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2004 Dirty Dozen "Violent Toys, DVDS and Games" - Laugh at the ninnies!!!
Lion and Lamb Project ^ | 11-25-03

Posted on 11/25/2003 1:56:37 PM PST by Dan from Michigan

From the lefist weaklings at the Lion and Lamb Project:

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Action figure: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Casey
Jones, Playmates, Ages 4+
Video Game: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Konami, rated E for Everyone.

The toy: From the Casey Jones action figure box: "Judge, jury and enforcer! … Casey has a unique sense of what’s right or wrong and you better be on the side of right or he’ll slapshot you upside your head with his hockey stick. This hockey mask-wearing vigilante roams the streets of New York City serving up his brand of quick justice to punks and thugs."

The brand: The seemingly cute Ninja Turtles – being "relaunched" in 2003 -- actually behave according to a vigilante code, where they (and not law enforcement officials) are "judge, jury and enforcer!" The box illustration of another toy in this brand -- the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Combat Lair (for six-year-olds, by Mega Bloks) – depicts a scene of gleeful mayhem as the ninjas fight "bad guys" with ninja chains, swords and overturned barrels. In addition to the TV program, this brand is marketed by three movies and a video game. http://www.konami.com

Power Rangers Ninja Storm Action figure: Ninja Training Playset, Ban Dai, ages 4+ Video Game: Power Rangers Ninja Storm , THQ Inc., rated E for Everyone

The toy: This year’s version of the ubiquitous Power Rangers also focuses on ninjas. The current villain is Lothor, who "kidnapped students at 19 ninja schools in an evil plan to take over the world. Now the battle is on!" A frightening story line for four-year-olds, who don’t fully understand the difference between fantasy and reality. Yet the "Training Playset" urges pre-schoolers to "start Ninja Storm training today!"

The brand: Like Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, this is another television-generated brand with the message that the best way to solve problems is through violence. While the Power Rangers are portrayed as "good guys," they solve problems through fighting. For example, the Tsunami Cycle toy features the Red Ranger and "Missile Firing Action!" http://www.bandai.com

Transformers Action figure: Transformers Universe Razorclaw, Hasbro, Ages 5+ Video Game: Beast Wars Transformers, Hasbro Interactive, rated E for Everyone

The toy: This robot has "projectile-launching attack wings, firing battle quills" and "launching cannons." Since this is a toy for pre-schoolers, it has "missiles [that] fit in hands for hand-to-hand battle!" To introduce even younger children to this brand, Hasbro markets a Playskool version called Transformer Go-Bots targeting three-year-olds and their parents.

The brand: This is another toy/TV program with a totally inappropriate story line for preschoolers. From the Razorclaw toy box: "In the distant future, the evil Unicron wages a final war for ultimate control of the Universe … As the enemy sides clash in the biggest war the Universe has ever seen, their bodies emit a powerful radiation known as Energon. Little do they know that Unicron is secretly harvesting this mysterious force to increase his own strength!" A tot prequel for The Matrix? http://www.hasbro.com

World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE)
Action figure: WWE Training Day, Jakks Pacific, Ages on box range from 3 to 12+
Video Game: WWE Smackdown! Here comes the Pain, THQ Inc., rated T for Teen

The Toy: This is a "training" set of WWE action figures. "Are you tough enough to train with these WWE superstars?" the wording on the box asks children. This is part of the "Ruthless Aggression" series and is "safety tested for ages 8 and up."

The brand: Although the WWE website tells parents that the television show is "tailored for teens and young adults," WWE licenses numerous action figures, video games and other products for children. Jakks Pacific also offers an "Elimination Chamber" playset, and a series of "Flex’ems" action figures with proportions that can only be achieved with massive doses of steroids. http://www.thq.com

Deceptive Branding:
The Sequel That Isn’t

Jak Video Game: Jak II, Naughty Dog, rated T for Teen

The video game: The story begins after Jak bursts out of prison, where he has been tortured for two years. He is angry and "practically shaking with bloodlust and thirst for revenge," according to one review (Toronto Star.) The game’s producers were influenced by the adult-rated Grand Theft Auto, according to several reviews. "The thing is Grand Theft Auto with elves and a talking rat. What a brilliant idea," notes the Star.

