Lowbridge scams the Nigerian 419 Email Scammers

ROTFLOL This is too funny. But think if all the practice Gloria is getting with her English! ;)

PLEASE add me to your ping list. This is the best thread to return to whenever I need a good, long belly laugh.

This is part of the fun. Sending them on wild goose chases to Western Union offices, airports, hotels, other cities, etc. As long as they think you got money for them, they'll go anywhere you tell them.

This is great. I don't know if you've had them do something like this yet - but maybe you can get these scamscum to do this:

Tell them that you can no longer rely on electronic transactions to get the money to to them - and that you are sending the money via a personal associate who is to arrive on Flight ____(Find a flight into the local airport from London or wherever), and tell them that they must find him at the airport by holding up a sign with his name - which will be "Dr. I.M. Amoron".

Also, tell them to take a picture of the person holding the sign at the airport, to prove to you that they made the effort to meet your "associate", in case the contact is not "successful" :^)

Here are a couple of new ones:

FROM Johnson Khumalo(j_ohnsithe@yahoo.ca)
Tel. +27-83-693-2238,
REQUEST FOR ASSISTANCE.
DEAR Sir/Madam,
I known you will surprised to read from me especially from a stranger but please consider this as a request from a family in dire need of assistance. I am JOHNSON KHUMALO the only son of late GENERAL.SOLOMON KHUMALO of ANGOLA.I am presently residing in SOUTH AFRICA.
I got your contact address in the course of a direct search for a reliable person in South Africa Chamber of Commerce and Industry. And i on behalf of my widowed mother MRS. ELIZABETH KHUMALO decided to solicit for your assistance to transfer the sum of US$20.5 Million (TWENTY MILLION FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND UNITED STATES DOLLARS) inherited from my late father into your Personal or Company Account. Before his death, he was a General in charge of Arms and Ammunition procurement for the Angolan Amry. In his "WILL" he ! specifically drew my attention to the sum of US$20.5 Million (TWENTY MILLION FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND UNITED STATES DOLLARS), which he deposited in a Private Security and Finance Company in Johannesburg, South Africa.
INFACT MY FATHER SAID IN HIS "WILL" AND I QUOTE. "MY BELOVED SON" I WISH TO DRAW YOUR ATTENTION TO THE SUM OF US$20.5 MILLION, WHICH I DEPOSITED IN A PRIVATE SECURITY AND FINANCE COMPANY IN JOHANNESBURG, SOUTH AFRICA. DURING THE WAR, I WAS VERY DEDICATED TO AND COMMITED TO WINNING THE WAR AGAINST THE REBELS UNTIL I FOUND OUT MY SENIOR AMRY OFFICERS AND GOVERNMENT FUNCTIONARIES WERE BUSY HELPING THEMSELVES WITH GOVERNMENT FUNDS AND PROPERTIES AND SENDING THEM TO FOREIGN COUNTRIES.
DUE TO THIS WHEN I AND FORMER SPECIAL ADVISER TO THE PRESIDENT WERE ASSIGNED BY THE PRESIDENT (JOSE EDUARDO DU SANTOS) TO PURCHASE ARMS IN SOUTH AFRICA, WHEN NELSON MANDELA THE FORMER PRESIDENT OF SOUTH AFRICA STOPPED SELLING ARMS AND AMMUNITION TO ALL WAR COUNTRIES IN AFRICA. WE SAW THIS AS A GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY AND DIVERTED THE MONEY AND SHARED IT AND GOT THE TOTAL SUM OF US$20.5 MILLION (TWENTY MILLION FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND UNITED STATES DOLLARS). IN CASE OF MY ABSENCE ON EARTH AS A RESULT OF DEATH ONLY, YOU SHOULD SOLICIT FOR ASSISTANCE OF A RELIABLE FOREIGN PARTNER TO ASSIST YOU TO TRANSFER THIS MONEY OUT OF SOUTH AFRICA FOR INVESTMENT PURPOSES.
I DEPOSITED THE MONEY IN YOUR NAME WITH ALL THE DOCUMENTS HANDED TO YOUR MOTHER, TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOUR MOTHER AND YOUR SISTER AND DO NOT COME BACK TO ANGOLA UNTIL THE WAR IS OVER AND BEWARE OF YOUR ENEMIES IN OUR FAMILY KINDRED THAT RELATED TO US IN LIBITO".
From the above, you will understand that the lives and future of our family depends on this fund as such i will be grateful if you will assist us.We are now living in South Africa as Political Asylum Seekers and! the Financial Laws and Regulations of the Republic of South Africa do not allow Asylum Seekers to open Account and hence i am asking you to assist me to transfer this fund out of South Africa to your own personal or Company Account overseas for investment purposes. For your efforts we are prepared to offer you 20% of the total sum, while 5% will be set aside for local and international expenses and the balance i intend to invest in profitable ventures in your country or elsewhere you may advise.
Please, note that this transaction is 100% RISK FREE, for i have made arrangements for a successful transfer as such, the only thing i need from you is Complete trust and Assurance that my own part of the money will be safe when transferred to your Account. Finally, modalities on how the transfer will be done will be conveyed to you once we have established trust and confidence between ourselves. Please, treat asvery urgent.
Thanks and God bless you as we wait for your immediate reply .
Best regards,
Mr. Johnson Khumalo,
(for the family).

