Don't sell yourself short, now - the "emotional support" thing is the hard part, really. Don't be fooled by all that grunting and sweating - it's all an act, and the next time you get up to go to the bathroom or something, your wife and all the nurses will be laughing and joking about the fact that you bought it. So, when it looks like she's in the most terrible discomfort and pain near the end, you just go ahead and lean over and whisper "I'm on to you - I know you're faking it"....
That should get you a few years of sleeping on the couch ;)
You are a card general.
Funny, my wife didn't see the humor in it.