Actor-writer Spalding Gray's body found

[MouseyMama]

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March 8, 2004, 3:16PM

Actor-writer Spalding Gray's body found Associated Press

AP/New York Times Spalding Gray performs his monologue, "Morning, Noon and Night," at the Beaumont theater in New York in this 1999 file photo.

NEW YORK -- The body of actor-writer Spalding Gray was pulled from the East River over the weekend, two months after he walked out of his Manhattan apartment and disappeared. He was 62.

Gray, who laid bare his life and mingled performance art with comedy in acclaimed monologues like "Swimming to Cambodia" and "It's a Slippery Slope," was identified today through dental records and X-rays.

The cause of his death was still under investigation, said Ellen Borakove, a spokeswoman for the medical examiner. But Gray was known to have been deeply troubled and had attempted suicide before.

His family told police he was last seen Saturday Jan. 10. Throughout his disappearance, his wife, Kathleen Russo, had held out scant hope that he might still be alive.

"Everyone that looks like him from behind, I go up and check to make sure it's not him," Russo said in a phone interview with The Associated Press about a week ago. "If someone calls and hangs up, I always do star-69. You're always thinking, 'maybe.'"

Gray's riveting live performances generally featured only a desk and a glass of water as props. Usually wearing his trademark plaid flannel shirt, the performer would never move from the desk as he read in a soft, New England-flecked accent.

In more than a dozen monologues starting in 1979, Gray told audiences about his childhood, "Sex and Death to the Age 14"; his adventures as a young man, "Booze, Cars and College Girls"; and his struggles as an actor, "A Personal History of the American Theater." Many were published in book form and several were made into films.

"The man may be the ultimate WASP neurotic, analyzing his actions with an intensity that would be unpleasantly egomaniacal if it weren't so self-deprecatingly funny," Associated Press Drama Critic Michael Kuchwara wrote in 1996. "He questions everything and ends up more exhausted than satisfied."

Gray's greatest success was his Obie-winning monologue "Swimming to Cambodia," which recounted in part his movie role opposite Sam Waterston in "The Killing Fields." The monologue, developed over two years of performance, became a film directed by Jonathan Demme.

His book "Gray's Anatomy," about his struggles with a serious eye problem, was also made into a film.

Gray turned a midlife crisis into "It's a Slippery Slope," a 1997 monologue that mingled ski stories with tales of his new role as a father.

He also had an active career in Hollywood, with roles in films including David Byrne's "True Stories," "Beaches" and "The Paper" -- 38 film appearances in all. In the 1993 Steven Soderbergh film "King of the Hill," he played an eccentric bachelor who kills himself.

On Broadway, he starred as the stage manager in the 1989 revival of "Our Town," a production that won a Tony Award for best revival. In 2000, he was in the less-acclaimed revival of Gore Vidal's 1960 political drama, "The Best Man."

But Gray's life in recent years was marred by tragedy and depression.

A horrific head-on car crash during a 2001 vacation in Ireland left him disheartened and in poor health, and he tried jumping from a bridge near his Long Island home in October 2002.

He was twice hospitalized for depression after the crash, and his suicide attempt canceled the run of a new solo piece, "Black Spot."

Gray, whose mother committed suicide when she was 52, spoke openly about considering the same fate. In a 1997 interview, he even provided an epitaph for his tombstone: "An American Original: Troubled, Inner-Directed and Cannot Type."

Gray was born on June 5, 1941, one of three sons of a WASP couple in Barrington, R.I. His mother suffered a pair of nervous breakdowns, committing suicide in 1967 after the second one.

[MouseyMama]

God rest his soul....A brilliant man. Depression, can hit *any* one of us

[billorites]

This is terribly sad.

[RetiredArmy]

Sorry, never heard of the guy.

[anniegetyourgun]

depression can hit any one of us

Well, I for one, will refuse to participate.

[motzman]

Well, I for one, will refuse to participate.

Funny quip, but for many it's not a choice...

[billorites]

Very talented writer/monologist with a wry sense of humor.

[fishbabe]

winston churchill had it and he called it,the black dog....he started painting because it helped his depression....

[billorites]

[TheBattman]

Actually, it somewhat IS a choice. Yes there are chemical imbalances that can play into depression, but many of the chemical imbalances result from the body dealing with a state of mind.

It's all in how people deal with the world around them. IF they allow it to get to them, they set the ball rolling - and the chemicals getting goofy in the brain. Once the chemicals get goofy enough, it becomes quite difficult to pull yourself out of the downs - often requiring medication to turn the situation around.

Much like some people who are more inclined to become alcoholic or drug addicted, some people are more inclined to delve into a depressed state. And like the alcoholic - if you allow yourself to dwell in a depressed state, you are more likely to get stuck there.

Flame suit on.....

[GEC]

Dittos.

It's always good to remove doubt, but past suicide attempts suggested that he had done himself in when he had gone missing.

Condolences to his family, especially the child(ren).

[VaBthang4]

Dont know who he is.

[phugg]

I remember an appearance on David Letterman when he stated that he was applying morning urine to his head to treat baldness.

Dave asked, "Well how do you put it on?"

[MineralMan]

"Dont know who he is."

No? Then why comment at all? In any case, you can read the article and find out who he was.

I saw him doing "Swimming to Cambodia" live a couple of times. He's a pretty good monologist, in my opinion.

[dljordan]

A lot of depression is caused by stress. You get stressed out about job, family, etc. and pretty soon your health suffers, you get depressed, you get stressed about the depression and on an on.

[pt17]

Flame suit on.....

No flame from here. I've seen people work themselves out of deep clinical depression without drugs.

[motzman]

Flame suit on.....

No need. For many, they have problems dealing with the world around them. And for some, no amount of therapy, hard work, or training can help.

But many can beat depression without drugs or radical therapy.

[RetiredArmy]

Nope. Sorry. Still don't know the guy. But, after Jimmy Stewart, John Wayne, and all my cowboy favorites died, I kinda am out of the movie business. Mel Gibson and a couple of others, Bruce Willis. But I am sick of Hollyweird. My wife and I guy all the old movies on DVD and watch those. I am about to cancel my cable. I am sick of all the garbage on it. $49.95 a month for worthless B.S. crap.

[RetiredArmy]

Actually "guy" should be go. My bad.

[Hatteras]

"A lot of depression is caused by stress. You get stressed out about job, family, etc. and pretty soon your health suffers, you get depressed, you get stressed about the depression and on an on."

It's all about faith and attitude, in that order. If I used job stress, etc. as an excuse I would have done myself in years ago. Every day is a new opportunity to learn and to do something new. If you feel that you should not have to prove yourself in one way or another, to yourself or anyone else, than you might as well call it quits. Those that demand respect based on some self-centered ego seem to be the most stressed.

Me? I like to keep it humble. If things don't go my way... I downshift, figure out where the problem lies and do what I can to solve the situation. I can blame my problems on others, but in the end, that doesn't help me one bit. I just thank the good Lord every morning when I wake up and find myself still on this side of the grass.

In the meantime, my end goal of owning my quaint little seaside bar will happen one day. But heck, if that never happens, I'll at least spend my share of time on the patron's side of the bar.

[vikk]

You are simply talking about yourself. I think it's pointless and more than a little presumptuous to pass a judgement on someone else's brain chemistry, because you're not walking in their shoes. It's not within miles of an either/or thing, because we're talking about the most complex of organs. Some people never have to deal with depression. Others who get depressed and can pull themselves out are lucky. I've lost more than a few friends who had plenty to live for, but just couldn't pull themselves out of the spiral. From seeing it up close, I can tell you that it is not a rational decision.