From:dare_babs@bigpond.com
Dear sir,

As you read this, I don't want you to feel sorry for
me, because, I believe everyone will die someday.
My name is MR DARE BABS a Crude Oil merchant in KUWAIT,i
have been diagnosed with Esophageal cancer .
It has defiled all forms of medical treatment, and
right now I have only about a few months to live,
according to medical experts.
I have not particularly lived my life so well, as I
never really cared for anyone(not even myself)but my
business. Though I am very rich, I was never
generous, I was always hostile to people and only
focused on my business as that was the only thing I
cared for. But now I regret all this as I now know
that there is more to life than just wanting to have
or make all the money in the world.
I believe when God gives me a second chance to come
to this world I would live my life a different way
from how I have lived it. Now that God has called
me, I have willed and given most of my property
and assets to my immediate and extended family
members as well as a few close friends.
I want God to be merciful to me and accept my soul
so, I have decided to give alms to charity
organizations, as I want this to be one of the last
good deeds I do on earth. So far, I have distributed
money to some charity organizations in Austra, cameroun,
liberia,Algeria and Malaysia. Now that my health has
deteriorated so badly, I cannot do this myself
anymore. I once asked members of my family to close
one of my accounts and distribute the money which I have
there to charity organization in Bulgaria and
Pakistan, they refused and kept the money to
themselves. Hence, I do not trust them anymore, as
they seem not to be contended with what I have left
for them.

The last of my money which no one knows of is the
huge cash deposit of fifteen million dollars
$15,000,000,00 that I have with a finance/Security
Company abroad. I will want you to help me collect this
deposit and dispatched it to charity organizations.

I have set aside 10% for you and for your time.

God be with you.

MR DARE BABS

Here's a new one for you:

12. 09 2004

Dear Brother & Pen friend,

Greetings to you this beautiful Sunday morning. For the purpose of this
subject, I am of the humble opinion that I start by disclosing my identity.
I am Brother Leotis Boateng. I was born 48 years ago in Moyamba, Southern
province of Sierra Leone. I am the founder and spiritual leader of Greater
Harvest Bible church Moyamba. My evangelical profession earned me the title
of Brotherhood of St Christopher of the Anglican Communion. I speak krio
and English language. Today, I and my family of six are domicile at the
Ecomog camp situated at Kilometer11 Oru , Ijebu Ode, west of Nigeria.
This is as a result of the civil strife that engulfed my country Sierra
Leone for over a decade.

Having unveiled my person, I will like to solicit your advice and assistance
in a matter of high relevance to my future, my family and my people. Precisely
ten years ago in 1994, when the war in my country escalated, my church was
converted to a hospital. Two wounded British army peacekeepers left a metal
crate containing diamonds in my custody but they never returned from the
warfront, as it was obvious they died in the battle to reclaim the mineral
rich fields of Eastern province from the Revolutionary United Front rebel
occupation. During our evacuation to refugee camps outside our country
I took the crate should in case the British soldiers turned up as all refugees
were numbered for easy identification but up till this moment my initial
belief have been confirmed that they died in the war that claimed more victims
than reported by the press.

As a result of my puritanical posture, I strongly believe that people who
don?t know God struggle for everything in life. I am also aware that God
has a role for every person alive. Our destiny. Sincerely speaking, I do
not know about diamond trade and I will not like to hand over this diamonds
to the authorities in my country, whom I know will confiscate the diamonds
with the proceeds ending up in their pockets. Rather, I intend to sell this
diamonds and use the proceeds to develop abundant human resources wasting
away in the refugee camps. With your assistance I would like to embark on
a sustainable agricultural development project that will provide employment
and ensure self-sufficiency of food. Food is exactly what Africans need
right now. Food in abundance and not white elephant technological projects.
In the past three years I have considered and rejected several methods to
dispose the diamonds. Through constant prayer, I am guided to reason that
only a foreign person who will not capitalize on my present condition can
be trusted to sell the diamonds and also assist to implement a viable agricultural
investment with proper technical assistance. Yesterday, I went to the postal
agency with Internet office at ijebu ode and told the operator I needed
contact of a foreign pen pal and friend to help me propagate the activities
of my church that was disrupted by the war in my country. This is why I
contacted you. I do realize this might sound unusual but it is the whole
fact and nothing but the fact.

If you agree to assist me in this endeavor, I will prove the effectiveness
of this offer by sending you a few specimen of the diamonds via DHL worldwide
courier, to enable you determine their actual value and find a buyer for
the entire consignment weighing 46.5kg. I am willing to assume the cost
of shipping the samples so as to welcome your interest in this matter and
further this relationship.

I look forward to your early response to my private email address: boateng5566@christianmail.org

for further explanation.

May the good Lord guide your decision

Brother Boateng Leotis
boateng5566@christianmail.org

bookmarking!!

Like the site (the second one) and thought this would appeal to you:

http://www.the-whiteboard.com/

He usually does 3 installments a week. This one happens to be from 12/1/04

OMG...I read the one with Gloria Giam and it was HILLARIOUS! Great job!!

I have been laughing so hard I am almost crying. Your letters are hilarious. A bookmark for this thread and your site!

Please don't do anything to piss them off before they wire the 25 million to my account