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Yer very welcome, my FRiend...now, a joke...

A tourist walked into a Chinese curio shop in San Francisco. While looking around at the exotic merchandise, he noticed a very lifelike, life-sized, bronze statue of a rat. It had no price tag, but was so incredibly striking the tourist decided he must have it.

He took it to the old shop owner and asked, "How much for the bronze rat?"

"Ahhh, you have chosen wisely! It is $12 for the rat, $100 for the story," said the wise old Chinaman.

The tourist quickly pulled out twelve dollars. "I'll just take the rat,you can keep the story".

As he walked down the street carrying his bronze rat, the tourist noticed that a few real rats had crawled out of the alleys and sewers and had begun following him down the street. This was a bit disconcerting so he began walking faster. A couple blocks later he looked behind him and saw to his horror the herd of rats behind him had grown to hundreds, and they began squealing. Sweating now, the tourist began to trot toward the Bay.

Again, after a couple blocks, he looked around only to discover that the rats now numbered in the MILLIONS, and were squealing and coming toward him faster and faster.

Terrified, he ran to the edge of the Bay and threw the bronze rat as far as he could into the Bay. Amazingly, the millions of rats all jumped into the Bay after the bronze rat, and were all drowned.

The man ran back to the curio shop in Chinatown. "Ahhh," said the owner, "You have come back for story?"

"No sir," said the man, "I came back to see if you have a bronze DemocRAT."

Cute MUD. Here's one I just got from my old High School sweetie:

A guy goes to the dentist to get a tooth pulled. The dentist tells him "I'll give you a shot to numb your jaw". The man moans and says he is afraid of needles. The dentist says he will give him gas to knock him out and the man says he's allergic to gas. The dentist thinks a minute and leaves and returns with a couple pills. The man asks him "what are these for?". The dentist replies "they are viagra pills. They won't help the pain but it will give you something to hold on to while I pull your tooth".