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'What happened to your queer party-friends?' - Ann Coulter
townhall.com ^ | 1/22/04 | Ann Coulter

Posted on 01/21/2004 9:28:04 PM PST by kattracks

The endless receding nightmare of the Iowa caucuses has finally produced something interesting: The Democrats have one hellacious catfight on their hands.

After all the hoopla about Howard Dean's new mass movement of "Deaniacs," it appears that blanketing Iowa with self-righteous 20-year-olds in orange wool caps may not have been the ideal campaign strategy. Dean's distant third-place finish makes you want to ask him the question Jack Nicholson put to his down-and-out gay neighbor in "As Good As It Gets": "What happened to your queer party-friends?"

At the behest of the Democratic Party establishment, the media dutifully destroyed Howard Dean, the legitimate leader of the opposition. Democratic voters are so obedient to the media, they followed their media puppet masters and instantly switched from Dean to John Kerry.

But Dean still has the money and foot soldiers and endorsements to stay in the fight for the foreseeable future. And being from Vermont, Dean should do well in New Hampshire. I went to a public school, but if I remember my high-school geography correctly, New Hampshire and Vermont are the same state.

Until Kerry won Iowa, Wesley Clark was viewed as the pre-eminent electable Democrat principally because he's a Republican. Howard Dean has already said he believes Clark is a fine fellow but truly a Republican. In response, Gen. Clark immediately put on a third sweater.

Sadly, it may turn out that Clark's whole raison d'etre is now gone. Never was so much money, media, chicanery, Gwyneth Paltrow, Madonna, conniving and Cabala deployed to promote a quote-unquote "electable" Democrat.

Clark was supposed to be the phony American to stop Dean, but Kerry is the even better phony American! And he's already stopped Dean in Iowa!

Kerry and Clark now represent the two major wings of the Democratic Party – the Kennedy wing and the Clinton wing. One drowns you after the extramarital affair; the other one calls you a stalker.

Other than that, there isn't a hair's difference between any of the Democrats on any substantive issues.

All the Democrats are for higher taxes. All of them favor Hillary's socialist health-care plan. All of them are for higher pay for teachers and nurses – and no pay at all for anyone in the pharmaceutical or oil industries, especially Halliburton executives, who should be sent to Guantanamo. All the Democrats believe the way to strike fear in the hearts of the terrorists is for the federal government to invest heavily in windmills.

All the Democrats oppose the war. And all the Democrats who took a position on the war before it began were for it, but now believe that everything Bush did from that moment forward has been bad! bad! bad! This is with the exception of Joe Lieberman who, as an observant Jew, is forbidden to backpedal after sundown on Fridays. Representing a large flabby chunk of the Kennedy wing, Ted Kennedy gave a speech last week in which he called the liberation of Iraq a "political product." Then again, Ted Kennedy calls Chivas Regal "that life-sustaining liquid."

Finally, all the candidates are willing to sell out any of these other issues in service of the secret burning desire of all Democrats: abortion on demand. If they could just figure out a way to abort babies using solar power, that's all we'd ever hear about.

For all his talk, even Dick Gephardt was willing to abandon blue-collar workers in a heartbeat. The Teamsters haven't asked for much, only two big votes in the past decade: (1) Oppose NAFTA, and (2) support drilling on a small, godforsaken patch of the Alaskan wilderness, as the people who actually live there have been begging us to do for decades. Like all the other Democrats, Gephardt voted against the Teamsters – but with Barbra Streisand – to oppose drilling in the godforsaken Alaskan wilderness.

When Gephardt entered politics he was pro-life. But then, like Al Gore, Jesse Jackson, Dennis Kucinich and scores of other Democrats with national ambitions, he quickly figured out that position wasn't, well ... viable. In short order he had adopted the whole NARAL party line. That's how you woo old-time union Democrats.

On Monday night, Gephardt was shocked to discover that blue-collar Democrats have gone the way of patriotic Democrats: They're all Republicans now. (But thanks for that NAFTA vote a decade ago!) You knew Gephardt was toast when even responsible journalists have started using words like "decent" and "solid" to describe the two-faced weasel from Missouri. Though I suppose "decent" has a pretty broad meaning in a party that still admires Bill Clinton.

