may simply live!)
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To: N. Theknow
*****"Actually from my experience, I have noticed that women of quality don't have to seek equality." *****

I love it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

66 posted on 08/10/2004 7:29:38 AM PDT by mrs tiggywinkle (AMERICA, LAND OF THE FREE **BECAUSE** OF THE BRAVE.)
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To: normy
Cliff:

That's the way Normy. :)

67 posted on 08/10/2004 7:29:39 AM PDT by demlosers
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To: School of Rational Thought

What do the gays do?
>>>

You really don't want to know. Trust me on this.


68 posted on 08/10/2004 7:29:47 AM PDT by Shaddap IV
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To: LexBaird

Um...I hardly think that just because you take your husband's name that that precludes you from cheating and possibly getting pregnant. Is there some law of nature that I'm not aware of?

I consider my individuality very important and my husband and I are a family. I also have a family in my parents and grandparents, who will be a part of my children's lives. Why should the "family ties" be with the husband's family?

Regardless of who has who's name, we are all happy and we all support one another. Parenthetically, my husband didn't mind that I didn't change my name. And, no, he's not a liberal.


69 posted on 08/10/2004 7:30:23 AM PDT by cwiz24
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To: Xenalyte
Jane Anne Smith, on marrying Fred Rogers ...

gets to be my neighbor. Wouldn't you like to be my neighbor, too?

Can you say "heraldry" boys and girls? Very good ...

70 posted on 08/10/2004 7:31:59 AM PDT by ArrogantBustard (Western Civilisation is aborting, buggering, and contracepting itself out of existence.)
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Comment #71 Removed by Moderator

To: normy

I never said that I didn't change my name to show people that my husband has no control over me. I was supposing that that's what you thought. Maybe you should read my posts a little more carefully.

And I can speculate just as much (not knowing you, of course) as to why you are so adamant about wives changing their names. Perhaps you feel threatened in your masculinity?


72 posted on 08/10/2004 7:33:14 AM PDT by cwiz24
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To: cwiz24
I don't love my husband any less because I didn't take his name. Our children will have his name. But I don't believe that taking your husband's name makes you any better (or worse) of a wife.

Exactly. I didn't change my last name because my husband's is a pain. It wasn't on principle; I'd have changed it for a more easily spelled name! Our children have my husband's last name, which (means I end up spelling it for people several times a day anyway, defeating my original purpose). However, at this point, I just don't want to go to the trouble of re-doing all the paperwork

73 posted on 08/10/2004 7:33:22 AM PDT by Tax-chick ("The short, gray-haired lady, with all the kids.")
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To: Xenalyte
And don't expect ME to approve when you start dissing Frank Zappa.

Dittos.

I wonder how many here know the answer to Zappa's question "What's the Ugliest Part of Your Body" ?

He was a brilliant satirist, and gave the most appropriate reply to a congressional committee I ever heard.

74 posted on 08/10/2004 7:33:33 AM PDT by jimt
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To: wideawake

I don't think you can classify keeping a maiden name as a middle name the same way as keeping a maiden surname or hyphenating. I use my maiden name as my middle name simply because my middle name at birth wasn't one I much cared for... and it was a nice, private way to preserve the connection to my maiden name. Since I generally use just a middle initial (if that) it isn't a big statement making issue. Actually, as another poster noted, I think it is very traditional for a woman to keep her maiden name as a middle name. Is it that different from using a mother's maiden name as her son's middle name? That's pretty common... especially among presidents. JFK, LBJ, I think Ronald Reagan.... Since a middle name has little legal signficance, I don't see any big deal about it, nor does my husband.


75 posted on 08/10/2004 7:33:54 AM PDT by GraceCoolidge
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Comment #76 Removed by Moderator

To: demlosers

Thank you sir.


77 posted on 08/10/2004 7:34:38 AM PDT by normy (Just cause you think you can box, doesn't mean you're ready to climb in the ring with Ali.)
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To: presidio9
If every body did hyphenated names in 2 generations you would see:

Born today: Maryjane Harmon-Smith-Rodham-Thomas, daughter of James Harmon-Smith and Tiffany Rodahm-Thomas.

78 posted on 08/10/2004 7:34:39 AM PDT by Semper Paratus
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To: presidio9

Uh, I thought you were supposed to take your husbands' name after you married (sarcasm).........I took my Hubby's name and have proudly used it for the last 38 years! These women libbers just don't get it and I think the fat lady is about to sing. There's a new generation of women out there who are finding there is a better way as far as family values and seeing the libbies for what they really are. IMHO.


79 posted on 08/10/2004 7:35:13 AM PDT by Dawgreg (Happiness is not having what you want, but wanting what you have.)
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To: FrankWild

Interesting on how you think conservative people need to believe everything that you do. Should we all just goose-step down the center of the street, conforming to every conservative ideal? That is ridiculous. Conservatives come in all shapes and colors and every conservative doesn't have a handy checklist in his pocket showing what he should believe in.


80 posted on 08/10/2004 7:35:21 AM PDT by cwiz24
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