Court labels father deadbeat after not being able to pay 156% of salary for child support...

ifeminist.com ^ | 6-15-04 | Larry White

[kiki04]

Jailing Fathers Who Can't Afford Braces

(or why Charlottesville, Virginia is NOT the “Best Place to Live in America” for Divorced Fathers)

by Larry White

On March 30, 2004, Frommer's Cities Ranked and Rated gave Charlottesville, Virginia the rating of “Best Place to Live in America.” But, as a divorced father who's gone through Charlottesville's “family court” system I know that Frommer's rating is a long way from the real truth.

By way of introduction, I am a fifty-one-year-old divorced father of five children and computer analyst living in Charlottesville, Virginia. My second oldest son, Daniel, is a former student at Tandem Friends School, a nationally acclaimed private Quaker school in Charlottesville. He was sentenced to eight years in prison August 2003 for his tragic involvement in drug-related crimes that occurred, sadly, less than six months after his graduation from high school.

This story is about my attempts to come to the aid of my troubled son, Daniel, in the months before his arrest. This is also the story of my experiences of being a father with a son in prison, interwoven with my own legal encounters with our “family court” system. More generally, this article is about the enormous legal obstacles facing hundreds of thousands of divorced fathers in our society today. These fathers who try to maintain close ties with their children post-divorce often face a legal system that routinely discriminates against them and damages their relationships with their children.[1]

I dedicate this article to my son Daniel, the thousands of divorced fathers who've already lost contact with their children through no fault of their own, and all the children of divorce.

On a personal note: it is impossible to convey the deep pain I continue to feel as a parent, knowing of my son's involvement in violent criminal acts, actions which run counter to every moral value I've ever tried to instill in my children.

[Rebelbase]

Up your alley.

[goodnesswins]

"The same Charlottesville court that ordered my high child support payments also refused to enforce its own visitation orders while I was living in California – leaving me with a sense of uncertainty and doubt as to my ability to see my kids whenever I came to Charlottesville for “visitation.”"

YEP....standard operating procedure.....get the money, but don't let the kids see their parent.

[E Rocc]

Peatross sounds like the kind of "judge" who thinks his position makes him a Deity, and is strongly deserving of removal, if not counter-harrasment.

-Eric

[FlipWilson]

Hmmm, I wonder why fewer males are getting married? What the Judge did in this case, however, was just wrong. I wonder why this guy did not appeal. I know of no state that imputes income based upon a former job. Evidently, I now know of one.

[kiki04]

My uncle had to fight tooth and nail to get decent visitation with his children... now he has 50/50 custody, and his oldest daughter wants to live exclusively with him.

[Delphinium]

So glad my son moved his family of 6 out of Virginia .

[Red Badger]

Shakespeare was right------500 YEARS AGO!.........

[Rebelbase]

I thank God that I adopted a "long term" stragety for insuring I had access to my kids when I separated from my exwife 9 years ago.

I kissed ass for years, paid through the nose but I got to see my kids on a regular basis.

Nine years later the oldest one comes and goes at his discression (my recommendation) and the youngest one lives with me full time. The mom is in couseling for substance abuse issues.

She would owe me child support If I pressed the issue. But pressing the issue would mean she would make life hell for my younger son, who really only wants to see her at most once a week for dinner.

She's scared to death I'm gonna file for child support. Last week she took my son to breafast and told him "this isn't a bribe, but if you come back and live with me two nights a week, I'll buy you all new stuff for your room and get you a new computer".

[EggsAckley]

Larry White, divorced father and devoted non­-custodial parent, resides in Charlottesville, Virginia with his wife and part-time with his three younger children.

Quite a house that the poor guy has to live in.

Something about the article doesn't sit right with me.

[greccogirl]

In the photo is that his house he is standing in front of? If it is, he isn't being truthful.

[jscd3]

Quite a house that the poor guy has to live in.

I'm assuming that you know that the house in the photograph is Monticello and you just forgot the "I'm Kidding" tag at the end

You could be right, there is usually (but not always) more to the story...

[kiki04]

I thought it was the court house... the doors aren't house doors they are big glass office doors, but who knows.

[Smogger]

Um.. that looks like a courthouse or the entrance to a prison. It certainly DOESN'T look like residence.

[najida]

Erm,
He is standing in front of Monticello....

OK, he COULD be related to Thomas Jefferson...
or had a house built EXACTLY like it....
but I doubt it.

[jscd3]

In the photo is that his house he is standing in front of? If it is, he isn't being truthful.

The house in the photo is Monticello

[kiki04]

Thanks :) I knew it looked familiar... duh, I thought it was courthouse, haven't been there for about 20 years...

[XRdsRev]

Uhh, that is not his house. The house is Monticello, home of Thomas Jefferson, which is in Charlottesville, Virginia.

[EggsAckley]

Having never been to Virginia, I have no idea what Monticello looks like. There are lots and lots of brick houses like the one in the photo in pictures I've SEEN from Virginia, and the caption under the photo sort of IMPLIES that he lives in that house.



Mea Culpa.