The Iowa caucus was just another one of the Democrats' ongoing public debates about how to fake out the American people. Fifty percent of Iowa Democrats participating in the caucus said they "strongly disapprove" of the war with Iraq and another 25 percent "somewhat disapprove."

But more important to Democrats than their pacifism was "electability." The entire Iowa electorate was committed to the proposition: How do we fool the neighbors? In the end, the caucus-goers chose a decorated war hero who voted in favor of the very war that 75 percent of them oppose. So much for the anti-war fever sweeping the country. The Democrats aren't even man enough to run a genuine coward for president.

Ann Coulter is host of AnnCoulter.org, a Townhall.com member group.

©2003 Universal Press Syndicate

Contact Ann Coulter | Read Coulter's biography



TOPICS: Editorial; News/Current Events; Politics/Elections
KEYWORDS: 2004; anncoulter; anncoulterlist; dean; deaniacs; iowa
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To: kattracks
But Dean still has the money and foot soldiers and endorsements to stay in the fight for the foreseeable future.

Remember all the hoopla over Vice President Al Gore's endorsement of Dean, and Senator Bill Bradley's, and President Jimmy Carter, and Senator Tom Harkin's? What happens to them and their credibility if Dean tanks? What was the value of their endorsements, and the value of anyone's, frankly, if the media whiplashes from these to the next set of endorsements of Kerry, or Edwards, like it never happpened?

-PJ

21 posted on 01/21/2004 9:59:40 PM PST by Political Junkie Too (It's not safe yet to vote Democrat.)
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To: KneelBeforeZod
Easy. I think of a man, and I take away reason and accountability. ..." Easily the great line of the movie.
22 posted on 01/21/2004 10:02:51 PM PST by Hoosier-Daddy (It's a fight to the death with Democrats.)
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To: Blue Jays
"Don't y'all know the RULES around here?"


What do we have to do . . . ???

Come on . . .

Still waiting . . .

Okay already . . .

P. I. C. T. U. R. E. S. of Ann, please?
23 posted on 01/21/2004 10:04:42 PM PST by BluSky (“Don’t make me come down there.”)
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To: FormerACLUmember
I only came here for the pikshurs....

HEY!!

24 posted on 01/21/2004 10:09:38 PM PST by onehipdad
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To: kattracks
This is one of her funniest articles, it reads like Dave Barry might write if he had testicles.
25 posted on 01/21/2004 10:12:45 PM PST by Richard Kimball
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To: BluSky
Teddy looked miserable at the State of the Union speech last night because he couldn't bring his Chivas IV drip in with him.
26 posted on 01/21/2004 10:18:21 PM PST by 3catsanadog (When anything goes, everything does.)
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To: kattracks
You have sinned badly. You have posted an article by Ann without posting a picture. May a thousand ZOTS befall you!!
:)
27 posted on 01/21/2004 10:24:28 PM PST by cpdiii (RPH, and Oil Field Trash (an educated roughneck))
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To: kattracks
'What happened to your queer party-friends?'

He's in New Hampshire.

28 posted on 01/21/2004 10:29:32 PM PST by martin_fierro (Caught you looking.)
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To: kattracks
Ann at the top of the key, she shoots "Democrats believe the way to strike fear in the hearts of the terrorists is for the federal government to invest heavily in windmills" she scores!

Out at the three point line "If they could just figure out a way to abort babies using solar power" - net!

No stopping her, drives the lane, smashes through the foul "The Democrats aren't even man enough to run a genuine coward for president" and the wee thing dunks it! Glass all over the floor! And the right side of the stands are going wild ladies and gents... <p.

29 posted on 01/21/2004 10:35:10 PM PST by JasonC
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To: cpdiii
Sorry about that.


30 posted on 01/21/2004 10:39:09 PM PST by kattracks
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To: 3catsanadog
"Teddy looked miserable at the State of the Union speech last night because he couldn't bring his Chivas IV drip in with him."

