The issue is authority. What you are looking for is a clear voice to teach the essential matters of faith and morals and the guarantee that this voice will never teach error in such important matters.
This is one of the reasons I became a Catholic.
I, unlike you, don't want authority as in telling me what to do, but rather leading and teaching me the proper way to have my faith.
You can have authority, yet be kind and thoughtful, but many (most) can't balance both.