Official Freeper "apology" thread: Let's tell 'em what we're "sorry" for

AP Rumsfeld Apology Story ^ | 5/7/04

[Wolfstar]

Aides: Rumsfeld to Apologize to Congress"
By DAVID ESPO, AP Special Correspondent

WASHINGTON - Amid calls for his resignation, Defense Secretary Donald H. Rumsfeld drafted an apology Friday for not keeping Congress informed about abuses of Iraqi prisoners in U.S. custody, defense officials said.
[CLICK ABOVE LINK TO READ ENTIRE AP STORY]

FReepers, since apologizing seems to be the order of the day, let's show 'em how we "apologize!" Let me begin with my own profuse apologies to the entire nation:

I'm sorry we ever had a president who's version of the truth was to say, "It depends on what the meaning of the word IS, is."

As a Californian, I sorry for this pathetic bunch of Dems in my state's congressional delegation: Baca; Becerra; Berman; Boxer; Capps; Cardoza; Davis; Dooley; Eshoo; Farr; Feinstein; Filner; Harman; Honda; Lantos; Lee; Lofgren; Matsui; Millender-McDonald; Miller, George; Napolitano; Pelosi; Roybal-Allard; Sanchez, Linda; Sanchez, Loretta; Schiff; Sherman; Solis; Stark; Tauscher; Thompson; Waters; Watson; Waxman; Woolsey.

I'm so sorry people like Barbara Streisand, Michael Moore, Jane Fonda and any other members of the Hollyweird limousine-liberal crowd breath air.

I'm deeply sorry that the voters of Massachusettes keep sending Ted "The Swimmer" Kennedy to the U.S. Senate.

[OldFriend]

And Marxine's gal actually thanked me for understanding......

I am sorry I felt so mean about that call......NOT REALLY SORRY>

[JonH]

You forgot the governor...

[FITZ]

Should we apologize to the Germans now since I don't think we were as inclined to apologize back when we hurt their feelings and humiliated them? After all the Nazis had them thinking they were the master race and we defeated them --- that had to be humiliating.

[verity]

I am sorry we have such sanctimonious dumb-asses in Congress!

[Wolfstar]

I am sorry I felt so mean about that call...

Hehehehehehe...next time you call, you might ask about this bit of bigotry: The Sacramento Dems decided that too many Hispanics moved into Maxine's old district. To protect her, they redrew the district lines to follow the Afro-Americans who had moved south and west to get away from the Hispanics.

I wound up being on the extreme southern border of Maxine's newly redrawn district for just under two years until I moved this March. Now I'm in Jane Harman's district (sorry about that). I'm so sorry it's hard to get away from Dems in Southern California.

[Not A Snowbird]

I am sorry I chose this thread to vent on.

That's the spirit!

[Wolfstar]

Didn't Bill Clinton apologize to the Germans on one of his trips? Or is that one of the very few counries in which he failed to apologize for the United States?! If it is, I'm so sorry for Bill "The Jazzman" Clinton.

[RetiredArmy]

I am sorry that I refuse to be sorry about anything. There, I finally said I was sorry.

Never apologize, it is a sign of weakness. John Wayne.

[gipper81]

I am sorry that our publik skool system in this country produces so many irrational leftists. I am truly sorry.

[LexBaird]

It comes in cans these days.

[ovrtaxt]

From Monty Python:

SUPERIMPOSED CAPTION: 'POLITICIANS - AN APOLOGY'

The camera pans across a landscape. Roller caption starts to come up, superimposed. The words are quite large and easily readable, but well spaced so that the roller will seem to go on for quite some time. Voice over reads.

Voice Over

(and CAPTION:) 'WE WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE FOR THE WAY IN WHICH POLITICIANS ARE REPRESENTED IN THIS PROGRAMME. IT WAS NEVER OUR INTENTION TO IMPLY THAT POLITICIANS ARE WEAK-KNEED, POLITICAL TIME-SERVERS WHO ARE CONCERNED MORE WITH THEIR PERSONAL VENDETTAS AND PRIVATE POWER STRUGGLES THAN THE PROBLEMS OF GOVERNMENT, NOR TO SUGGEST AT ANY POINT THAT THEY SACRIFICE THEIR CREDIBILITY BY DENYING FREE DEBATE ON VITAL MATTERS IN THE MISTAKEN IMPRESSION THAT PARTY UNITY COMES BEFORE THE WELL-BEING OF THE PEOPLE THEY SUPPOSEDLY REPRESENT NOR TO IMPLY AT ANY STAGE THAT THEY ARE SQUABBLING LITTLE TOADIES WITHOUT AN OUNCE OF CONCERN FOR THE VITAL SOCIAL PROBLEMS OF TODAY. NOR INDEED DO WE INTEND THAT VIEWERS SHOULD CONSIDER THEM AS CRABBY ULCEROUS LITTLE SELF-SEEKING VERMIN WITH FURRY LEGS AND AN EXCESSIVE ADDICTION TO ALCOHOL AND CERTAIN EXPLICIT SEXUAL PRACTICES WHICH SOME PEOPLE MIGHT FIND OFFENSIVE. WE ARE SORRY IF THIS IMPRESSION HAS COME ACROSS.

[katz]

Hey, you've said it better than I.

(I've been sweating to hardwood floor cleaning and aft)
Plan to check in on the FR's every hour.

[Hillarys Gate Cult]

I'm sorry that our communists/Marxists/Maoists are ashamed of those names and instead call themselves liberals, progressives, and Democrats.

[ovrtaxt]

I apologize...

[ovrtaxt]

another apology...

[ovrtaxt]

more stuff to apologize for...

[FITZ]

I don't know --- being that they are the unpolitically correct skin color for Bill Clinton, I would doubt it --- and did Bill Clinton ever apologize to the Serbs? That is one apology I could whole-heartedly support.

[LibKill]

The only thing I'm sorry for is that I'm too old to hunt down Osama and bring back his freaking head IN A BUCKET!

[Wolfstar]

...CRABBY ULCEROUS LITTLE SELF-SEEKING VERMIN WITH FURRY LEGS AND AN EXCESSIVE ADDICTION TO ALCOHOL AND CERTAIN EXPLICIT SEXUAL PRACTICES WHICH SOME PEOPLE MIGHT FIND OFFENSIVE...

Ah, now I understand why at least some of those congress-critters were so cranky with Rumsfeld. They are sorry, too. Sorry their little S&M fantasies were acted out by someone else and they weren't invited. I'm sure "Sheets" Byrd especially loved the collar-and-leash thing, and Barny Frank's idea of heaven would have been to be in the middle of that pyramid.

I know. I know. Vulgar; too vulgar. I'm so sorry.

[neutrino]

I'm sorry - deeply, truly remorseful - that we haven't reduced Mecca and Medina to radioactive slag heaps.