Male Marital Outlook Linked to Upbringing

Yahoo/AP ^ | 6/24/2004 | DAVID CRARY

[glaseatr]

Who goes into a marriage thinking about divorce?

My ex-wife.

[cyborg]

How sad :(

[glaseatr]

True, But I have been happily married this time for 13yrs. So I'm glad the ex-wife thought like that.

[Tax-chick]

I spent my formative years reading Barbara Cartland novels, but still managed to marry a normal, human man with lots of potential. After 15 years, I can honestly say that I think the next 15 will be better than the first (even if we have 6 more children :-).

I agree with you about Dr. Laura. Although I haven't yet read the most recent book (note to self, library list), the discussions I've read suggest that its approach to men is rather shallow: "You should treat your husband with respect ... even though he's a primitive creature interested only in food, sports, and sex." (This, btw, is exactly what my Japanese professor in college said about Japanese men ... she married an American!)

My husband is a much more complex and interesting person than that, and if our sons turn out like their father, they will be ... not perfect, but well above average, with personalities that will interest any woman who's not a total twit.

[cyborg]

Well I hear it's sometimes better the second time around.

[glaseatr]

It's only better when your blessed with the right mate, as I am.

By the way..nice homepage..WOW.

[kstewskis]

Nice to see some american women are starting to understand. Have a nice day ma'am.

Trust me, there are a lot more of us in the wings than you realize. We're just quiet about it, thats all.

[kstewskis]

When it comes to women, my heart is a bad decision-maker. So I don't trust women and I don't trust myself. Therefore, I stay single which is easy because women don't trust me.

Shame. You just described someone I know to a "T", because of screwy women who (helped) mess up his past too.

Good men ruined by screwy women, who ruin it for the rest of us (honest) ones.

[Tax-chick]

An interesting book on this subject:

What could he be thinking? : how a man's mind really works / by Gurian, Michael. St. Martin's Press, 2003. Call #: 305.31

Subject Topic: Men -- Psychology. Interpersonal relations.

Summary: Addresses the concerns of women about the men in their lives, presenting a profile of the male psyche to shed light on the nuances of men's actions and thoughts in modern culture.

****************

I thought this was very informative, regarding how men's brains work - just as well as women's :-), but with different objectives. Example: "Why can't he find anything in the refrigerator?" "Because his brain identifies size and movement of objects more than shape and color. Therefore, he can't see the mustard, because it isn't moving."

I don't recommend this without reservations, but it's VERY interesting, when it sticks with what can be observed using the latest technology, about the functioning of men's and women's brains.

[CyberCowboy777]

I am the second of 9.

A baseball team.

[gawatchman]

"You should treat your husband with respect even though he's a primitive creature interested only in food sports and sex."

No Dr Laura, it's just that we aren't interested in much of the same nonsense that many women are.

[Prime Choice]

One critic said such assertions were too broad, fostering illusions about traditional families and overlooking the nuanced attitudes of those raised by divorced parents.

"Nuanced" must be the new euphemism for "ridiculously dysfunctional."

Nuanced? My aching foot.

[Tax-chick]

Women aren't always interested in nonsense (and unless they're leftists, older women are usually more sensible than younger ones!).

I'd rather spend an evening with my husband talking about the best leadership strategies for his Cub Scout den (after all, it could help me with my Brownie Girl Scouts, and some of the Cubs are my sons ...), than talking about "my feelings." And we can watch a John Wayne video at the same time ... although if I've had a few glasses of wine, you'll have to listen to me go on about how my Dad is just like John Wayne ...

In summary, stereotypes are harmful for all relationships ... both feminist stereotypes, and Dr. Laura's minimalist view of men.

[CyberCowboy777]

I am an interesting, successful and intelligent man and I still think about food, < insert hobby > and sex an inordinate amount of the time. LOL!

My wife is a wonderful women who takes care of me because she wants me to successful, happy and have time for her and our children.

We make strong team.

[Mark17]

While most single young men aspire to marriage, about one-fifth are deeply skeptical of the institution and their prospects of making it work

I thought the percentage would be much greater than one-fifth.

[CzarNicky]

"I thought the percentage would be much greater than one-fifth."

That one fifth was not the pioneers willing to take the arrows but the ones who stood back and waited til the coast was clear.

[John Lenin]

Nuance is code word for anything goes.

[Tall_Texan]

I thought the percentage would be much greater than one-fifth.

But this is a survey of 25-34 year olds so they haven't built up the experience yet to be so skeptical.

[Tax-chick]

It all depends on your perspective, I guess. (How's that for a "nuanced" comment?)

[CyberCowboy777]

That'll work

*grin*