The brand: Jak II sounds like a sequel, but it isn’t. The original game in this series – Jak and Daxter – was rated E for Everyone and was a cute game about a young elf named Jak and his pet, a talking rat named Daxter. Parents who feel comfortable with this "brand" are in for a rude surprise if they purchase the sequel for their young children.
http://www.naughtydog.com

From Preschool to PG-13:
Marketing Movies, DVDs, Toys and Video Games to Tots

The Hulk (movie and DVD rated PG-13) Action figure: Kid Powered Roaring Hulk, Toy Biz, Ages 3+ Video game: The Incredible Hulk, Universal Interactive, rated E for Everyone

The Toy: This "Roaring Hulk" is a stuffed green toy that looks as friendly and harmless as the Jolly Green Giant – but is based on a PG-13 movie about rage. If toddlers punch this Hulk in the chest, it emits a cry. The copy reads: "Easily excited by sunny days, weekends, and ice cream trucks, Bruce Banner turns into the green playing machine known as the Hulk. The Hulk likes to jump, lift things, and has a unique ability to heal quickly."

The brand: The Hulk was originally a comic book, but the recent marketing blitz of toys, costumes, video game and other products are all related to the release of the PG-13 movie. The Incredible Hulk video game suggests that children "Rage through more than 30 levels of intense action, crushing everything and everyone in your way." http://www.marvel.com

X-Men (movie and DVD rated PG-13)
Video game: X2 Wolverine’s Revenge, Activision, rated E for Everyone
Action figure: X-Men United Wolverine, Toy Biz, ages 5+

The video game: This videogame is marketed to children ages 6 and up, yet it was released in conjunction with a PG-13 movie. "Use lethal combo attacks and rely on your mutant healing factor in intense action and stealth scenarios," urges the video game box. "Prepare to meet your makers."

The brand: The movie has "intense and graphic comic-book-style violence, including injury and death of characters," according to a review by the Movie Mom. Yet the toys and video game are marketed to children as young as four with action figures such as X-Men Legends (Toy Biz). Part of the "legend" is that the Wolverine character has "razor-sharp claws" and "helps protect a world that fears and hates mutants." This is yet another confusing story line for pre-schoolers who have enough fears of their own without adding imaginary ones. http://www.activision.com

Spider-Man (movie and DVD rated PG-13) Video Game: Spider-Man, Activision, Rated: E for Everyone Action figure: Spider-Man Wolverine vs. Venom Carnage, Toy Biz, ages 4+

The video game: The video game is rated E for Everyone (ages 6+), although the movie was a violent PG-13. "Fight notorious bosses and an assortment of freak-specimens, criminals and tunnel dwellers," the game box suggests to first-graders. "You don’t just play it … You live it."

The brand: While this brand started out as a cartoon, it is the recent PG-13 movie – in which a man is impaled and killed on-screen – that spawned an entire line of toys and other items for young children. One of the toys marketed under the Spiderman name – the Spider-Man Wolverine vs. Venom Carnage play set -- promises preschoolers "Punching, Kicking and Missile-Launching Action."
http://www.marvel.com

2 Fast 2 Furious (movie and DVD rated PG-13) Video Game: The Fast and the Furious, Vivendi Universal Games, rated T for Teen
Toy: 2 Fast 2 Furious Die Cast Cars, RC2 Brands, Ages 8+

The DVD: Many critics questioned the PG-13 rating of this movie, suggesting it should have been rated R. The movie contained one particularly excruciating torture scene, where a man has a rat placed on his stomach and the implied action suggests that the rat will try to escape by eating into his stomach. The movie has "a great deal of violence, including gunplay," notes the Movie Mom.

The brand: This adult brand featuring speed and violence is being marketed down to children through two movies – the original Fast and Furious and the current sequel – in addition to a DVD and video game. There is even a series of die-cast cars marketing this brand to elementary-school children with the following message: "Buckle yourself into the lifestyle of The Fast and the Furious – a world of attitude … where the cars remain the stars, and your name is only as good as your quarter-mile time!"
http://www.vugames.com

From Hollywood, with Love:
Adult Movies, Teen-Rated Video Games

The Matrix
DVD: Matrix Reloaded, Warner Brothers, rated R Video Game: Enter the Matrix, Infogrames, rated T for Teen

The video game: This video game is rated T for Teen, yet is based on an R-rated adult movie. Enter the Matrix is written and directed by the Wachowski Brothers, who also wrote and directed the movie, and includes "previously unseen film footage" from the adult-rated movie. The game features a "sniper mode" and allows players to "ride shotgun, shooting from passenger’s seat."

