Posted on 05/16/2004 8:44:37 PM PDT by arjay
COMMENTARY
Teen party video raises moral, ethical questions By Mary McCarty
Dayton Daily News
"Did she do the right thing?"
After all the buzz surrounding the infamous Bellbrook videotape — which recorded underage drinking and drug use during a five-day series of parties in November — it boils down to this one question.
Nearly everybody agrees that drinking and drug use are a problem at Bellbrook High School, as they are at nearly every American high school. Nearly everybody agrees that it's not a new problem.
What's different about this case, what has made it the talk of the town for the past five months, is the videotape — and the mother who turned it over to authorities.
She is the center of the storm, drawing fire from some parents whose children have been charged or suspended from school activities. Many praise her as a courageous mother who took a stand and did what was right, despite the personal cost to her family.
Reached at her home Friday, the mother declined to make any public comments.
Two Bellbrook High School seniors pleaded not guilty to the charges last week in Xenia Municipal Court. Jay Thoms, 18, pleaded not guilty to underage possession of alcohol and contributing to the delinquency of a minor. William "Stu" Smythe, 18, pleaded not guilty to misdemeanor charges of underage possession of alcohol, keg law violation, possession of drugs and possession of drug paraphernalia.
Five other teens have been charged in Greene County Juvenile Court. The violations took place Nov. 24 to Nov. 29 at evening parties on Little Sugarcreek Road and in the Bayberry Cove apartment complex off Ohio 725. Sugarcreek Twp. Police Chief Kelly Blair said Friday that the investigation is ongoing and that charges may still be brought against adults who supplied alcohol and marijuana to the students.
Blair wouldn't confirm widespread rumors that the videotape depicted teens involved in sexual activity, but he did say no sexual misconduct charges would be filed.
Blair said the mother turned the videotape over to Bellbrook High School Principal Chuck Birkholtz, who turned it over to Sugarcreek Twp. police.
"That absolutely took guts," Blair said. "It put the parent in a heck of a position."
It's one thing to spout platitudes about "kids being held accountable for their actions." It's another thing to make that call about the baby you brought home from the hospital in that pink or blue knit cap, or the kid who grew up next door. That's what has many Bellbrook parents feeling so torn.
"From the outside looking in, it looks really bad," said Gay Georges, whose daughter, Shelby, is a senior at Bellbrook High School. "But I know so many of those kids who were involved, and they're good kids, polite kids, respectful. They may have done something wrong, but it breaks your heart. I feel very lucky my daughter wasn't there."
Since the story broke, Blair said, parties involving underage drinking appear to be on the wane. "I can only hope this has been an eye-opener for parents," he said. "What the parents don't understand is the liability they assume when they allow students to drink in their home. They could lose everything they have. Regretfully they have the attitude that 'it's only beer.' They want to be a friend and a buddy and not a parent. There's a big difference. When you're a parent you have to make the hard decisions and not be well-liked. It's a bear."
Bellbrook High School student sophomore Aaron Schaffrinna said he has noticed more caution among his peers. "There's a pretty heavy drinking problem here," he said. "This has instilled fear. It's making people think twice."
Schaffrinna said that some students and parents are angry with the school administration for suspending the students involved from sports and extracurricular activities. "At one pep assembly, kids held up signs saying, 'Free So-and-So,' " he said. "It was a big issue. But if the administration hadn't suspended the students it would be telling students that the school is weak and it's OK to break the law."
Like Schaffrinna, junior Jennifer Gigandet is active in the Bellbrook High School chapter of S.A.D.D. (Students Against Destructive Decisions). She, too, supports the administration's decision to suspend students: "It needed to be done because student drinking should be stopped. It's negative in the sense that it gives Bellbrook a bad name, when it's the same as any other school and better than some."
Some longtime Bellbrook residents, such as Pam Brooks, said it was time the police and school officials did something about the problem. "This has been going on in Sugarcreek for a long time," said Brooks, whose sons graduated from the high school in 1991 and 1994. "It's condoned because it's an affluent community. Parents sponsoring the party will tell you, 'I'm taking the keys away so it's perfectly safe.' They need to understand if you serve alcohol to kids, you are breaking the law."
