Martha Stewart Living Hell -

www.smartmoney.com ^ | MAY 2004 | JOHN QEENAN

[RedBloodedAmerican]

This was written post-trial, pre-sentencing. But thought it deserved posting.

[RedBloodedAmerican]

Ping!

[Neets]

HA!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Destructor]

Look for Martha Stewart's tips for decorating your cell in the next issue!

[Thebaddog]

Referring to us "little people" is New York Stooopid. If she had some smarts from the Midwest, she'd shut up now, and do the time as fast as possible. And then maybe we'd be in the mood to buy her stuff even though a convicted felon can't run the show anymore.

And she had better learn about overexposure as fast as possible.

[Nick Danger]

Decorate Martha's Cell Photoshop Contest

[RedBloodedAmerican]

"Blue light special, cell block C!"

[FoxPro]

Somebody should have proof read this before publication.

[RedBloodedAmerican]

Why so?

[FoxPro]

or in order to raise cash to buy and apartment for a beloved child

You dont buy "and apartment".

[RedBloodedAmerican]

Ebonics

[RedBloodedAmerican]

I was watching those. They also did one on her last year, I think. Pretty nice. I was trying to figure out the landscape out the window.

[whereasandsoforth]

As long as Bill Clinton walks free, our prisons should be empty. Bill Clinton did more damage to our way of life than any coke-snorting murderer. Justice spit us all in the eye the day he walked away to make a fortune.

Put Clinton in jail or let everybody else go...until then don't tell me how Martha Steward should be in lock-up.

Martha sold some stock. Clinton sold national secrets. Martha sold crabcakes. Clinton lied under oath to a grand jury. And by the way, that was Martha's crime. She lied to the FBI.

[annyokie]

Chili for a Crowd recipes in the side column.

[randog]

After the trial, one juror said the jury had viewed the presence of O'Donnell in the courtroom as a personal insult. Some of us view her presence in this society the very same way.

LOL!!

[Chieftain]

Really, really think twice about bringing Rosie O'Donnell into the courtroom. And if she insists on coming, make doubly sure she doesn't bring Boy George. You don't want to provoke the judge into giving you life without parole.

Martha is on Larry king Alive tonight and she is sooooooooo pitiful. What a whiner!

I hope the inmates at Danbury Prison get to see this interview before she arrives. Martha will get some schoolin' from them, and wish she had Rosie with her, as they would probably fear Rosie!

[RedBloodedAmerican]

She is making all these appearances in order to sway opinion for her appeal.

[glockmeister40]

Let's add some roommates. Big, hairy, sweaty, extra-chromosome diesels. Panting, lusting matrons with velvet nightsticks. Martha's dance card will be full. Every night. After the lights go dim.

[Lael]

Martha sold some stock. Clinton sold national secrets.

Which sales were reported, and DEFENDED at the time!!!

RED CHINA was "HELL BENT for LEATHER" to develop the NEUTRON BOMB!!

Clinton's choice was [1] ignore the fallout from their ultimately successful development, albiet with Multiple ATMOSPHERIC TESTS, or [2] give the RED CHINESE the computer codes to [A] help them, and [B] avert a whole GENERATION hooked on Strontium 90!!!

[NYCVirago]

Has-beens like O'Donnell have a hard time understanding that once the American public decides they don't like you anymore, they immediately deny that they ever liked you.

Ain't that the truth!