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"Y'allbonics"
Not known

Posted on 05/18/2004 8:09:41 AM PDT by OldBlondBabe

Not to be outdone by Ebonics in California, the Southern Association of Colleges & Schools is requesting billions of federal dollars to teach "Y'allbonics" in all classrooms south of the Mason-Dixon line. Included here are some samples of "Y'allbonics." If you do not understand any of them, contact a Southerner for an explanation.

HEIDI: (noun) Greeting.

HIRE YEW: (complete sentence) Remainder of greeting. Usage: "Heidi, hire yew?"

BARD: (verb) Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow." Usage: "My brother bard my pickup truck."

JAWJUH: (noun) The state north of Florida. Capital is Lanner. Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck."

BAMMER: (noun) The state west of Jawjuh. Capital is Berminhayum. Usage: "A tornader jes went through Bammer an' left $20,000,000 in improvements."

MUNTS: (noun) A calendar division. Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck, and I ain't herd from him in munts."

THANK: (verb) Cognitive process. Usage: "Ah thank ah'll have a Coke."

RANCH: (noun) A tool used for tight'nin' bolts. Usage: "I thank I leff my ranch in the back of that pickup truck my brother from Jawjuh bard a few munts ago."

ALL: (noun) A petroleum-based lubricant. Usage: "I sure hope my brother from Jawjuh puts all in my pickup truck."

FAR: (noun) A conflagration. Usage: "If my brother from Jawjuh don't change the all in my pickup truck, that thing's gonna catch far."

TAR: (noun) A rubber wheel. Usage: "I hope that brother of mine from Jawjuh don't git a flat tar in my pickup truck."

TIRE: (noun) A tall monument. Usage: "Lord willin' and the creek don't rise, Ah sure hope to see that Eiffel Tire in Pars sometime."

RETARD: (verb) To stop working. Usage: "My grampaw retard at age 65."

FARN: (adjective) Not domestic. Usage: "I cuddint unnerstand a wurd he sed .must be from some farn country."

DID: (adjective) Not alive. Usage: "He's did, Jim."

ARE: (noun) A colorless, odorless gas; oxygen. Usage: "He cain't breathe give 'im some ARE!"

BOB WAR: (noun) A sharp, twisted cable. Usage: "Boy, stay away from that bob war fence."


TOPICS: Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: dixie; language; south; yall
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To: hummingbird
"Its hotter than a fresh screwed rabbit on a cement pasture"

Tear your ass: Definition..get out of here. go on. git. or head out when used as tear MY ass. Paste tense is Tore your ass.

Usage: "Im fixin to tear my ass down to the beach for the weekend to catch some bull reds, yall wanna go? "

Example 2: Used when mad at someone and tired of their company. "She said she loved that other guy so I told her to tear her ass"

181 posted on 05/18/2004 9:30:45 AM PDT by No Blue States
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To: GSWarrior

But I woke up this mornin with a crick in my neck.


182 posted on 05/18/2004 9:31:25 AM PDT by MagnumRancid
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To: No Blue States

Up the road and down the road were two I heard, too. Not sure it's a Southern thing, though.


183 posted on 05/18/2004 9:31:33 AM PDT by pnz1
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To: OldBlondBabe

Reminds me of one of my favorite jokes...

Southern guy visiting New England, comes upon a lovely coed.

"So, where do you go to school?" says he.

She looks down her nose and snootily replies, "Yale."

He cups his hands to his mouth, "SO, WHERE DO YOU GO TO SCHOOL?"


184 posted on 05/18/2004 9:31:52 AM PDT by The Clemson Tiger (Hold that Tiger!)
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To: Constitution Day; Phantom Lord
My friend Phantom Lord is a Damn Yankee.

Oh, Lordy me, CD...why dint ya'll telme?! I reckon I've posted to him a time or two...well, I sewanny...
185 posted on 05/18/2004 9:33:00 AM PDT by hummingbird ("If it wasn't for the insomnia, I could have gotten some sleep!")
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To: The Clemson Tiger

When I was in Boston someone gave us directions to something "off the main artery".


186 posted on 05/18/2004 9:33:33 AM PDT by pnz1
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To: pnz1
That or an RC Cola?

LOL, every time I hear "ICRC" on the news I always miss what they're saying because it sounds like, "icy RC".

187 posted on 05/18/2004 9:34:36 AM PDT by mtbopfuyn
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To: TheBigB; Constitution Day
Elvin Bishop sittin' on a bale of hay
He ain't good lookin', but he sure can play
188 posted on 05/18/2004 9:35:45 AM PDT by stainlessbanner
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To: hummingbird

Don't worry none. He's good people.


189 posted on 05/18/2004 9:36:38 AM PDT by Constitution Day
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To: TheBigB

Normally it's breakfast, lunch, and supper, but dinner is eaten at noon on Sunday or holidays such as Thanksgiving and Christmas.


190 posted on 05/18/2004 9:37:01 AM PDT by mtbopfuyn
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To: Cooter
Most yankees who move down South are retard...

(Of course, I mean retired)

Not true.

191 posted on 05/18/2004 9:37:42 AM PDT by Phantom Lord (Distributor of Pain, Your Loss Becomes My Gain)
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To: The Clemson Tiger
You just knew this had to devolve into jokes.

Southern boy brought in the wastebasket from the hall and said to the teacher,"I fotched the wastebasket." When the teacher looked at him disapprovingly, he said obligingly, "Looky there! I said fotched when I knew to say brung."

192 posted on 05/18/2004 9:37:44 AM PDT by WVNan (Be faithful in little things, for in them our strength lies. (Mother Teresa))
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To: hummingbird
well, I sewanny

LOL That's a good one, too. My Mom always said, "Well, ah 'swan." Still dunno what it means.

193 posted on 05/18/2004 9:38:36 AM PDT by TheBigB (Jaime Pressly: proof that God does indeed exist.)
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To: Constitution Day
"Well, alrighty then!"
194 posted on 05/18/2004 9:40:00 AM PDT by hummingbird ("If it wasn't for the insomnia, I could have gotten some sleep!")
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To: Judith Anne

Then there's - Show nuf, Ah dun seen it.


195 posted on 05/18/2004 9:40:18 AM PDT by mtbopfuyn
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To: Rebelbase

I thought it was "awl." As in, "Checkyer awl, mister?"


196 posted on 05/18/2004 9:40:27 AM PDT by TheBigB (Jaime Pressly: proof that God does indeed exist.)
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To: OldBlondBabe

bump


197 posted on 05/18/2004 9:40:36 AM PDT by Liberatio (Please forgive my misspelling)
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To: Phantom Lord

I know, but then I couldn't use the play on words.


198 posted on 05/18/2004 9:40:44 AM PDT by Cooter
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To: TheBigB

Most impressive mullet EVER.


199 posted on 05/18/2004 9:42:21 AM PDT by Constitution Day
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To: OldBlondBabe

These aren't authentic. Everybody knows that it's either a "pickup" or a "truck", but never both:-)


200 posted on 05/18/2004 9:42:49 AM PDT by MortMan (Complacency is an enemy sniper)
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