The brand: The Matrix trilogy has been described as a marketing phenomenon as much as a movie. While the brand is allegedly intended for adults, release of the teen-rated companion video game on the same day as the movie raises questions about the true intended audience. Other products used to market this brand include action figures, a Matrix Reloaded DVD, a daylong MTV special (teens are a prime audience of MTV), and a Powerade drink.
http://www2.warnerbros.com

Terminator
DVD: Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines, Warner Brothers, rated R
Video Game: Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines, Atari, rated T for Teen

The video game: Another example of a video game rated T for Teen but based on an adult-rated movie. As in the Enter the Matrix game, this video game "weaves in and out of the movie script," according to an Atari press release. Terminator 3 features "exclusive film footage created specifically for the release of the videogame and not available in the motion picture." The release boasts that players will be able "to engage in true movie-like Terminator combat" through moves such as "smashing opponents into walls, massive two-handed chops and crushing kicks." www.ea.com

PUSHING THE ENVELOPE

Manhunt
Video Game: Manhunt, Rockstar, rated M for Mature

The video game: Manhunt is a "tense, nerve-wracking experience filled with beatings and gruesome deaths," according to the IGN web review. It is "brutal, a little sadistic and perhaps even cruel," according to the same review. Weapons range from shards of glass to baseball bats, shotguns, meat cleavers, and plastic bags for suffocating victims. The video game includes the filming of a virtual snuff film. ("It’s best to think of these flicks as home movies where your relatives do unsightly things to one another and one of them winds up dead," notes the GameSpot review.)

The brand: This game is produced by the same company that created the Grand Theft Auto series, which pushed the envelope on violence. The Grand Theft Auto series was very popular with teenagers, yet it is "tame" compared to this newest game, according to a review on the gaming website Shacknews. Even though Manhunt is rated M for Mature by the video game industry, teenagers can easily purchase this game. According to the most recent Federal Trade Commission secret shopper survey, 69 percent of underage teenagers were able to buy M-rated games at retail stores.
http://www.rockstargames.com/


TOPICS: News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: jokers; liberals; lionandlamb; toys; wartoys
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I remember the Turtles from about 15 years ago. After seeing Casey Jones, I decided to ride the train, high on cocaine, and beat up people with my hockey stick. The cartoon told me too.....

I never was into the power rangers since they started when I was older.

Jax says T right on the box

I remember the 80's and the Arnold Movies all rated R that all the kids likes, as well as Die Hard, Indiana Jones, Crocodile Dundee rated R or PG-13. Most of the cartoons like GI Joe back then even had GASP! GUNS!!!

R rated movies had games based on them for years. Platoon? Die Hard?

And of course Rock Star Games with another M rated game....(That means R ninnies). I have to check out "Manhunt". I liked Vice City and Max Payne(for computer), so I'll take a look at it.

1 posted on 11/25/2003 1:56:38 PM PST by Dan from Michigan
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To: Dan from Michigan
I'll take two.
2 posted on 11/25/2003 1:58:34 PM PST by Az Joe
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To: Dan from Michigan
I've been wondering what to get my Great Nephews.
Thanks for the shopping list.

SO9

3 posted on 11/25/2003 2:06:50 PM PST by Servant of the 9 (The voices tell me to stay home and clean the guns.)
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To: Dan from Michigan
INTREP - PC ALERT
4 posted on 11/25/2003 2:07:16 PM PST by LiteKeeper
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To: Dan from Michigan
Good deal, just in time for Yule shopping for my niece and nephews.
5 posted on 11/25/2003 2:07:25 PM PST by cryptical
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To: Dan from Michigan
My son grew up playing with Ninja Turtles, loved all the movies, faithfully watched the cartoon.

He's almost 18 now and he has not shown any leanings toward becoming a ninja, slapped anyone with a hocky stick or attacked anyone with martial arts weapons.

