So this lawyer walks into a classroom . . .

The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette ^ | Tuesday, April 20, 2004 | Gretchen McKay

[Willie Green]

Program aims to keep school jokes from going nasty

Anyone who's ever attended elementary school knows that children love to tell jokes. Knock-knock jokes, in particular, are a favorite among the 11-and-under crowd, along with those that make a silly play on words.

Q: Why did SpongeBob put a clock on the stove?
A: He wanted to see time fry.

At a certain age, though, innocent joke-telling has a way of developing into making fun of others. A funny haircut, a few extra pounds on the belly, an unusual accent or unfamiliar religious beliefs -- it's all fodder for the grade-school joke machine.

Yet teach them early, in an entertaining way, the difference between funny jokes and painful teasing, and you might help prevent some bad childhood memories.

[Willie Green]

Would you want a lawyer teaching your child what is funny and what isn't?

[AfghanIraqVeteran]

BOOOHHHHOOOOOO!

[baltodog]

Well, O-Tay!!!

[headsonpikes]

Would you want a lawyer teaching your child...?

Threaten the lawyers with imported talent and off-shoring, I say.

;^)

[Agnes Heep]

I've got news for this pedant: the bullies aren't going to give up bullying. But feel-good, time-wasting crap such as he's promoting will succeed in keeping the bullied from fighting back.

[malakhi]

Yet teach them early, in an entertaining way, the difference between funny jokes and painful teasing, and you might help prevent some bad childhood memories.

This sounds like a job for Sexual Harassment Panda.

[martin_fierro]

A Bankruptcy Trustee and a Special Master walk into a bar...

[xsmommy]

willie....ahem...i think marteen and i are pretty dang funny.....as is mountaineer....

[7thson]

Another absurdity! Then, when these kids can't pass a SAT or can't read, write, and do math, they will scratch their collective heads and wonder why. Is it close to start putting muzzles on everyone at the age of two so that nobody gets their feelings hurt?

[stainlessbanner]

"This was a $60 tie," he told the 300 or so kindergartners through second-graders who had assembled in the auditorium, as Matthew giggled and snipped away at the gold material. "Do you know how much it's worth now?"

Holding up the shorn piece of material a few minutes later, he quipped: "$30," and the crowd dissolved in giggles.

They should really leave the jokes to the children.

[Willie Green]

willie....ahem...i think marteen and i are pretty dang funny.....as is mountaineer....

Well yeah... I always enjoyed watchin' the 3 of yinz on Paul Shannon 'nat...
But Mom thought yinz were a bad influence...
she was worried we kids might poke each others' eyes out 'nat.

[Doug Loss]

What he really meant was, "It's worth $1,000,000 after I get done convincing a jury that the cut tie and the subsequent ridicule from other professionals caused me severe mental anguish..."

[xsmommy]

why i oughta......

[Cicero]

Anybody want to hear a blond joke?

[joesnuffy]

A ten year old walks up to his pretty classmate at lunch and offers her a Hostess treat..
He says : " Wanna Ho....Ho?"
The 'boyze'... laugh..... the little girl cries.....the boy gets attention/detention
and now its a popular gag
Happend in my sister-in-laws elementary school cafeteria recently...

[jcb8199]

BOO HOO! Let's Communize our educational system a little MORE! What's next, you can't cast a disapproving eye at the freak in the black eyeliner, or wear designer clothing, all because it makes others "feel bad"?

BOOOOO HOOOO!!!!!

[baltodog]

What do you call a student who can't get a decent score on his/her SAT's?


Stupid!!!!

[wbill]

True story....was a show with my Dad. Booth at the show was "xxxx, xxxx, and xxxx: Attorneys at Law" (the names have been changed to protect the innocent). :-)

Anyway, they had a sign up that said "Free legal advice! Ask us any question." Dad walked up to them and asked if they knew the difference between a tragedy and a damn shame.

Lawyers are very humor impaired.

And btw, a tragedy is when a busload of lawyers goes over a cliff and a damn shame is when 2 seats are empty.... :-)

[cynicom]

"volunteer attorneys"

Has anyone ever met such a thing????

[TexasCajun]

What do you get when you have a room full of Lesbians and Politicians?