John F'n Kerry: The Rage of Paris, But Sour at Home

The Washington Times ^ | March 19, 2003 | Wesley Pruden

[quidnunc]

Queen Latifah may or may not be the only "foreign leader" to actually endorse John Kerry, but it's clear that the Democratic campaign so far is working better abroad than it is at home.

Monsieur Kerry, the rage of Paris, the toast of Berlin, sprouting in Brussels and boffo in Brittany, continues to insist that a lot of world leaders have endorsed him, but only privately. He told one citizen with an inquiring mind the other day in Pennsylvania that it was none of his business who those world leaders are. Officials of the governments of France, Germany, Russia, Canada and Mexico have said they're as puzzled as the rest of us about who these mystery leaders might be. No word yet from Lower Volta, Upper Slobbovia or Grand Marnier. Late-night comic David Letterman says Queen Latifah, the bountifully busty big-booted movie star, is the only Kerry-mad world leader he can find, but Her Royal Highness, actually as American as Chicago, is said to be vacationing in Tahiti and could not be reached to say whether she gets the joke.

Nevertheless, it's true that Monsieur Kerry is a man for all European seasons. The French, as you might expect, are gaga and it's not even April. His haughty Gallic face is spread across newspapers and newsmagazines, and radio and television talk shows can't get enough Kerry talk.

"People are going crazy," the chairwoman of Democrats Abroad tells the New York Sun. "My phone is ringing from morning to night because everybody wants to know about Kerry. I'm even getting calls from French people asking if they can contribute to the campaign."

The French generally think about as much of the Americans as the Americans think of the French, which is usually not very much, and these early spasms of delight are not about America, but about Monsieur Kerry, whom our French friends regard as more French than American. (Can 60 million Frenchmen be wrong?) He was educated, after all, at a boarding school in Switzerland, where he learned to speak fluent nuance, and this skill naturally endears him to the average French official who has been taught to say "I surrender" in several languages. He spent his boyhood summers with French cousins in Brittany, and can order snails or chitlins (which the French call tripes a la mode de Caen) in several dialects. He can sneer at "the Anglo-Saxons" at war in Iraq with the fluent elegance of Jacques Chirac. When he vows to restore the glory of France all Europe cheers.

-snip-

[JohnBDay]

The French dream: Kerry/Lewis 2004

[Utah Girl]

I was on a literature list-serv where there were several foreigners. The Brits seemed to think they had a say in US elections because US politics swayed the world so much, and European politics especially. One Brit seemed to cause the nastiest flame wars I've ever seen. I no longer belong to the list.

[binger]

[NaughtiusMaximus]

Any French people wishing to contribute can send cash or international postal money orders to my address below . . .

[mcg1969]

Damnit, if I wanted my leaders to be more European, I'd move there.

[texasflower]

He doesn't look like a Texan

I am very proud to be hated by Europeans for not only being American, but for being a Texan as well.

It's double the honor!

[sharkdiver]

Anyone notice how J. F-ing Kerry is traveling around the country for almost the last year has missed 68 of 70 votes since the first of the year and continues to gleefully accept that check for being a senator.

[rrrod]

im damn proud the euroscum hates me!!!!!!!!!!

[texasflower]

I'm sure those fools think they are hurting our sensitive feelings.

Most of us wear their hatred as a badge of courage don't we?!

Les grands idiots muets!!

[TMSuchman]

Isan't the Senate going to dock his pay, for missing so many votes?

[Oberon]

Anyone notice how J. F-ing Kerry is traveling around the country for almost the last year has missed 68 of 70 votes since the first of the year and continues to gleefully accept that check for being a senator.

Well, at least we have that to be thankful for.

[Lady Jag]

Barfo Profundo if those foreign funds buy US a socialist country.

1...2...3...barf.

[tang-soo]

No word yet from Lower Volta, Upper Slobbovia

How about these guys from Elbonia?