 pukes.wav (122K) Save to Online Drive
Drill Instructor: You are pukes. You are the lowest form of life on Earth. You are not even human fucking beings. You are nothing more than unorganized grabastic pieces of amphibian shit.
scumbag.wav (19K) Save to Online Drive
Drill Instructor: What's your name, Scumbag?
neck.wav (56K) Save to Online Drive
Drill Instructor: You had best unfuck yourself or I will unscrew your head and shit down your neck!
cowboy.wav (465K) Save to Online Drive
Drill Instructor: How tall are you private?
Cowboy: Sir! Five foot nine, sir!
Drill Instructor: Five foot nine? I didn't know they stacked shit that high! You tryin' to squeeze an inch in on me somewhere, huh?
Cowboy: Sir! No Sir!
Drill Instructor: Bullshit. It looks to me like the best part of you ran down the crack of your momma's ass and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress! I think you been cheated! Where in the hell are you from anyway, private?
Cowboy: Sir! Texas, Sir!
Drill Instructor: Holy dog shit! Texas? Only steers and queers come from Texas, Private Cowboy. And you don't look much like a steer to me so that kinda narrows it down. Do you suck dicks?
Cowboy: Sir! No Sir!
Drill Instructor: Are you a peter puffer?
Cowboy: Sir! No Sir!
Drill Instructor: I'll bet you're the kinda guy that would fuck a person in the ass and not even have the goddamn common courtesy to give him a reach-around. I'll be watching you.
sister.wav (38K) Save to Online Drive
Drill Instructor: Hell, I like you. You can come over to my house and fuck my sister.
faithful.wav (345K) Save to Online Drive
Drill Instructor: Tonight, you pukes will sleep with your rifles. You will give your rifle a girl's name, because this is the only pussy you people are going to get. Your days of finger-banging ol' Mary Jane Rottencrotch through her pretty pink panties are over! You're married to this piece. This weapon of iron and wood. And you will be faithful!
myrifle.wav (118K) Save to Online Drive
Drill Instructor: (in cadence) This is my rifle, this is my gun.
Recruits: This is for fighting, this is for fun.
Drill Instructor: This is my rifle, this is my gun.
Recruits: This is for fighting, this is for fun
hardon.wav (88K) Save to Online Drive
Drill Instructor: God has a hard-on for Marines. Because we kill everything we see.
here_b4.wav (204K) Save to Online Drive
Drill Instructor: God was here before the Marine Corps. So you can give your heart to Jesus, but your ass belongs to The Corps. Do you ladies understand?
Recruits: Sir! Yes sir!
Drill Instructor: I can't hear you!
Recruits: Sir! Yes sir!
giveme25.wav (39K) Save to Online Drive
Drill Instructor: You slimey scumbag, get on your face and give me 25!
supistry.wav (348K) Save to Online Drive
Drill Instructor: Anybody know who Lee Harvey Oswald was? Private Snowball?
Snowball: Sir, he shot Kennedy, sir!
Drill Instructor: That's right. And do you know how far away he was?
Snowball: Sir, he was pretty far. From that Book Suppository Building, sir!
(laughter)
Drill Instructor: Alright, knock it off.
forever.wav (174K) Save to Online Drive
Drill Instructor: And always remember this... Marines die. That's what we're here for. But The Marine Corps lives forever. And that means you live forever.
numnuts.wav (39K) Save to Online Drive
Drill Instructor: What is your major malfunction, Numbnuts?
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