Some parents wish the issue had been handled by the parents rather than the school district. "If my kid got in trouble for something they did outside the school, I'd be upset if the school disciplined them," said former Bellbrook mayor Dave Buccalo, who has a daughter at Bellbrook High School. "I don't think it's up to schools to instill any semblance of moral education or sense of purpose; that's up to the family unit. Maybe people turn to the schools to do what they can't do at home."
Some students feel the same way. "Parents are stepping up and putting the school district in a situation they shouldn't be in," said Shelby Georges, 18. "It's as if they're trying to make the school take the place of the parent."
Shelby and her mother fear that student-athletes have been punished more than others. "If you take everything away from a kid, what do you have?" Mrs. Georges said. "Nothing. I think the students should pay a price, maybe be suspended for a couple of games. Something has to be done, but this punishment really has been going on forever."
The mother who turned in the videotape is the center of the storm.
"Did she do the right thing?"
From the outside looking in, how could any of us know?
What is a keg law violation?
Sounds like a bunch of Democrats. Hate the parent who ruined their party. Forced the parents to actually...parent.
I did a search and found this:
"A civil-rights group and a college professor sued the state Friday over a new requirement that buyers of five or more beer kegs must register their parties and sign a form permitting police onto their property."
I would infer from this that the parties must have had 5 or more kegs of beer and failed to register their parties.
This is happening all over the place. I know first hand that it is. High school teens are having wild parties all over the country on a regular basis and very little is being done about it. It is really sad. Prelude to destruction...
If any of the persons involved in the sexual activity were minors then it would be child porn. But then some say "it's just sex".
"From the outside looking in, it looks really bad," said Gay Georges, whose daughter, Shelby, is a senior at Bellbrook High School. "But I know so many of those kids who were involved, and they're good kids, polite kids, respectful. They may have done something wrong, but it breaks your heart. I feel very lucky my daughter wasn't there."Since the story broke, Blair said, parties involving underage drinking appear to be on the wane. "I can only hope this has been an eye-opener for parents," he said. "What the parents don't understand is the liability they assume when they allow students to drink in their home. They could lose everything they have. Regretfully they have the attitude that 'it's only beer.' They want to be a friend and a buddy and not a parent. There's a big difference. When you're a parent you have to make the hard decisions and not be well-liked. It's a bear."
The disappointment shouldn't be in the teens, who are going to try to do wrong, but in the parents who abused the community trust and aided the teens in doing wrong.
=== I have absolutely no problem saying she did the right thing. Too few parents stand up for that which is right.
Interesting take on a "custody" issue.
I think I would have gone straight to the police with the tape; I'm not sure why she went to the Principal. One thing I would not have done is tell the other parents and expect them to take action.
I think we have went just a 'little' crazy in regards to laws in this country. Do we really need to have 42 different laws that apply to the same crime?
"I don't think it's up to schools to instill any semblance of moral education or sense of purpose; that's up to the family unit. Maybe people turn to the schools to do what they can't do at home."
Out here in San Diego, the addle-brained mothers and fathers who let this happen rationalize the behavior by just claiming that their sons and daughters are "guilty of being 17."
I've seen this used when boys stole beer from convenience stores and when they've been caught drinking or taking drugs at parties.
We will be living through the aftermath and echo of the 60s for a long time still.
She did exactly the right thing. The biggest problem with family units nowadays can be summed up in this sentence..."They want to be a friend and a buddy and not a parent."
Well, they were doing the very same thing (if not more so) decades ago when I was in high school. Somehow the Republic has survived. Let's keep things in perspective around here...
-ccm
The republic may survive, but many of the teens will not.
Innocence once lost can never be regained, and when teens and alcohol are involved, innocence quickly goes down the tubes.
What about the teens who can't handle the booze? What about the girls that get pregnant because they lose their inhibitions from drinking and drugs? What about the ones who leave the party and are killed in a car wreck because they are driving fast and drunk?
I don't care who has done it before or is doing it now, giving booze to teens and having teen booze and drug parties is a dreadful practice that is sure and certain to have destructive effects.
The article seems to me to say that a large number of the parents have simply given up on being responsible parents and teaching their children right and wrong.
Absolutely correct.
When webcams are on every corner, crime will go down.
Whether that is good hard to tell.
I tell my students never do anything you wouldn't want your mother to know about.
Never do anything you wouldn't want your children to do.
So webcams are probably helpful.
Too much foam in your beer.
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