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 U.S. ARMY SIGNAL CORPS |
| Gen. Douglas MacArthur: Victory and the appearance of victory were his top goals. |
Posted on 05/12/2004 1:25:57 AM PDT by sarcasm
Karen Kain, Canadian prima ballerina, confessed in her autobiography that out of some 10,000 performances during her career, there were only seven or eight with which she was truly satisfied.
Gen. Douglas MacArthur, the American commander during World War II, loathed admitting defeat and once uttered during battle, "We are not retreating — we are advancing in another direction."
Martha Stewart, the notoriously demanding lifestyle maven-cum-felon, once threatened to dump her Merrill Lynch stockbroker because she didn't like the firm's telephone hold music.
Kain. MacArthur. Stewart. Perfectionists all.
Perfectionism is the need to be — or to appear — perfect. Perfectionists are persistent, detailed and organized high achievers. Perfectionists vary in their behaviors: Some strive to conceal their imperfections; others attempt to project an image of perfection. But all perfectionists have in common extremely high standards for themselves or for others.
Researchers are split on whether perfectionism has only negative aspects; some argue it could be a virtue that propels people to excellence. Yet convincing data link certain forms of perfectionism to a host of emotional, physical and relationship problems, including propensity to depression, eating disorders, marital discord and even suicide.
According to the prevailing definition, perfectionists are people who not only hold unrealistically high standards but also judge themselves or others as always falling short.
"The thing about perfectionists is that they don't ever experience satisfaction," said Paul Hewitt, professor of psychology at the University of British Columbia and one of the leading researchers on perfectionism. "Nothing is ever good enough."
Hewitt had a patient who was a classic case: A graduate student set out to earn an A-plus in a particular course, only to become distressed and morose when he succeeded.
"He said that if he was really, truly smart, he wouldn't have had to study so hard," Hewitt recalled.
Perfectionism's many faces
Hewitt and his co-researchers have identified three types of perfectionists. Self-oriented perfectionists expect perfection of themselves. Other-oriented perfectionists demand perfection from other people. And socially prescribed perfectionists think others expect perfection from them.
Hewitt helped to develop a 45-question test, called the Multidimensional Perfectionism Scale, to measure the three different facets. He contends that all three types of perfectionism are maladaptive — that is, nothing about them is beneficial.
Some studies have shown that self-oriented perfectionists, such as the ballerina Kain, score higher on exams and get better grades than nonperfectionists, even when adjusted for IQ levels. But Hewitt says such accomplishments come with a price. For instance, all three types of perfectionists tend to experience greater personal dissatisfaction despite their accomplishments. The correlation between self-oriented perfectionism and another potential consequence, depression, is inconclusive. However, Hewitt maintains that perfectionistic tendencies create a vulnerability that could push a person into depression if something were to trigger it.
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In 1993, a group of Israeli researchers published the results of psychological autopsies on 43 suicides by male soldiers during compulsory military service. The victims were all between 18 and 21 years old.
Examination of their military records and interviews with those who knew them implicated intense perfectionism as a key trigger for 28 percent of the soldiers. These suicides stemmed in part from the victims' perception of "humiliation or insult or a failure to live up to his own or others' expectations" during their service. The study appeared in the Archives of General Psychiatry.
Other-oriented perfectionism, a form Martha Stewart is said to exhibit, can involve exceedingly high expectations by parents of their children or extreme criticism of a spouse or significant other. This type is associated with low marital happiness — particularly on the part of the besieged partner — and other relationship difficulties.
Spotting perfectionists
In addition to identifying the three types of perfectionists, Hewitt and his co-researchers say perfectionists reveal themselves in three distinct ways
The first, a "self-promotion" style, involves attempts to impress others by bragging or displaying one's perfection. Self-promoters care deeply about appearing in control, about displaying perfect social graces and are meticulous about their looks. Politicians and most of the cast of television's "The Apprentice" could fit this mold.
