My favorite quotes

[SAJ]

''If you pick up a starving dog, and feed him and make him well, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man.'' -- Mark Twain

''There are lies, there are damned lies, ... and then there are statistics.'' -- Benjamin Disraeli

''The Germans are just like women; one can hardly appreciate their depths. They haven't any.'' -- Freidrich Nietzche

''Pouring ketchup/From the bottle/None'll come/And then a lot'll.'' -- Ogden Nash

''You probably should cut that pizza into only four slices. I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat six.'' -- Lawrence Peter 'Yogi' Berra

''I've had a very nice evening, but this wasn't it.'' -- Julius 'Groucho' Marx

''Man, if you have to ask, you'll never know.'' -- Louis Armstrong, on the subject of Jazz (or, any politician on the subject of the Constitution)

[SAJ]

''The early worm **DESERVES** the bird.'' -- Robert A. Heinlein

[Fledermaus]

That happens alot. It's like the memebership date only goes into effect after midnight or something.

[Redcloak]

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside a dog, it's too dark to read. --Groucho Marx

[Fledermaus]

What's that quote attributed to Churchill about some bimbo telling him he was a drunk and he replied, "madam, in the morning I'll be sober but you will still be ugly" or something to that effect?

[longfellow]

Thanks, this is great.

[BushMeister]

Every election is a sort of advance auction sale of stolen goods.
--H. L. Mencken

[Prime Choice]

Curiosity killed the cat...

...and for a while, many of us were considered suspects.

[PurVirgo]

LOL - too funny

[nolu chan]

Lady: Winston, you are drunk.
Churchill: And madam, you are ugly, but in the morning I shall be sober.

Lady: Sir, if you were my husband I'd put poison in your tea!
Chuchill: Ma'm, if you were my wife I'd drink it.

[Fledermaus]

THANKS! I love that story.

[Right_in_Virginia]

Great post...thanks!

[Iowa Granny]

Welcome to FR. Marking for a later read.

[fishbabe]

then there's the churchill quote when he was at a party.a woman sitting next to him said,if i was your wife i'd serve you poison and churchill replied,if i was your husband,i'd drink it....

[KeyWest]

Thanks for a great post.

[solzhenitsyn]

Yeah, those exchanges were between Churchill and Lady Astor, a political rival. As I recall, Lady Astor was at one time the Minister of Agriculture (hope that's the correct title), a post she got due to her political clout, rather than her knowledge of farming. Churchill said something in a parliamentary debate (I believe) along the lines that he doubted that the Minister of Agriculture could say how many toes were on a pig's foot. Lady Astor replied, "Well, take your little shoesies off, dear, and we'll have a look!"

[jocon307]

"Churchill quote about liberal before 30 etc. is apocryphal. He almost certainly never said it."

I always thought Shaw said that. I thought I read it in Bartlett's familiar quotations, years ago. I'll look it up later and post again if I find it.

[CTOCS]

The "bimbo" was Dame Lady Astor. He said it to her at a party.

She approached him and said, "Sir Winston, you're drunk." He replied, "Yes, madam, and your'e ugly. But I'll be sober in the morning."

[ChadGore]

Welcome to FR