[lodwick]

Three women are sitting naked in a sauna. Suddenly there is a beeping sound.
The first women presses her forearm and the beeping stops. The others look
at her curiously. That's my pager, she says, i have a microchip under the
skin of my arm.

A few minutes later a phone rings. The second woman lifts her palm to her
ear. When she finishes she explains, Thats my mobile phone. I have a
microchip in my hand.

The third woman, feeling decidedly low-tech, steps out of the sauna. In a
few minutes she returns with a piece of toilet paper hanging from the crack
of her butt. The others raise their eyebrows.

Oh, excuse me. I'm getting a Fax

[Teacup]

Viewers tap cable for Bush

With three of the major broadcast networks sticking to regularly scheduled fare Monday night, TV viewers who wanted President Bush's speech on Iraq turned to cable, giving cable news outlets a healthy ratings boost. Fox News Channel grabbed a 3.7 Nielsen Media Research rating for its coverage of Bush's address, which ran from 8:02 p.m. to 8:31 p.m. EST and collected 4.6 million viewers. Cable News Network attracted a 2.3 rating with 2.6 million viewers, and MSNBC notched a 1.1 rating and 1.2 million viewers.

GO BUSH GO!