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What a cutie! I like the work-for-dates idea, too.

We're thinking of a "date the family" system: You like our daughter? Great! Come to church with us, and then come home and have dinner, play ball with the brothers, tell mom and dad about your career plans, offer to wash dishes or read a story to the babies. If that works out, maybe you'll get an invitation to camp or hunt ... let's see if you impress Grandad. When were you planning to do your military service? Good idea ... we'll all look forward to reading your letters from Iraq. Elen loves jewelry, so keep your eye out for bargains while you're overseas ...

Our oldest daughter is 13, so it won't be long before we have to do *something* with boys. She currently says she plans to be an old maid with cats, so maybe we'll just have to say, "Sorry, Josie's not interested, please don't call again!"

That was exactly what I did with my wife, although it's called "courtship". Long distance does make it tough, but it works wonders. After six years of marriage I'm around her family more than my own, so you better get to know the in-laws pretty well so that you're liked and accepted. And is a very good impetus to not engage in marital activity - trust me!

Dating has only been around for about 100 years, and is (obviously) a complete failure. Dating was actually started by the lower classes, because they did not have parlors or places within a home/apartment for the couple to have some privacy. Working well, isn't it? People start to engage in sexual activity, and they either don't know who they're marrying because they're blinded by the sex, or the relationship does not end in marriage, and both parties add emotional baggage to carry to their next relationship.

I think that's why people are waiting longer to get married: the guys are getting it for "free", so why take on the additional burdens of marriage and family. The women keep hoping that marriage will happen, but get put off; when this happens in their early 20s, they are much less willing to commit in later relationships because of being burned. What a price to pay for sexual "freedom".

This is actually how my fiance and I developed our relationship, especially the first year or so...we'd spend time together with our families. We'd help my brother work on his bicycle, or we'd help his mom with her gardening, things like that. The other was always invited for family gatherings or even just Sunday dinner at home. As a result, there was no "getting to know the inlaws" period...his family already knows me very well, and vice versa.

This just sort of came naturally to us. With the right kind of boy dating a girl, it is still quite possible to do things this way. We were 19 and 20 when we started dating, but it would work nicely with the older teen who is still living at home.