Posted on 03/21/2004 11:46:20 AM PST by RightOnline
Harrumph. Look, if God wanted man to fly, He would have given him rotors.
d.o.l.
Criminal Number 18F
Then I guess this applies too:
* The Rotor is just a big fan on top of the a/c to keep the pilot cool. Want proof? Make it stop; then watch the pilot break out into a sweat.
Come again? You were an "airplane driver?
Since I only operate motor vehicles, I guess that makes me a "car pilot".
Center: "Three-niner-quebec, ident."
Me: "Roger, Center." while I'm hitting the ident button.
Center: "Thanks, Three-niner-quebec, just wanted to make sure you weren't the Goodyear blimp. Your groundspeed readout is 35 knots."
We didn't make it to our destination that day.
It was especially fun, on really windy days, to lift off into a fierce headwind, then let it blow us backwards to touch down on the runway behind where we'd taken off.
The tower guys loved it too, especially when there were others waiting in the queue to go.
They were so busy with that imaginary crap that they didn't have the time to notice the real problem. So, after we finally take off, and make it to our (intermediate) destination, the pilot announces that we'll be landing in a few minutes and we're going to go into final approach.
He then banked, fairly hard, and spent the next half hour or so flying in a circle. WTF??? Not a word from the cockpit during this time.
A while later, he comes on the PA and announces that there's a bit of a problem. The right wing's slat is stuck. He then says they think they've got it taken care of, and he hopes we'll be landing soon.
The "hopes" pertained to the word "landing", not the word "soon".
So, he comes in to the runway -- at flying speed. We must have been doing 300MPH+ when the wheels touched the pavement. He immediately threw on the reverse thrusters and maxed them out. The plane did not seem to be slowing down. I looked out the window and stuff was flying past us at an incredible rate of speed. I'd never traveled that fast on the ground before (and never want to again).
The plane gradually slowed down, but it took the entire length of the runway, with the reverse thrusters screaming the whole time.
At the end of the runway, he made a sharp left, and we saw two rows of firetrucks sitting there with their lights flashing. Smilin' Jack gets back on the PA and tells us not to pay any attention to the firetrucks, he told them that we didn't need them, but they wanted to have a drill anyway.
Yeah, right.
What happened, as best as I can figure out, is that the "taken care of" he mentioned before descending wasn't that they'd freed up the right slat, but instead, they seem to have come in with both slats retracted, and I think no-flaps too -- after spending forever and a half flying in a circle to burn off excess fuel, "just in case."
They didn't let anyone get out to kiss the ground, either. They held us hostage on the plane, not telling us a damn thing, and then, after about 45 minutes or so, announced that anyone who wanted to go try to rent a car to drive the rest of their way to their destinations had permission to do so, but be advised that the car rental counters had closed about five minutes ago (by now it was late at night, and to put it into perspective, it was late afternoon, broad daylight when we were supposed to land).
Some time around one in the morning, they announced that the slat had been repaired and that we'd be taking off for the final leg of the destination. It was white-knuckle city for the rest of that flight -- especially the landing. My wife's fingernails are still embedded in my hand (that's the only exaggeration in this story).
I always hated flying Republic -- they had the nastiest, most arrogant, rude employees I'd ever seen. That is, until Northwest took 'em over.
I can think of exactly one NW employee I've encountered that wasn't a complete and utter [insert_epithet_of_choice] -- and that was a stew who seemed to have it in for the gate-b!tc# who'd tried her damndest to screw me over out of sheer spite (during another work slowdown!) She tried to force me -- at the boarding gate! to put a bag full of collectible cameras -- unpadded, unlocked, soft-side case jam-packed with them -- she tried to force me to put it into the luggage compartment "because there's no room for it". This was total BS. She only "discovered" that there was "no room" when she discovered that it was full of valuable delicate photographic equipment that was in now way packed for handling by the baggage apes.
I got nowhere with this piece of work in heels, and resolved myself to losing my cameras, or, having them destroyed. She ordered me to walk it down to the door (of the plane) and leave it there for baggage to pick up. I was furious, but there wasn't a damn thing I could do, except get myself tossed off the plane, and/or arrested if I made a stink about it. And, the btch knew it. Like I said, it was pure spite, during a "work slowdown".
Anyway, I get to the plane, and the stew wants to know why the cameras should go into the hold, because there's plenty of room on the HALF-EMPTY airplane (a huge wide-body job on a short hop).
Just then, the gate-btch starts yapping at her -- turns out she'd followed me all the way down to the plane, to make sure I obeyed her! UFB-city! Sheesh!
The stew smiles at her, and then looks at me and says "there's plenty of room, no problem, take it with you."
The gate-btch goes berserk, and starts foaming at the mouth, barking at the stew about how she f'n ordered me to put it in baggage. The stew keeps her cool, keeps smiling, and tells the gate/b that there's no problem, and leaves her sputtering outside the door.
I got the impression it wasn't the first encounter they'd had -- and I wouldn't be surprised if the stew would have treated me quite a bit differently if not for whatever was going on in that particular situation. That may sound cynical, but hey, from everything I've experienced with that airline, treating the customers like $#!+ seems to be an ingrained part of the corporate culture. (These are far from the only horror stories I have personally experienced with those SOBs.)
Now, the icing on the cake -- this was in the pre-9/11 environment. NWIH will I get on any airline in the present madness, and NWIH will I ever fly Northwest again, period. I'd rather travel cross-country on bloody stumps via pogo stick than put my blood pressure in those bastards' hands again.
The most infuriating aspect to it all is the realization that no matter how many customers they drive away -- no matter how many people choose to drive -- or to stay home -- rather than fly NW -- they will never go bankrupt, because the gov't will take my taxes and use it to bail them out, should it come to that.
For better or worse (i.e., "worse"), we've essentially got socialized air transport in this country. The airlines are not subject to market realities; they are immune to things that would put any other business out of business -- and they know it.
Fortunately (so to speak), my health has deteriorated to the point that I can't travel anyway, so it's moot for me, except for the fond memories (/sarcasm) and the realization that no matter how bad the airlines make it for themselves, I'll still be there to have my wallet squeezed by the IRS to help keep them flying.
/end_rant! :)
The A&Ps that stopped to read them always had two or three repair orders kicked back in the following few days for lunacy!
Once,
the guys were replacing a forward(?) trunnion on a 727 freighter after a heavy D exposed a crack.
Reams of engineering data was compiled, 11 A&P's were assigned, 2 QC, 3 leadmen, 1 manager, 2 Boeing reps, an on-call in-house machinist on stand-by, an R&R returnable trunnion repair kit costing upteeth kathousands of dollars was brought in from Boeing, something like 10 days pass and when it's all buttoned up the repair order came back - - "Trunnion Fixed".
Page was a fun place to work!
<|:-)~~
hehe ! Thanks.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.