1 posted on 08/04/2004 9:59:50 AM PDT by EggsAckley

sKerry - "I have one word for my Iowa constituents...Cornahol!"

Teresa - "Great! Can you pour me a glass?"

36 posted on 08/04/2004 10:12:06 AM PDT by BossLady (Kerry/Edwards - They talk so much crap you need two Johns.......)

Beavis: "I am Cornholio!" heh-heh!

40 posted on 08/04/2004 10:14:13 AM PDT by CounterCounterCulture (Anagram of my screenname: TRUE UNCLE TRUER COCONUT)

If her heinous Mama T doesn't know what Chili is, what is the chance this dork even knows what he is holding? I am sure he thinks corn comes from a can and chocolate milk comes from the black cows..

41 posted on 08/04/2004 10:14:37 AM PDT by IamConservative (A man who stands for nothing will fall for anything.)

To: EggsAckley; MeekOneGOP

44 posted on 08/04/2004 10:16:13 AM PDT by mikrofon (JF'nK as sKerryCrow: "Stay out da' corn!")

48 posted on 08/04/2004 10:18:40 AM PDT by RogerWilko

"I can't believe I have to ride a bus and listen to my dorky husband pretend to like a bunch of people who eat that stuff they call chili"

56 posted on 08/04/2004 10:21:48 AM PDT by gubamyster

I KNOW, I know who she reminds me of...an female version of OZZIE OSBOURNE!!!!

Look at her stupid gaping mouth, her silly accent and talking pattern and her irrational and unpredictable behavior....

57 posted on 08/04/2004 10:22:09 AM PDT by antivenom ("Never argue with an idiot, he'll bring you down to his level - then beat you with experience.")

Nice, but not as good as the Oompa Loompa pic. from NASA.
Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-dee-do
I have a perfect puzzle for you
Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-dee-dee
If you are wise, you'll listen to me

What do you get when you guzzle down sweets?
Eating as much as an elephant eats
What are you at getting terribly fat?
What do you think will come of that?

I don't like the look of it

Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-dee-da
If you're not greedy, you will go far
You will live in happiness too
Like the Oompa Loompa doom-pa-dee-do

Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-dee-do
I have another puzzle for you
Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-da-dee
If you are wise, you'll listen to me

Gum chewing's fine when it's once in a while
It stops you from smoking and brightens your smile
But it's repulsive, revolting, and wrong
Chewing and chewing all day long

The way that a cow does

Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-dee-da
Given good manners, you will go far
You will live in happiness too
Like the Oompa Loompa doom-pa-dee-do

Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-dee-do
I have another puzzle for you
Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-da-dee
If you are wise, you'll listen to me

Who do you blame when your kid is a brat?
Pampered and spoiled like a Siamese cat
Blaming the kids is a lie and a shame
You know exactly who's to blame

The mother and the father

Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-dee-da
If you're not spoiled, then you will go far
You will live in happiness too
Like the Oompa Loompa doom-pa-dee-do

Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-dee-do
I have another puzzle for you
Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-da-dee
If you are wise, you'll listen to me

What do you get from a glut of TV?
A pain in the neck and an IQ of three
Why don't you try simply reading a book?
Or can you just not bear to look?

You'll get no...you'll get no...you'll get no commercials

Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-dee-da
If you're not greedy, you will go far
You will live in happiness too
Like the Oompa Loompa doom-pa-dee-do

59 posted on 08/04/2004 10:23:46 AM PDT by ottersnot (Kill a commie for your mommie, Visualize getting off your' liberal ass and getting a job)

67 posted on 08/04/2004 10:28:26 AM PDT by LiberalBassTurds (Al Qaeda needs to know we are fluent in the "dialogue of bullets.")

Take this cob and shove it.

70 posted on 08/04/2004 10:38:15 AM PDT by NRA2BFree (Life is not about how fast you run, or how high you climb, but how well you bounce.)

He could grip it by the husks.

It's not a question of where he grips it, it's all a matter of weight ratios.....

75 posted on 08/04/2004 10:44:21 AM PDT by Petronski (It's a man's life in the Cardiff Rooms, Libya)

My first thought was of Linda Lovelace and "Debbie Does Dallas"

(Wonder where MY MIND is?)

76 posted on 08/04/2004 10:48:01 AM PDT by Ro_Thunder (Sarcasm? That's humor lost on anyone but yourself.)

Next Tuh-ray-za will be jabbing her bony talons at some reporter saying "That never happened".

77 posted on 08/04/2004 10:48:45 AM PDT by fortunecookie (VOTE Bush-Cheney '04)

At first glance I thought that was Mama T just behind Kerry, but on closer inspection I swear to God it's gotta be Charlie McCarthy.

79 posted on 08/04/2004 10:54:11 AM PDT by finnigan2

81 posted on 08/04/2004 10:57:17 AM PDT by RippleFire ("It was just a scratch")

The perfect caption: "I LOVE TO IOWA CORNHUSKER FOOTBALL!"

84 posted on 08/04/2004 11:08:38 AM PDT by Prolifeconservative (If there is another terrorist attack, the womb is a very unsafe place to hide.)

"Of course I plan to open this end, unless I decide I need to open that end!"

86 posted on 08/04/2004 11:14:02 AM PDT by Gritty ("Liberals always claim to know exactly what to do as soon as it's too late"-Ann Coulter)

88 posted on 08/04/2004 11:15:06 AM PDT by Ironclad

"---and here! have a complimentary pod. Put it in your basement and overnight...you'll be a Kerry voter!"

90 posted on 08/04/2004 11:18:05 AM PDT by Graymatter (Countdown---90 more days.)

Hey John, there's a Gargoyle looking over your shoulder!

92 posted on 08/04/2004 11:23:44 AM PDT by subterfuge (Liberalism is, as liberalism does.)

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