Hmm..
6 posted on 11/25/2003 2:07:44 PM PST by Trampled by Lambs (...and pecked by the dove...)
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To: LiteKeeper
What's wrong with the list? It seems like it could be helpful for parents who want to buy video games for their kids, and want to avoid games with too much violence or other objectionable material.
7 posted on 11/25/2003 2:10:04 PM PST by halfdome
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To: Dan from Michigan
You know, if I were a little more entrepenurial, I'd look into creating a new chain of franchized mall stores - ToyGunz.

We'd sell all the toys that Toys'R'Us refuses to - radio-control tanks that shoot plastic pellets, water pistols, BB guns, etc., etc.

And top it off with an indoor AirSoft range.

8 posted on 11/25/2003 2:10:32 PM PST by jdege
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To: Trampled by Lambs
I guess he's not like all the young girls everyone around here is worried about -- the ones who turn into tramps from listening to Britney Spears.
9 posted on 11/25/2003 2:11:06 PM PST by halfdome
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To: jdege
You'll put your eye out!
10 posted on 11/25/2003 2:11:24 PM PST by Trampled by Lambs (...and pecked by the dove...)
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To: Trampled by Lambs
You'll put your eye out!

You're not here to put your eye out for your country, you're here to make the other poor dumb son-of-a-bitch put his eye out for his.

11 posted on 11/25/2003 2:12:53 PM PST by jdege
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To: Dan from Michigan
The brand: The seemingly cute Ninja Turtles – being "relaunched" in 2003 -- actually behave according to a vigilante code, where they (and not law enforcement officials) are "judge, jury and enforcer!" The box illustration of another toy in this brand -- the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Combat Lair (for six-year-olds, by Mega Bloks) – depicts a scene of gleeful mayhem as the ninjas fight "bad guys" with ninja chains, swords and overturned barrels. In addition to the TV program, this brand is marketed by three movies and a video game. http://www.konami.com
STFU! What idiots! I'm trying to keep from yelling at my computer right now...
12 posted on 11/25/2003 2:13:42 PM PST by WinOne4TheGipper (Tagline pending a review by the officials.)
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To: Dan from Michigan
I'm suprised that the "Big Bag 'o Broken Glass" didn't make the list this year.

It was my favorite toy way back when.

13 posted on 11/25/2003 2:15:10 PM PST by AngryJawa ("The bang is great, but the shockwave is where it’s at.")
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To: Dan from Michigan
Here's the recommended alternative toy for boys:


14 posted on 11/25/2003 2:16:30 PM PST by stands2reason ("Don't funk with my funk."--Bootsy Collins)
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To: Dan from Michigan
Wonder what sort of a rating they'd give to Hamas Barbie (complete with burqa and Semtex belt), the Tonka Rachel Corrie Playset, and Osama bin Laden--now with Kung Fu Grip!

}:-)4
15 posted on 11/25/2003 2:18:02 PM PST by Moose4 ("The road goes on forever, and the party never ends." --Robert Earl Keen)
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To: Dan from Michigan
A frightening story line for four-year-olds, who don’t fully understand the difference between fantasy and reality.

My four-year-old likes the Power Rangers and is completely clear on the fact that it is a bunch of actors running around in silly costumes battling other actors in rubber monster suits.

I think its funny when he laughs and says, “Ooooh! That’s gotta hurt!” when one of them gets smacked silly.

16 posted on 11/25/2003 2:25:33 PM PST by dead (I've got my eye out for Mullah Omar.)
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To: Dan from Michigan
Here are some cool vintage toys.
17 posted on 11/25/2003 2:30:15 PM PST by P.O.E. (To Be or Not To Be. What the heck kind of question is that?)
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To: halfdome
You must really get off on trolling. That's all you do here.
18 posted on 11/25/2003 2:33:34 PM PST by stands2reason ("Don't funk with my funk."--Bootsy Collins)
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To: AngryJawa
Where’s the Viking Kitty action figures set in this list?
19 posted on 11/25/2003 2:34:52 PM PST by Desron13
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To: Trampled by Lambs
Yeah, but I bet he walks around with a backpack on and enjoys pizza...

THOSE DAMN TURTLES!

20 posted on 11/25/2003 2:36:34 PM PST by Solson (Our work is the presentation of our capabilities. - Von Goethe)
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