Oh, but he DID have his Chivas IV drip rigged up through the House chambers floor and into his chair!

Staffers had a wire hidden on him . . . and an open mic intercepted some of the communication into the earpiece Teddy was wearing.

Unfortunetely for him, the cameras panned (Teddy shaking his head) just as he was being asked whether or not he was feeling any chivas coming through the IV drip.

The next time we see him giving the 'kill' sign, with him brushing his hand across his neck several times, and apparently was letting the guys in the booth know that he still wasn't getting any liquor through his IV drip and to stop immediately because, air instead was coming through the lines and into his body.

He was overheard to say that as soon as blowhard Bush was done he'd see to it that he'd be at the bar and would just get it himself and, everyone is fired . . . or, something something something. (Inaudible)
31 posted on 01/21/2004 10:59:12 PM PST by BluSky (“Don’t make me come down there.”)
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To: kattracks
This is funnier than Steyn has been of late. I've said it before, and I'll say it again -- in a previous life, Annie was a Borscht Belt comic.
32 posted on 01/21/2004 11:01:41 PM PST by mrustow
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To: Blue Jays
Don't y'all know the RULES around here?

Rule #5

There is NO Rule #5!

Mark

33 posted on 01/21/2004 11:08:16 PM PST by MarkL
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To: KneelBeforeZod
It should read...

": How do you write women Democrats so well?"

"Easy. I think of a man, and I take away reason and accountability. ..."

Mark

34 posted on 01/21/2004 11:10:34 PM PST by MarkL
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To: martin_fierro
Hey...

That's not her.
35 posted on 01/21/2004 11:42:08 PM PST by moonhawk (Like most of the Right Wing, I "just don't get it". Apparently, it's not contagious.)
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To: kattracks
Nice photo of Ann.

"What's a nice girl like you doing carrying that long, long, long straight razor?!"

36 posted on 01/22/2004 12:38:04 AM PST by lentulusgracchus (Et praeterea caeterum censeo, delenda est Carthago. -- M. Porcius Cato)
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To: goldstategop
ann is really more right that she is letting on. There was a FR thread indicating many of the "get together" parties were organized by homosexual groups. So much for the Dr. Dean election campaign dating service.
37 posted on 01/22/2004 12:45:07 AM PST by longtermmemmory (Vote!)
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To: kattracks
Kerry and Clark now represent the two major wings of the Democratic Party – the Kennedy wing and the Clinton wing.

Actually, Ann might have something there.

There was a time when the Clintons and Kennedys were playing snuggle-bunnies during summer vacations on Martha's Vineyard. Is that still true? Or are they rivals now?

But she's right, I think, about Wes Clark's being a Clinton stalking-horse to stop Dean and keep open Hillary's options for a brokered convention this summer, if it looks like the economy is going sour and the Dems might have a chance after all. They're trying like hell to convince themselves they have a chance, with this WaPo push-poll that talks about Arbusto's "re-elect numbers" opposite a "generic" Democrat. (Although I didn't notice anyone named "Generic" filing for the primaries.)

38 posted on 01/22/2004 12:45:43 AM PST by lentulusgracchus (Et praeterea caeterum censeo, delenda est Carthago. -- M. Porcius Cato)
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To: kattracks
I went to a public school, but if I remember my high-school geography correctly, New Hampshire and Vermont are the same state.

Now, now Ann. You know better than that. They may be next to each other, but the difference between the two are night and day.

New Hampshire is populated by sane people while Vermont is populated by total communists. Big difference.

And the laws between the two, the tax codes, etc. show they are very different.

I know it was a throw-away line, but she should be more careful.

39 posted on 01/22/2004 12:50:19 AM PST by Fledermaus (Democrats are just not capable of defending our nation's security. It's that simple!)
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To: FormerACLUmember
I don't think so. In fact, I think Anne was drunk when she wrote this. Most of it is contradictory and doesn't make sense.
40 posted on 01/22/2004 2:45:33 AM PST by Clock King (If I die, my associates will avenge my death; and some of them are Vulcan.)
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