This type is easy to spot because "they irritate people," said Gordon Flett, professor of psychology at York University in Toronto and Hewitt's long-time collaborator.
Self promoters are more prone to eating disorders such as anorexia. Flett said he and his colleagues are planning a simple, but novel, experiment to test for this trait: asking female subjects to be photographed without makeup.
"We predict that they're going to be very anxious. Especially if we tell them the photos will be evaluated," Flett said.
A second way that perfectionists reveal themselves is by shunning situations that could display their imperfection. They avoid making mistakes in public and hate letting people know about their failures. For example, they likely will turn down a golf invitation from the boss if they play poorly.
Flett said such tendencies are obvious even in young children.
"Teachers know that perfectionistic kids only try things they're good at," he said.
Perfectionists who practice such avoidance tend to form few relationships.
The third type of presentation is a person who keeps problems to himself, won't admit failure to others and conceals how hard he works on things. Gen. MacArthur's inability to concede defeat is one example. Another is the spouse who might have had a screw-up on the job but, when asked about his day at work, replies, "it was fine."
This person may have more relationships than those who evade situations but not deeply intimate relationships.
Origins of perfectionism
Perfectionism is not officially recognized as a psychiatric disorder in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual, the reference most commonly used in the United States for diagnosing mental disorders.
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A 1994 experiment with 30 preschoolers at a computer camp in Toronto showed that even 4- and 5-year-olds possess marked traits for perfectionism. Interviewers asked the children five questions tapping perfectionism levels ("How would you like to be perfect?"). Then they gave the kids a computer task that was rigged to not work. The highly perfectionistic children showed signs of more extreme distress, such as elevated anger and anxiety, Flett said.
Hewitt said preliminary research indicates a possible genetic factor to perfectionism. Children of perfectionists tend to grow up to be perfectionists themselves, although Hewitt said much more study is needed to confirm this.
Hewitt is emphatic that perfectionism is never a good thing. He disagrees with an emerging view from other researchers that perfectionism may lead to positive results, such as higher self esteem or better grades.
But others disagree: "Is relentless pursuit of perfection bad? How about making a really, really good car?" said Ken Rice, an associate professor of psychology at the University of Florida. "I don't see anything really wrong with people trying to be at the top of their game."
Rice agrees with Edward Chang of the University of Michigan, who argues that research by Hewitt and others have unfairly given perfectionism a bad name.
Chang, a Korean-American associate professor of psychology, says cultural differences about perfectionism and striving have especially been overlooked. For instance, Asian Americans show greater levels of perfectionism than whites, Chang said. Yet Asian Americans are no more prone to considering suicide, which, Chang said, demonstrates that perfectionism is not as maladaptive for them.
"For some people, perfectionism will represent something bad and pathological. For other people, perfectionism will represent something good and inspiring, said Chang, who is writing a book called, "Positive and Negative Perfectionism."
Hewitt dismisses such views as differences over semantics.
The so-called healthy perfectionists, in fact, are something else, Hewitt says.
And if you ask me, a wide survey of over and under achievers would show two things. The over-achievers would never want to be like the under-achievers, and the under-achievers would want to be like the over-achievers (or at least have the rewards inherent in over-achieving, but maybe without the work).
If you had ever been married to a perfectionist, you would not have this opinion. The author hit the nail on the head.
Oh yeah? Do you want a Doctor who gets the answer right 85% of the time? A surgical crew who counts their tools at the end of a case and is mostly certain that none of them are missing (Being that the couple they can't find are still in you). Do you want to fly on a plane designed by an engineer who figured the stresses on the airframe and was almost right?
I don't care if you call it OC, or perfectionism, or something else, our society demands that some trades are 100% right 100% of the time.
There is a difference between being very competent and being a perfectionist. A perfectionist may try to be perfect, but even in their own minds, they know they aren't. The problem is, a perfectionist will never admit they made a mistake. When something goes badly, it is always something outside their control or someone else's fault.
I was married to a perectionist for almost 28 years, and it wasn't much fun.
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