"They already have tolerance....benefits..."
The issue of benefits is perhaps the best argument against gay marriage that I've heard of. Its also one of the main reasons why I don't think government should be involved with marriage - too much involvement by the government in our personal lives. The catholic church example's good. I guess if the church gets tax money to do their work (Faith-based initiative, which I support btw) then they should have to give benefits if it is required by law. However, its diametrically opposed to their views, which creates a serious burden for them. I don't have a very good solution for this.
Its interesting that they hired the gay guy in the first place. Discrimination based upon sexuality is not against the law. So it seems to me that they've taken it upon themselves to provide for that gay persons' spouse. Perhaps if the guy comes to them and says, "I'm gay - give me benefits" they could just fire him? They could in Virginia. They can fire you in Virginia for your taste in movies.
"Discrimination based upon sexuality is not against the law"
Yet. But it soon will be